THE CULT OF THE BLOCKCHAIN
I've notice you have people who are really strongly opinionated in this space, like some people are just for Bitcoin and fuck everything else, and others are just talking about blockchain and/or Ethereum and/or ICOs and everyone is obsessed one way or another. But after reading Satoshi's white paper again, I think that it really grounded me from the hype of it all. Frankly the guys I had met were so sick of meeting new people getting into this space without any real commitment to the space; I felt like it was an interview for joining a cult where they don't want you. lol.
NETFLIX AND MARCO POLO
I just joined netflix, more for the family but there was this documentary I wanted to watch and the offer was discounted and good. But I wanted to say, there was this series that has been panned by reviewers but appreciated by fans, Marco Polo. And I was impressed. I can see why it was panned by critics, because I think it's one of the first mainstream western audience facing dramas where the Asian men are actually acting like real men. Which is so not the norm for western facing dramas. I was surprised and I liked it, first time I watched a western drama like that.i.e. Asian men being men and in the fore front.
THE NATIVE MAN
And what I mean is that, when you watch Korean or Japanese movies it's for the native audience, you see men who are simply men as they are in their own society. There is no question who is the lead, there is no discussion about that these actors are not represented properly, because, hell, everyone is Korean or Japanese in this films and you can't find even another ethnic type at all (unless they go somewhere international). But I think for a lot of Asian American's there is no 'Asian American Male identity'. I've seen that to when I'm in the west. Frankly, a lot of young Korean American men, they don't know what it means to be a Korean man until they spend some time in Korea and understand that identity -not as an immigrant or a minority, but as simply a man where they are expected to take the lead role in their society.
Sorry if I'm not more clear on it, but the best example I can give is when I'm in Canada or the US or England, it doesn't matter, I'm a man, but in the way a Korean would understand it. Sometimes it causes issues, cause of the cultural differences, but I'm not trying to define myself in relation to other men and whatever their perceptions are, I am simply being who I am. Whereas I feel like Asian American men simply (1) don't have a clear or developed identity of what does it mean to be a man because if they are like a 'white WASP man' then it would look like they were being fake or not Asian American and (2), they never have a chance to develop it for themselves because they are defining themselves in a reactionary way to the mainstream identity of what that western society defines as man - they don't allow themselves to have a white 'man's' masculinity, but also don't have an alternative, -simply being reactionary is just saying I'm not THAT kind of man, but then what kind of man are they? That being said, I do feel and feel aware that I do feel some alpha pressure in certain situations that does make me purposely/consciously be more 'manly' when I feel that pressure.
I was educated and raised in the west for most of schooling (not all, but a lot), but my work experience was totally in Korea, and do a lot of business all over the world, but for me, it's different when you're in Canada, US and England. In Switzerland or France or Austria; I don't feel any need to force my manly identity in the room, this way I feel people are more at ease with international contact. But when I'm in England, I'm really the most either polite or either most obnoxious person in the room depending on the crowd.
I'm not faking it, but I'm kinda forced to counter overt strong masculine displays of aggression and simply put, as usually the only Asian/Korean guy in the room, I am an easy target to be excluded or singled out as the object of showing how manly some guys are in first group encounters. So I either show a very reserved front, but firm and generally silent but aware- or -I basically show em a side of Asia they've never seen before when I take out the filters and just proceed to drink like a mofo, and be brutally honest in calling out someone if they're being a dick or a pussy (well I'm sure this a more a Korean trait when we don't like people and don't mind to publicly express our minds to look to cause trouble, especially when drinking).
I LIKE EASTERN EUROPE
Funny thing is though in Eastern Europe, the cultural effect/trauma that Genghis Khan inflicted and the fact that Koreans are known to drink a lot in Russia/CIS countries, is that when they see a big Korean boy like me, at the first sign of aggressive behavior from me, they expect me to start going Genghis Khan on them. So there was so much respect in those countries that they don't challenge me to make themselves look more dominate or manly as they do in the Anglo west. In fact, they love it when I start drinking and acting aggressive lol. Lots of fun in Eastern Europe lol.
But going back to the point of being either polite or overly obnoxious, when I'm in Asia or Europe, I don't need to ever think, 'oh boy, here we go, lets see which stupid cunt tries to make a small dick joke and pass it off like they are being charming or which guy purposely interrupts a conversation I am having just because he thinks he can and I'm a non entity'. Rather in Europe or Asia I don't prepare myself, I just go in as I am, which I never get away with that in the Anglo west -including Australia as well. (btw in both cases, I just call them out on it right away, like, 'wow, dicks must be on your mind a lot eh? I guess you're a faggot.' or, 'sorry, who the fuck are you, thanks' and usually if they are cool, it turns into banter, if not, then I'm always ready to take it to the next level, - keeping in mind that these are usually industry conferences and usually crass affairs anyway)
But anyway-s- if you haven't seen Marco polo, then MightyAtom gives it 2 thumbs up!
A GOOD NIGHTS SLEEP
I finally got things sorted out financially. With a family and kids, it's hard to take risks and it's nice to be able to sleep at night without a biting anxiety of not having taken care of the responsibility for your family as the very first priority. I took the risk to be an entrepreneur because of ego and that I wanted to prove that I was the best in my field and that being an entrepreneur is something I had to learn. Of course I justified it that in the long term it would be better for the family... but now, when the boys are in grade school, it's not a risk I would ever take again from scratch.
I mean I'm doing a new project, but now that project is backed by a solid financial base, so I'm not worried about providing for them now, just focused on getting the project done. But before I felt so guilty that I was so selfish and arrogant to think that I was just going to immediately figure it out and that being an entrepreneur was a simple thing to just figure out and execute. So when I first jumped into it, I wasn't prepared at all, I didn't set enough savings aside, not enough funding, not enough right people, not a strong team, just me being an executive and setting the plan and making people try to execute it- which is not what you want. As I mentioned before, you want a team like a family who is really going to look out for each other and the success of the team. But I've had a really good night's rest in the last few days and yes, I've managed to lone wolf finish the business docs, even though it was a week late lol, but its a solid document.
Ok, things start in full throttle in a week's time, so I may go missing for sometime, so I wanted to write on TL before I go missing, but you know, I always come back home.