New Idea: Commercialized Medicinal Tape Worm - Administered to anyone i deem fatty fat fat. Genetically modified to die after about 3 weeks - Pro Version lasts for 5 weeks (2.5x cost). Causes you to lose 10-15lbs - then buy another tablet/pill so you don't put it back on.
Sell rights to Kraft Foods for xMillion$. Becel Margerine NOW WITH TAPE WORM. Feel less guilt when eating fat food. Big Mac with TW hold the pickles.
obesity yes, health no. People who eat shitty will still have unhealthy bodies even if the fat is taken out. You need your vitamins yo. Maybe you can genetically engineer the TW to eat fat and then shit out vitamins. Nice idea anyways.
I´m sorry but there´s already a trusted and better solution on the market. They call it: eating less. But I bet you´d have better PR and pwn the world anyway.
Hi, Chilly Mays here. Are YOU sick and tired of trying to lose weight? Impossible diets have your head spinning?
[frustrated man slams frozen diet dinner into the garbage on verge of frustration tears]"THERE'S GOT TO BE A BETTER WAY," he wails in desperation.
Well now there is! Introducing the Diet Worm: a military-grade, scientifically engineered creature that takes all the hassle and frustration out of losing weight. Our proven weight-loss method will have you in Bikini shape in no time! Here's how it works:
[scientific looking demonstration including infra-red model of human] The worm embeds itself into your small intestine, scarfing down excess food before it hits your notorious "trouble zones," wearing down those fat reserves faster than any diet on the market today. You're free to enjoy life while our patented creature goes to town on all those fatty nutrients.
[hot actress spins and accentuates a toned midsection] No more meal plans, no more hours at the gym, just pop in a worm and start living the way you've always dreamed. Here's how to order:
Some people may experience side effects when taking tape worm. Frequent side effects include impacted bowels, thinning of the blood, rapid calcium decomposition, vertigo and lupus. Other common side effects include yellowing of the skin and eyes, thoughts of suicide or an increased desire to gamble. In uncommon cases, there have been reported incidents of mania, an increased desire to rape or torture and some hair loss.
And what happens after the people get skinny? You'll get a lot of angry families sueing you for the deaths of their pudgy loved ones. I'd reccomend you declare bankrupty before that happens (first do some tests on subjects to determine how long it takes) and then move to somewhere like Oklahoma to hide.
Oh, and you'll want to bribe the FDA the way macdonalds does to get this on the market again.
On September 23 2010 05:52 Hidden_MotiveS wrote: And what happens after the people get skinny? You'll get a lot of angry families sueing you for the deaths of their pudgy loved ones..
I already covered this by genetically modifying the worm to die after 3 weeks.
beaten to it though. saw it on a science channel "the great depression 2 hour special"
illegal in most countries. HOWEVER. I don't beleive they genetically modified them to die from lysine deficiency or something or the other. They may sell if they were made to be weak against artificial "killers" and heavily resistant to other viruses and bacteria. If it were legal, then good idea. but we'd have to research genetics to do this probably (or at least tapeworm genetics). Also read michael crightons jurassic park, which was all based on real genetics. so i think i know what i am talking about.
On September 23 2010 05:34 HwangjaeTerran wrote: I´m sorry but there´s already a trusted and better solution on the market. They call it: eating less. But I bet you´d have better PR and pwn the world anyway.
On September 23 2010 05:52 Hidden_MotiveS wrote: And what happens after the people get skinny? You'll get a lot of angry families sueing you for the deaths of their pudgy loved ones..
I already covered this by genetically modifying the worm to die after 3 weeks.
Ahhh.. gotcha, I thought you meant the people eating the tapeworms died.
Oh god worst idea ever. I think I have a phobia of parasites, cause I'd have my head over the toilet vomiting for days if the doc told me I had a tapeworm. I don't care that I can just drink some medication to kill it. I need it out now now now. those bugs that lay eggs under your skin? I would indiscriminately scratch that shit out. I don't care about infection spread some penicillin on that I don't care get it ouuuut,
So no. I think you're idea is horrible and disgusting. And now I want to go vomit.