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(long read) i apologize if my grammar is bad.
"If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up and begin again."
hello teamliquid community! my name is chris, i am 19 years old and i live in southern orange county california. below is my story, bare with me please. i realize i am not the best storyteller.
when i was a little boy i always played army soldiers in my room. my mom says i would often spend hours setting them up and creating battlefields. i would always spend the little money i had on more and more of these toys until one day my parents decided to buy a computer for the family. my father wanted to buy me math games to further educate me but i insisted that i get the army toy soldier rts game. he wasnt too happy but he surprisingly bought it for me and now the picture of little chris wasnt setting up toysoldiers but commanding them virtually for hours upon end. one day i went over to my older cousins house and he was playing starcraft on his computer. the second i saw the game i became hooked and i spent hours watching the game and taking turns with my cousins/brothers. eventually i got a copy and played but i was never that good and i became frustrated with myself to the point where i would just watch the great names battle it out. i wished i had half the skill they possessed.
as time passed i was a freshmen in highschool and a running back on the jv football team. i was dedicated to football and fitness and starcraft naturally made its way to a box underneath my bed never to be touched. as the years go on, i end up being a star player on the football team leading the division on defense and carrying our team to the playoffs. but one day during the season i overhear kids talking about a starcraft 2 beta and the first thing i did was go home and research it. luckily i got a key and i began to play. i was instantly hooked once again and all my childhood experiences rushed into my head. i felt that same feeling i did when i would watch my older cousin play. soon after i got the beta, i began to tune into streams and vods listening to the great day9 and watching the best play. i became an addict, watching and playing as much as i could and as soon as football season ended all my time was spend on starcraft 2. a day came where i decided i wanted to take this game to the next level and go pro. i had heard of day9s countdown party and i immediatley got a ticket to go. i wanted to meet him and all the players of this great community! i wanted to talk to day9 and get some tips, some pointers, or anything to point me in the right direction.
when i got to the party i made sure i keep an eye out for sean and offcrouse my favorite terran at the time qxc! i had so much to say and i did say everything i wanted to! they were even better then i had imagined, the nicest people in the world and day9 even agreed to play some matches with me online to point me in the right direction. that night we watched the king of the hill beta tournament and i went home the happiest kid in the world knowing that starcraft 2 releases the next morning. so i got the game and instantly began to practice to become a pro and live my dreams. i spent as much time as i could everyday playing and staying at the top of my league crushing the diamond league and always holding that top 3 spot. i made sure i was watching streams and keeping up to date on the meta game day to day as i climbed the ranks. everything was going great when one day i began having horrible horrible wrist/arm pain. it was so bad that i couldnt even play for 30 minutes without feeling a extremely sharp and painful feeling throughout my arm. my doctor diagnosed me with rsi or repetetive stress injury and said i needed to stop playing this game. so i did.
it has been almost a year since my injury and i am still in the same position dealing with the same injury/symptoms. i have taken up to 2 months at a time without playing and i have tried so hard to recover but nothing seems to work. i am posting this message because i am lost in terms of what i should do. this game means everything to me and i love everything and everyone involved in it. i still am a mid master player only playing mybe an hour a week and i am always watching streams/major tournaments online. this game is my passion and i would do anything to be able to pursue my dream. i want to make a commitment to the community in my road to recovery!
RECOVERY PLAN
starting tomorrow october 26th 2011 i am going to begin my recovery plan. it will be about an 8 month plan to heal my arms/hands and begin my quest to go pro. i plan this around the release of hots. i have created a new healthy diet, increased excersise regimen, ice and heat therapy along with massage 3 times per week. to show you how dedicated i am i want to give you some numbers. i go to a community college and take 12 units per semester while working at a gas station for minimum wage making about 6 dollars an hour when its all said and done. i make 150 dollars per week and my therapy costs me 120. the other 30 goes torwards gas and food to get around. i will be working out and stretching religiously in order to recover my hands. and i will be avoiding the pc as much as possible.
guys, i realize i am in a bad spot. i am not even a pro and im investing all my time and resources into just being able to play a game. just to be able to try and go pro, obviously nothing is garunteed. my dad yells at me everyday i go to therapy and my mom is constantly complaining about my decisions but i dont care what people around me tell me and when someone tells me to just "quit that stupid game" i turn around and work 10 times harder. if anything, just know that i am in this to pursue my dreams and i will go a long way after i am tired to see this through. i look to tlo and that is a man who did not back down when things got tough..he overcame!
so i ask for your support and any advice you guys can give me. you guys have no idea how much this means to me. sometimes i feel like crying when i watch events like mlg and blizzcon because i am so happy and also soo very sad that i cant be there as well playing and competeting. but i am holding my tears for the day i become a champion!
"If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up and begin again."
it has been a year now that i have struggled with this pain(its hurts as i type this) and i am picking up a piece from my shaddered dream and starting over.
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Don't give up.
But give up posting in the starcraft general forum. This should be posted under blogs.
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ty! and im sorry for the mistake. can a mod change it for me please?
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You sound really motivated and actually capable of this. Go for it!
Remember, even if you fail, you will still have learned many useful things.
Good plan, really take advantage of HotS! Since the game will be a bit reset every expansion, you definitely have time. I think 6 months is a great date. No reason to try to rush your recovery.
Meanwhile you can always analyze pro replays and watch matches and practice things in your mind. That is, going through the thought process. If I'm in X situation, what do I do immediately? Am I remembering to make workers all the time? Etc. You can also use this time to create a good hotkey set up for you that is perfectly optimized. You can practice this in your head as well. Think about where to move your finger and/or what the key is for each kind of unit, and go through different situations like: "I'm gonna die to these mutas, press UFJSAL to make units and run SCVs away" etc. etc.
Keep at it, don't let go of your dream . If you let go, you will never know what could have happened, and you may regret it the rest of your stinking life. If you go for it and fail, at least you know you tried your best. And if you're not trying your best, you should have been trying harder if you really cared! If you fail, you will feel hurt. If you don't try, you will feel hurt. The only option for you is to try your best
GL HF
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good read i enjoyed it, Just stay passionate!
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thank you guys soo much! i really appreciate it. yoshi, those r really good tips actually. ill take note of what you said. nice to hear i have ways of improving without playing. and ya i am going to give this my 110 percent effort. i really want to get a chance to talk to tlo.. i know he has recovered well.
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Your determination is inspirational... if you've really got that much passion for sc2, then GO FOR IT.
I wish I could offer you advice, but I can't, so I'm just going to say that you sound like someone who won't give up, and if you won't give up then you can make it happen.
You've got my support man!
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I hope you are healed soon and wish you a speedy recovery. Update us on your progress maybe once a month or so, let us know if it's working.
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thank you guys! thank you for posting! i love this community and this game. you guys truly are awesome! i am going to give it my best!
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also feel free to skype me, pm me, or email me. i would love to hear advice from people. i have done research but there is always more i can learn. and the experience of people is priceless.
skype info: sc2spider email: spidersc2@yahoo.com
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Please please please please, for the sake of yourself and everyone involved with your life, spend a bit more time not playing sc2 and dedicating your life to it. The growth the e-sports and it's effects of blind sighting people to go pro without the right measures makes me sad. First off you have a very serious impediment into going pro. How many other professionals have rsi? Could be more, but from as far as I know, tlo has it and ever since, he's been struggling to make a name for himself in tournaments. He's a good player, but would be much much better if he could play as much as the other players do. It's holding him back big time, and it will for sure hold you back as well. In essence, you're trying to compete with the best, but you're starting behind (not already being pro) and your improvement rate is slower.
I would like to ask a few questions and hope you ponder them honestly and thoughtfully. If this is already your goal(to pursue being a professional) would you be happy being a complete failure? If you couldn't make it out of the open bracket of an MLG a year and a half from now, would you be content? If you can't get a sponsor, can't be picked up by a team that pays you, don't get enough viewers on your stream to make a living, etc, do you have a back up plan?
One of my greatest joys in life comes from seeing people fulfill for passions and succeed. However one of my greatest pains comes from seeing people face serious situations and refuse to make decisions objectively because they're blinded.
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On October 26 2011 12:02 phiinix wrote: Please please please please, for the sake of yourself and everyone involved with your life, spend a bit more time not playing sc2 and dedicating your life to it. The growth the e-sports and it's effects of blind sighting people to go pro without the right measures makes me sad. First off you have a very serious impediment into going pro. How many other professionals have rsi? Could be more, but from as far as I know, tlo has it and ever since, he's been struggling to make a name for himself in tournaments. He's a good player, but would be much much better if he could play as much as the other players do. It's holding him back big time, and it will for sure hold you back as well. In essence, you're trying to compete with the best, but you're starting behind (not already being pro) and your improvement rate is slower.
I would like to ask a few questions and hope you ponder them honestly and thoughtfully. If this is already your goal(to pursue being a professional) would you be happy being a complete failure? If you couldn't make it out of the open bracket of an MLG a year and a half from now, would you be content? If you can't get a sponsor, can't be picked up by a team that pays you, don't get enough viewers on your stream to make a living, etc, do you have a back up plan?
One of my greatest joys in life comes from seeing people fulfill for passions and succeed. However one of my greatest pains comes from seeing people face serious situations and refuse to make decisions objectively because they're blinded.
no, i would not be happy being a complete failure. and no i would be heart broken to not overcome the open bracket a 1.5 years from now. and no i wouldn't have a back up plan. i know, i have thought these same things before as well. i face a very very very difficult road ahead and u are right in everything you said. but i will tell you this...Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go. i cannot live with myself without giving my all torward this dream. i have been in this state of pain for 1 year now trying to put this game, this dream, behind me. but i cannot. it is something that i must do
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16927 Posts
On October 26 2011 12:11 Sp1der wrote:Show nested quote +On October 26 2011 12:02 phiinix wrote: Please please please please, for the sake of yourself and everyone involved with your life, spend a bit more time not playing sc2 and dedicating your life to it. The growth the e-sports and it's effects of blind sighting people to go pro without the right measures makes me sad. First off you have a very serious impediment into going pro. How many other professionals have rsi? Could be more, but from as far as I know, tlo has it and ever since, he's been struggling to make a name for himself in tournaments. He's a good player, but would be much much better if he could play as much as the other players do. It's holding him back big time, and it will for sure hold you back as well. In essence, you're trying to compete with the best, but you're starting behind (not already being pro) and your improvement rate is slower.
I would like to ask a few questions and hope you ponder them honestly and thoughtfully. If this is already your goal(to pursue being a professional) would you be happy being a complete failure? If you couldn't make it out of the open bracket of an MLG a year and a half from now, would you be content? If you can't get a sponsor, can't be picked up by a team that pays you, don't get enough viewers on your stream to make a living, etc, do you have a back up plan?
One of my greatest joys in life comes from seeing people fulfill for passions and succeed. However one of my greatest pains comes from seeing people face serious situations and refuse to make decisions objectively because they're blinded.
no, i would not be happy being a complete failure. and no i would be heart broken to not overcome the open bracket a 1.5 years from now. and no i wouldn't have a back up plan. i know, i have thought these same things before as well. i face a very very very difficult road ahead and u are right in everything you said. but i will tell you this... Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go. i cannot live with myself without giving my all torward this dream. i have been in this state of pain for 1 year now trying to put this game, this dream, behind me. but i cannot. it is something that i must do
There's a difference between perseverance and quixotism. Don't confuse one with the other.
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On October 26 2011 13:52 Empyrean wrote:Show nested quote +On October 26 2011 12:11 Sp1der wrote:On October 26 2011 12:02 phiinix wrote: Please please please please, for the sake of yourself and everyone involved with your life, spend a bit more time not playing sc2 and dedicating your life to it. The growth the e-sports and it's effects of blind sighting people to go pro without the right measures makes me sad. First off you have a very serious impediment into going pro. How many other professionals have rsi? Could be more, but from as far as I know, tlo has it and ever since, he's been struggling to make a name for himself in tournaments. He's a good player, but would be much much better if he could play as much as the other players do. It's holding him back big time, and it will for sure hold you back as well. In essence, you're trying to compete with the best, but you're starting behind (not already being pro) and your improvement rate is slower.
I would like to ask a few questions and hope you ponder them honestly and thoughtfully. If this is already your goal(to pursue being a professional) would you be happy being a complete failure? If you couldn't make it out of the open bracket of an MLG a year and a half from now, would you be content? If you can't get a sponsor, can't be picked up by a team that pays you, don't get enough viewers on your stream to make a living, etc, do you have a back up plan?
One of my greatest joys in life comes from seeing people fulfill for passions and succeed. However one of my greatest pains comes from seeing people face serious situations and refuse to make decisions objectively because they're blinded.
no, i would not be happy being a complete failure. and no i would be heart broken to not overcome the open bracket a 1.5 years from now. and no i wouldn't have a back up plan. i know, i have thought these same things before as well. i face a very very very difficult road ahead and u are right in everything you said. but i will tell you this... Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go. i cannot live with myself without giving my all torward this dream. i have been in this state of pain for 1 year now trying to put this game, this dream, behind me. but i cannot. it is something that i must do There's a difference between perseverance and quixotism. Don't confuse one with the other.
so you say give it up?
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16927 Posts
Yes :/
EDIT: Obviously you could still play for fun or watch streams or whatever. I just think it's extremely foolish to attempt to "go pro" or anything along those lines.
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i c. ya i know i am being foolish. it just tough man, its hard to just give it up on this dream for me.
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These posts come up so often these days that I feel like I'm going to write my own blog about why it's a bad idea.. The problem is that A LOT of people say this is their dream, they would give up everything, they throw away their futures, and in fact a lot of people are going through the same thing(lobber and areshero). It's that people think that they are the most determined, the hardest worker, whatever, and don't acknowledge the fact that making the decision to go pro straight up in sc2 is in a lot of ways a more dangerous career choice than most sports. If you wanted to be a pro basketball player, there's actually a cap on how much time you can spend playing it. Physical sports have wear that shows much sooner. You can't play 7 hours of basketball day in and day out. You CAN play 10-12 hours of sc2 day in and day out. At potentially no gain. The reward at the end of the basketball road pays much greater as well.
Personally I agree with Empyrean, and I think it's incredibly stupid to do without a college degree or a paying backup job. But a true passion is a true passion.
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OMG Dont give up!! Follow your dreams,, always! In 80 years or so you are gonna be death and everything you've done in your life will become meaningless, so just follow your dreams and live the way makes you happy. And its really important that you try to explain this to the people that surround you.
When you are a professional i'll be your fan
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i understand what you guys are saying. but i dont want to hear negativity in this post. a tougher path creates a stronger warrior. so i will pray not for a lighter load but stronger shoulders. you can beleive what i say or not. it is your choice but i will back these words. and when i am a champion holding a mic from day9 i will make note of this thread...and you who are watching will remember me.
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You shouldn't even really be thinking about going pro at this point. You're simply not at the level to think about that. Play for fun, and see how much you improve. Once you start pushing high masters/low GM then you're in the position to seriously think about how much time you want to dedicate. Right now it shouldn't even be a question in your mind. Make a goal to hit Masters or something in your free time.
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i already am a mid master only playing 1 hour per week. if i wa dedicating 6 hours a day i would be up in high master or gm easily. but ya i agree, i need to focus on getting healed and then getting my skill way up.
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I expect no less than first place then. I'll be waiting.
I'm midmasters and I've played 6 games in the past month.
Notice how both of our statements don't say much about the past.
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How old are you? Keep studying!~~~ SCII should be a hobby, not your life.
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I'm sorry, but you're an idiot if you think going pro at SC2 is still a good idea after getting RSI. It can take years for an injury like that to fully heal, if it fully heals at all. Taking part in an activity which not only exacerbates the symptoms, but which was the original cause is unbelievably stupid.
And that's aside from the general stupidity of trying to go pro in the first place. Being good at a video game is your biggest dream? Come on. You could do so many bigger, better things if you tried. I'd say it's more likely that being a progamer is your easiest dream.
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phiinx, i talked alot about my past in my original post haha.
mizu, im 19 years old.
swede, why so angry? i understand your points and its obviously not something you would do and u do not have the same goals/dreams as me. i wouldnt expect u to understand.
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As disappointing as it would be to give up your one passion in life, I personally think it would be the wisest choice. Going pro almost always isn't even in the cards for the best of the master league, and you're trying to make the push with an enormous handicap.
It's absolutely essential to have dreams and to pursue them, but in my judgment this is a bridge too far. Even you admitted in your post that you would be devastated if you tried to make it as a pro and failed, and I don't think it would be unfair to say that failure is almost guaranteed with an infinitesimal chance of success. Is it worth the heartbreak you will certainly feel a couple of years from now to pursue this?
The most reasonable option, I'd say, would be to continue your studies and be on the lookout for something you really enjoy doing, but of course, everything is your choice. Just be certain that you will not regret your decisions.
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as long as you wont regret failing, go for it.
feel free to pm if you want encouragement. i did a similar thing with my life following my dreams in something with a small chance of success and am doing well right now.
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On October 27 2011 06:21 Sp1der wrote: phiinx, i talked alot about my past in my original post haha.
mizu, im 19 years old.
swede, why so angry? i understand your points and its obviously not something you would do and u do not have the same goals/dreams as me. i wouldnt expect u to understand.
I completely understand. Not only do I have a wrist injury which prevents me from playing, I am also of the ability where I could conceivably 'go pro' if I spent all my time on it. What prevents me from doing that is: A) it's a selfish, non-contributing lifestyle. You add nothing to society and your goal of self-betterment is completely egotistical. B) it's the easy way out. This might sound weird, but the truth is that sitting at home playing SC2 all day under the guise of 'going pro' is an easy way of avoiding the real world for an indefinite amount of time. It requires almost no character development, no stressful interactions with the real world etc. It's a great way to feel like you're achieving without ever achieving. C) I know that at the end of my progaming career I would look back and realise how inconsequential it has all been. I would have a bunch of useless skills (since they only apply to one game), I might have had fleeting recognition in a game which at the end of the day doesn't matter at all, I'd have some superficial internet friendships based on nothing other than the game itself... Basically I would have nothing to show for it, materially or in terms of personal growth.
I could probably think of more reasons if I tried. I'm sorry if this comes off as harsh, but you need people to present criticisms of your ideas rather than just slapping you on the back and saying 'Good job!'. If at the end of the day you still decide to be a progamer in spite of all the 'haters' like myself, then hopefully it's because you took a well-reasoned look at what they had to say and honestly disagreed with them.
By the way, I have no doubts that you could do it. I think anyone in Masters probably could with the right attitude and practice routine. My post is about whether you should do it. Drop this stubborn attitude: 'when someone tells me to just "quit that stupid game" i turn around and work 10 times harder' and think hard about it. You'll actually feel more confident in your choice if you can clearly consider peoples' criticisms and still conclude that being a progamer is the right choice. And if you can do that then I have complete confidence in your ability to succeed and I know that you'll have an awesome time trying to crack the game.
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Keep it pushing. If people hate on you, you're doing the right thing.
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Well, you have the right attitude to succeed. The question is, should you? While I think that it is right - no matter whether there is Starcraft or not - to heal your wrist at any cost, having tunnel vision on the "progamer" thing just sounds wrong. You love the game, I got that. But you don't have to be a player to be a part of this world. You said you are studying VODs and replays and stuff and learn while you can't play. Do it verbal and fraps it. Put it on Youtube. Get feedback. Keep as many doors open as possible - why not being the first professional coach in Starcraft, a caster or a commentator? Leading your own team, discovering talent and coaching them? Setting up small tournaments? There are so many possibilities in this day and age, don't get tunnel vision and see only the gaming part.
Also, being a progamer is not just about skill. Don't forget, in this business you are an entertainer. Think professional wrestling minus the fixed matches. You can only last if people see in your play something they never see anywhere else. However, if you just can't perform, there are so many different roles that need to be filled for this whole business to work. Not everybody can be a performer. Doesn't mean other people are unimportant, just take a look at Xeris.
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swede,would you have the same opinion of professional athletetes? or is it different because they are playing a teamsport and interacting with people? i mean, they dont seem to contribute to society in anyway based on what you said. if anything they get paid too much. but i have a hard time beleiving that this game is just a big waste of time with no meaning. esports is only just beginning and i think people like day9, tasteless, artosis, boxer etc.. are people who did make a difference and they are making it possible for people to play a game we love on a more professional level as a sport and a growing phenomenon. i think being a pro gamer is more then just sitting in your room all day by yourself and playing starcraft. its the events, interactions with fans, barcrafts, hard practice, teamwork with teamattes, and the passion that is driving the game to be so succesful.
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Conclusion of all the previous comments: Make the right choice, However, only make it when you analyze both sides in full detail and the right path is clear, not only to you, but to those who will support you as well. No support = No Profit Support=Profit.
First of all, before clicking that spoiler please clear your mind of negative thoughts in your head and accept what I have to say neutrally, rather than aggressively(with determination) going towards what you currently believe is right.
+ Show Spoiler + Ideas of my own: Make a T-chart and put "Going Pro" on one side and "Not going pro but considering another,safer approach" or "Healing without High Risk of further injury" etc. on the other side. List on each side the pros of going that way. Ask your friends and family for pros of each side as they see it, but request no cons of either. Finally, consider this: Your family and friends may not always be the nicest of people, but they do care for you, and they do want the best for you. Your family knows you for the entirety of your life and know more about you than even you know. Your mother watches you progress through life and notice that in your first post you say "my mom says i would often spend hours setting them up and creating battlefields." this alone shows that your mother knows more about you than you do. She remembers this and says this. When she gives you advice your past is always in her mind. She knows how you tackle situations and knows just how stubborn you really are. Your parents know of past mistakes both you and they have made. They don't want them repeated, and I don't think you do either. For all you know, your best friends may have once had this same thought about a favorite video game but chose not to follow this dream because they dreamt even bigger things they could do, something to impact the real world, not just the virtual world. Consider these words of which were made for you.
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Keep following your dreams, I love that quote at the top of your post. Also I found the part about you watching your cousin play hilarious.
I would recommend, however, seeing a doctor and getting a practical recovery plan created by a professional. This will help minimize your recovery time and maximize the probability of a full recovery. Also, if someone really bad happened to your arm, the sooner the problem is identified higher chances you can correct the problem.
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On October 27 2011 09:41 Sp1der wrote: swede,would you have the same opinion of professional athletetes? or is it different because they are playing a teamsport and interacting with people? i mean, they dont seem to contribute to society in anyway based on what you said. if anything they get paid too much. but i have a hard time beleiving that this game is just a big waste of time with no meaning. esports is only just beginning and i think people like day9, tasteless, artosis, boxer etc.. are people who did make a difference and they are making it possible for people to play a game we love on a more professional level as a sport and a growing phenomenon. i think being a pro gamer is more then just sitting in your room all day by yourself and playing starcraft. its the events, interactions with fans, barcrafts, hard practice, teamwork with teamattes, and the passion that is driving the game to be so succesful.
I feel exactly the same about professional athletes in reference them to being non-contributory (unless they're giving significant amounts to charity... which most aren't).
You probably see things differently than I do. I don't buy the modern philosophy that individual happiness should be the only goal. I really can't be bothered going into a lot of detail since that isn't what this thread is about.
But basically, yes, I think this game is just a big waste of time with no meaning. In my opinion its utility should extend no further than something to relax with in your spare time.
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GL! Hope you achieve your dreams ^_^!
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On October 27 2011 10:36 tryummm wrote: Keep following your dreams, I love that quote at the top of your post. Also I found the part about you watching your cousin play hilarious.
I would recommend, however, seeing a doctor and getting a practical recovery plan created by a professional. This will help minimize your recovery time and maximize the probability of a full recovery. Also, if someone really bad happened to your arm, the sooner the problem is identified higher chances you can correct the problem.
haha ty! and ya i am working on it with my therapist 4 sure
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On October 27 2011 12:34 Swede wrote:Show nested quote +On October 27 2011 09:41 Sp1der wrote: swede,would you have the same opinion of professional athletetes? or is it different because they are playing a teamsport and interacting with people? i mean, they dont seem to contribute to society in anyway based on what you said. if anything they get paid too much. but i have a hard time beleiving that this game is just a big waste of time with no meaning. esports is only just beginning and i think people like day9, tasteless, artosis, boxer etc.. are people who did make a difference and they are making it possible for people to play a game we love on a more professional level as a sport and a growing phenomenon. i think being a pro gamer is more then just sitting in your room all day by yourself and playing starcraft. its the events, interactions with fans, barcrafts, hard practice, teamwork with teamattes, and the passion that is driving the game to be so succesful. I feel exactly the same about professional athletes in reference them to being non-contributory (unless they're giving significant amounts to charity... which most aren't). You probably see things differently than I do. I don't buy the modern philosophy that individual happiness should be the only goal. I really can't be bothered going into a lot of detail since that isn't what this thread is about. But basically, yes, I think this game is just a big waste of time with no meaning. In my opinion its utility should extend no further than something to relax with in your spare time.
ya we have different opinions but ive heard your arguement before. alot of people in my family feel the same way you do. i disagree with them but i understand where they are coming from.
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On October 27 2011 14:41 0123456789 wrote: GL! Hope you achieve your dreams ^_^!
thanks man!
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On October 27 2011 09:37 Celial wrote: Well, you have the right attitude to succeed. The question is, should you? While I think that it is right - no matter whether there is Starcraft or not - to heal your wrist at any cost, having tunnel vision on the "progamer" thing just sounds wrong. You love the game, I got that. But you don't have to be a player to be a part of this world. You said you are studying VODs and replays and stuff and learn while you can't play. Do it verbal and fraps it. Put it on Youtube. Get feedback. Keep as many doors open as possible - why not being the first professional coach in Starcraft, a caster or a commentator? Leading your own team, discovering talent and coaching them? Setting up small tournaments? There are so many possibilities in this day and age, don't get tunnel vision and see only the gaming part.
Also, being a progamer is not just about skill. Don't forget, in this business you are an entertainer. Think professional wrestling minus the fixed matches. You can only last if people see in your play something they never see anywhere else. However, if you just can't perform, there are so many different roles that need to be filled for this whole business to work. Not everybody can be a performer. Doesn't mean other people are unimportant, just take a look at Xeris.
i like the idea of streaming my study time and doing it verbal. ill propably start doing that when my hands feel strong. (maybe 2 months or so)
update: i have been icing and heating 2 times a day and stretching a ton. im starting to feel progress in flexibility. pain is still there but it is getting better everyday. i am going to doctor tomorrow for check up and maybe some anti-immflamatory medication. interested to hear what doc has to say, will let you guys know.
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hands r improving very very slowly but the important thing is they r improving.
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currently getting 2 deep tissue massages per week. very costly but it is helping a lot
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scheduled 2 sessions of massage and 1 session acupuncture this week. things r not going as well as i had hoped but im still staying strong.
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hands r improving slowly.. i received a book in the mail about rsi and i am reading it now. taking a break from massages and therapy. will be back in new year.
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had a tough week. i have been struggling. mri results are in on wednesday...im kinda worried because they only did mri on my neck and spine..i think they should have done it on the elbow,hands, wrist, and forearm as well. still keeping my head up!
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United States10327 Posts
good luck on the recovery!
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okay so i got x-ray and mri. i apparently do not have a curve in my neck. it is completely straight which is putting too much pressure on the nerves and causing fatigue, pain, tightness etc.. throughout my shoulders,arms, and hands/fingers. luckily, my cousin is a chiropractor and is willing to do therapy 3 times per week with me for free. i have a condition called vertebrae subluxation complex.
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increased hours at work as a cashier. altho it hurts my hands more i need more money for therapy. i am currently doing acupuncture 3x per week and massage 1x per week. my cousin is a chiropractor and he is adjusting me for free. pain has gone down but muscle tighness is still bad.
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im working for 3 more weeks in order to save enough money for my 2 month program. after 3 weeks i am taking a break from work for 2 months. during those two months i will be getting massage, working out, stretching,praying/reading my bible and eating a balanced diet. totally changing my lifestyle. i really want to get back in shape soon and try to become part of team razers academy that mr.bitter revealed in a youtube video.
link video.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N0FOyN30rsQ
once i am recovered(god willing) by summer time, i will begin training. thank you everyone for supporting me!
i am thinking about not also blogging my journey but possibly putting it on video and maybe sharing my story and what my day consists of through youtube or something....any thoughts/suggestions/ideas?
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I'm with the nay-sayers. If you had some great talent for RTS, those 6-8 hours a day would've taken you well past mid-masters. Better to play the game for fun (even if you still play a lot!) and begin to consider going pro only when you're consistently beating very good players. Overworking and injuring yourself will have very negative long-term impacts.
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Masters league didn't exist until early 2011, so that's after his injury. Top 3 diamond in november/december 2010 was the business back then.
Also, just to add my support to you Sp1der ^^ hope it all starts working out for you soon!
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Good luck man, I hope you recover quickly.
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Holy shit, now you're not the one admiring people, but rather the one being admired. :D
I hope to see you get somewhere at a major tournament. You definitely sound like you have the correct mindset to achieve a pro gaming career in SC2. Wish you the best of luck!
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thank you guys! really really apprciate the support! it truly means alot to me! @pigmanbear- i see your point but i never really got a chance to practice and give it my best shot. i was mid master after the injury..only playing a couple games per week. so now im doing my best to recover and take my practice very seriously. i think its a tough goal and im not saying it will be easy. i understand that i could just be talking the talk and not actually giving this my all. but i assure you, i am trying my best! if it is gods will(i am a christian) then i will succeed but i cannot just fold my hands and hope it happens. i need to step out in faith and go for it! through gods strength.
im really interested in doing some videos of myself as i recover but im not sure what to do exactly....
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Good luck man! Rooting for you =o
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I think what you're doing is excellent and wish you all the best.
A few thoughts pop to mind when I hear your story. I have a lot of questions below and not a lot of answers. The answers are yours to find, not mine to give (nor am I qualified to give them)...
Money aside, what does your weekly medical / management routine look like? Obviously you have a chiro and masseuse and some sort of specialist floating around given that you've had an MRI, plus a shrink in the wings.
Are there ways you can improve on this? Do you need more medical support? At a glance you could need to see a neurologist, rheumatologist, occupational therapist, someone specialising in sports medicine, physiotherapist etc... Do you need less medical support? Are the physicians you're seeing skilled or are they just doing the job and that's about it? If they're not meeting your needs, are you doing enough to source new ones? Do you have your desk ergonomically set up? ie. lowerable, foot rest, keyboard and wrist pads, adjustable screen.
And maybe most importantly, have you had a chance to talk to TLO? His insights would eclipse some of the opinions here. Taking advice from people who are successful at their craft will pay off more than taking it from every Tom, Dick and Harry. FWIW my experience is in psychology but I've been around a tonne of doctors and specialists for the last few years due to family illness, but in no way do I profess to be an expert on this topic.
I'm guessing a lot of the above you've already considered, but if not, I hope there is 1or 2 quality questions in there that might help you on a bit.
I'd wish you luck, but you don't need that. Kick some ass mate!
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@ pongo- well, i have been to my family doctor, neurologist, rheumotologist, chiropractor(my cousin), physical therapist, hand theapist, and i have had my blood, mri, and x-ray taken. very expensive over the last year but my parents let me use their insurance to help me so i can afford the bills. its been tough paying for all this but im hanging in their ever so slightly. the next few months will be the most expensive as i have therapy/massage 3-4 times per week.i have been working 40 hours per week so when i take a 2 month break from work(april and may) i will have money to use for therapy. out of all this i am still currently seeing the masseuse, chirpopractor, and physical therapist. my plan with this routine is to use chirporactic to eliminate subluxations in the spine/neck, use massage to remove trigger points/tight muscles/increase blood flow/increase flexibility, and i am using the physical therapy to strengthen my body. this coupled with a good stretching program and improved ergonomics(like u mentioned). i am currently trying multiple different therapists and masseuses to see who is willing to really help me. i still feel like i need to find better people. i got a better chair with no arm rests, i cut my desk 3 inches from the bottom to make it ergonomically fit under my arms, i got a better keyboard, and put books under my monitor. i have had a chance to talk to tlo over pm and he helped me alot. he instructed me to change my sleeping habits, start swimming/stretching, and he told me to go to masseuse very consistently. i really wanted to talk to him over skype and get a chance to realy dissect his brain but i dont want to bother him..maybe i should test my luck eh?
one a side note pongo, you mentioned your experience is in psychology? are you a psychologist? because i know i tense up alot when my games get intense(tlo had same problem) which puts more unecessary stress on my body. can u adress that in any way?
thanks for the kind words my friend! i appreciate the post.
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Don't give up sir; you're still young. If you give up now you will wonder if you could have made it for the rest of your life -eternal regret. If you go for it and fail at least you can move on to something else without regret.
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On March 15 2012 01:10 Demicore wrote: Don't give up sir; you're still young. If you give up now you will wonder if you could have made it for the rest of your life -eternal regret. If you go for it and fail at least you can move on to something else without regret.
ya this is too true ^^ im giving it my best shot! thank you for the kind words my friend!
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back from physical therapy. got some really great stretches for my median nerve which is really really tight around the bicep and upper forearm.
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Good luck Very inspiring post!
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tl;dr: There's things you can do at a psychological level to help reduce tension during 'big' game moments.
You sound like Kerrigan describes Raynor in BW - tenacious. It sounds like you're on a good path. Keep working with your Docs and trusting your instincts.
It's such a sh!t to hear Americans talk about health care and cost, almost all of the things you're getting are free or subsidised for Aussies, such a bummer.
I'm not a psychologist but am on my way. After life forced a detour, I'm finishing my honours, so I've got a couple of years left before I hang the shingle. I've been fortunate (or unfortunate depending on how you look at it) enough to have had a reasonable amount of exposure to our hospital and medical system and know a few folk going through similar issues to yourself. That said any advice I give is confined to my personal experience or drawn from my studies as opposed to that of a practicing shrink. I know that sounds legalised, but I'd get my ass kicked if I somehow gave the impression that I'm a shrink.
So to finally answer your question, first up it may be worth consulting a sports psychologist as opposed to a clinical or counselling psych (I'm not sure on registrations or classifications in the US, but that's what we call them here). It may be something you discuss with your current mental health physician.
So sports psychs work specifically with maximising performance in competitive environments. They develop the certain skills to help someone kick that goal more often, help them grind through the last leg of a marathon etc etc... For you I'd imagine there are two things you'd be focusing on (and I'm guessing you've already touched on them with your docs):
1. The psychological effect of dealing with your condition, it is in effect a disability and
2. Game stuff, be it game day or training.
At a guess (remembering my qualifying statement above... :-p) I would say the tension you're feeling comes from two places:
1. You're required to increase your repetitive movements when battle starts, that is APM goes up, so the raft of issues you get with RSI are going to be super evident here, what that means for you, I don't know. And
2. I suspect you're having what they call a 'fight or flight' response. It's the kind of thing that happens when you see a snake or someone pulls a knife on you. Your pulse increases, your breathing changes, your muscles tighten. You make a decision 'do I run (flight)?' or 'do I stand my ground (fight)?' Flight and fight have their own physiological responses that come with them.
A fight response is designed to get you through a threatening situation by gearing your body physically towards survival (theory wise its built of the back of that survival of the fittest Darwinian stuff). Off the top of my head, a fight response results in endorphins being released, digestion slowing etc etc...
This response is automatic, that is, you don't control it. Think about it, someone jumps out from behind a corner and yells 'boo!' you can't help but nearly sh!t yourself. However, I think you may well be able to train yourself to react differently. Using the same example, if this person jumped out from the same place everytime, you would probably get used to it (exposure therapy). Maybe your heart skips a beat, but maybe you don't get the shakes and take five minutes to calm down.
I would suggest that this theory would apply to the tension you feel in those big moments in a game. So, how do you condition for it?
. Firstly, consult your psych, remember I'm not a psych. Nonetheless here are some things that might help (they may also hinder as you don't want to be too relaxed or worsen your RSU, which is why it's important you take your psychs advice not mine).
. Controlled breathing techniques may help reduce the stress reaction your having. This may work psychologically and physically
. Exposure therapy (a bit like they do with phobias) may help desensitise you to these moments in game. We have a star forward here who practices his goal kicking whilst his i-pod plays the sound of a crowd cheering a booing, same concept.
. Hypnotherapy may help too. I'm not talking the type done with a fob watch. Real hypnotherapy is something that you train yourself into with lots of practice. You could develop a trigger word you say to yourself that reduces muscular tension. I've known of people who have conditioned themselves to orgasm on command in order to get an endorphin rush during a game, it was part of a controlled study, mind out of the gutter people.
So there are some thoughts. As you can see they're all quite different, but all focused on reducing a reaction you presently can't control. There's probably more you can do but I've waffled on long enough. I hope some of this helps. GLHF
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@pongo- fantastic advice! that actually makes alot of sense as i noticed my hearbeat increases with my muscle tension in big moments. for example, if im at base macroing and i send my units through the mini-map only to realize banelings rolling on creep and i have to split stim asap..things like that force a tensed reaction from me physcially and emotionally. i feel part of it comes from my competitiveness as well. im so hard on myself. thank you for the advice pongo, i will do my best to apply your advice. i really get encouraged from posts like the one you made. i will do my best to recover, train hard, and pursue a career as a pro gamer. i want to honor god and glorify god through my efforts as i am a christian. i cannot do this without the lord and my injury has humbled me in many ways.
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You're welcome Sp1der, I hope things work out. Just remember, discuss any changes you're thinking of making with your physicians. You don't want to do more harm than good. Best of luck.
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ya for sure i will try and do everything through the professionals
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hey everyone, i will be creating a video for the razer academy. any ideas/suggestions? pm me if u have some good ideas
thanks
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update: i got in contact with the author of the book "its not carpell tunnel syndrome". she is actually a therapist in PA and she agreed to do a session evaluation with me over skype to help pinpoint the issue. im hoping she can give me some valuable advice. ill keep you guys posted. oh ya, yesterday was my bday! i got some money sent to me from relatives all over the place which is really going to help me pay for therapy. really blessed for that!
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Fuck that be realistic. You should never put all your eggs in one basket.
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On March 18 2012 03:22 THE_DOMINATOR wrote: Fuck that be realistic. You should never put all your eggs in one basket.
In 207 BC, General Xiang advanced the small Chu army towards Julu to wage war against the huge Qin army. After crossing the river, he had his troops burn the ships and destroy all but 3 days of supplies, which successfully eliminated any chance of retreat.
Since the Chu army of 30,000 was about to fight the Qin Army of 300,000, you might think Xiang was crazy. However, the results tell a different story. Xiang’s army won nine consecutive battles, and then opposing Qin army surrendered.
What happened here? The theory is, since the Chu army had no other option, they had to win and their fighting demonstrated it. In other words, they put all their eggs in one basket and watched that basket.
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hey guys! just finished a 1 hour consultation session with a therapist in PA over skype video haha. she specializes in rsi. i have so many notes taken its ridiculous and i also have a new stretching program! will follow this to my absolute best ability!
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mom went to bible study and a lady suggested i see some natural doctor. he wants to change/control my diet for a couple months and see how it improves my body. hes also doing some other tests, hopefully hes on to something!
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I was a musician for several years and had to quit b/c of rsi and other related issues. I know several other musicians who had the same thing happen to them. For most people with RSI and carpal, the problem will never go away. Things like stretching, therapy, and surgery can mitigate symptoms to some degree, but will almost never fix it.
I admire your dedication. You should be smart and apply it somewhere else.
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On March 25 2012 10:17 mynameisgreat11 wrote: I was a musician for several years and had to quit b/c of rsi and other related issues. I know several other musicians who had the same thing happen to them. For most people with RSI and carpal, the problem will never go away. Things like stretching, therapy, and surgery can mitigate symptoms to some degree, but will almost never fix it.
I admire your dedication. You should be smart and apply it somewhere else.
It’s how we are in our minds that make us how we are in our bodies. i will no longer look at this the wrong way. it is something that has happened. yes, its unfortunate. yes, i wish i could go back in time. but It had to happen, otherwise I would never have woken up. It couldn't have been any other way and if i cant overcome this then i don't deserve to be the champion i have set out to become.
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On March 25 2012 10:32 Sp1der wrote:Show nested quote +On March 25 2012 10:17 mynameisgreat11 wrote: I was a musician for several years and had to quit b/c of rsi and other related issues. I know several other musicians who had the same thing happen to them. For most people with RSI and carpal, the problem will never go away. Things like stretching, therapy, and surgery can mitigate symptoms to some degree, but will almost never fix it.
I admire your dedication. You should be smart and apply it somewhere else. It’s how we are in our minds that make us how we are in our bodies. i will no longer look at this the wrong way. it is something that has happened. yes, its unfortunate. yes, i wish i could go back in time. but It had to happen, otherwise I would never have woken up. It couldn't have been any other way and if i cant overcome this then i don't deserve to be the champion i have set out to become.
It is not in our minds that makes us how we are in our bodies. Reality and what you dream are different. Dreams don't always come true. You can maximize happiness if you are realistic.
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On March 25 2012 10:54 mynameisgreat11 wrote:Show nested quote +On March 25 2012 10:32 Sp1der wrote:On March 25 2012 10:17 mynameisgreat11 wrote: I was a musician for several years and had to quit b/c of rsi and other related issues. I know several other musicians who had the same thing happen to them. For most people with RSI and carpal, the problem will never go away. Things like stretching, therapy, and surgery can mitigate symptoms to some degree, but will almost never fix it.
I admire your dedication. You should be smart and apply it somewhere else. It’s how we are in our minds that make us how we are in our bodies. i will no longer look at this the wrong way. it is something that has happened. yes, its unfortunate. yes, i wish i could go back in time. but It had to happen, otherwise I would never have woken up. It couldn't have been any other way and if i cant overcome this then i don't deserve to be the champion i have set out to become. It is not in our minds that makes us how we are in our bodies. Reality and what you dream are different. Dreams don't always come true. You can maximize happiness if you are realistic.
i don't want to be "realistic" just yet. i dont want to look back on my life 10 years from now and say "man, i wonder what would have happened if i gave it my all". we only live once and i will not throw away my "dream" because of an obstacle in my path. its not like this is something i will strive for in a perpetual state until i die lol. this is something im trying to understand and overcome and just because i don't get results overnight doesn't mean i am not getting closer to my goal. it took Thomas Edison 10,000 failed attempts before he successfully invented the light bulb. what if he gave up at the 9,999th try?
i understand your point clearly. it makes sense and its the wise decision. i don't really want to argue because i cant really win lol...and i know it. its just something i want to do(its hard to explain).
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Sigh... as a younging I had the exact same dream about warcraft 3 and I loved the game, I dedicated 8 hours a day for many years and moved schools, when I did that I realised "Why should I stress out about this game? " " Why am I putting all my effort into this game and neglecting everything around me ". You can try go pro but dont burn all your bridges brother. Many pros go pro without dedicating full time.
EDIT: Why not dedicate time to creating a starcraft based show? That way if you got good enough you could still go to events ect and once your hands heal you have a name and (hopefully) an income, that would make it easier for you to achieve your dream if you were set on it.
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On March 30 2012 15:45 ScruffyJanitor wrote: Sigh... as a younging I had the exact same dream about warcraft 3 and I loved the game, I dedicated 8 hours a day for many years and moved schools, when I did that I realised "Why should I stress out about this game? " " Why am I putting all my effort into this game and neglecting everything around me ". You can try go pro but dont burn all your bridges brother. Many pros go pro without dedicating full time.
EDIT: Why not dedicate time to creating a starcraft based show? That way if you got good enough you could still go to events ect and once your hands heal you have a name and (hopefully) an income, that would make it easier for you to achieve your dream if you were set on it.
mhm pretty darn good point. theres no rush really..im pretty young and sc2 still has a long life ahead of it.
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increasing massage per week to 4x. (for 2 months b/c finally saved up enough money). ill be going to mlg Anaheim as well!
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