I hate you. I hate that it is so difficult for me to be with you. I hate the sad people whos lives are so pathetic that they have to spend their time ruining other people's lives. I wish them all a slow painfull death. I hate that I fell for you, because it hurts to think that I'm not gonna hold you and lay with you and share childish jokes or talk nose to nose while looking into each other eyes. I'm sad because I don't fall in love easily and when I for once do it's so damn hard.
I hate the society because you did this to me. Burn to ashes, world.
I hate everything that reminds me of you. I hate that when I see you again my heart is gonna skip a beat and you are gonna be nice to me. I hate that i'm gonna go around hoping for something that isnt. I hate that when I close my eyes you are the first thing waiting behind my eyelids. I hate that I opened myself for the first time since I can't even remember. I hate that I told everybody how I felt without restriction. I hate that I'm gonna cry again. I hate the thought of meeting someone else. I hate that I'm gonna forget and try all over again.
I hate the sympathy. I hate that instead of mocking and poking fun at me you are now all silent and talking behind me instead. I never cared what you thought, losers. I pity you because you will never dare to live. I hate how effortlessly you can change my world. I hate how you never try to game me yet do it at every turn. I hate how I'm still here writing about my feelings. I hate how I'm gonna go walking in the rain. I hate how I feel like a kicked puppy. I hate how I can't let go when I'm talking to you. I hate being powerless.
But most of all I hate that I don't hate you. That if I had the choice I would do everything over again. That despite you telling me that you can't I'm still hoping and trying to find a way. That I'm still putting myself out there. I hate that you are everything I want and that I can't have you. I hate myself.
This is me back in April of last year . And i'm still trying to find a way to get together again, I suck. One thing, whatever you do, don't start talking friendly with her again, or you'll never be able to get over her (serioulsy, I started talking to my ex on msn and now i can't get her off my mind, and she doesn't really care about me any more).
it was a little too hollywood speech for me tbh, but I sympathize with the sentiment...the next step is to outgrow the pangs and pains. Longing for a partner back is just like wishing you still had a toy. Humans are the most developed toys we have in the world, and part of what makes them so interesting and amusing is that they don't have to give us their attention. If you can view humans as toys, you tend to realise, almost comically, that you are actually whining like a baby who wants his rattle back; and I find it tends to become easier to deal with heartache that way- you can get over not having a toy, right?!
I win like Lance Armstrong in tour de France, I win like Michael Schumacher in a red Ferrari or like Roger Federer on a tennis court. I win like a guy who fell for a girl, refused to give up and one day found himself laying with her on the grass in the sun. I win like a guy who had fantastic sex with the girl he fell head over heals for.
On March 31 2008 02:24 HamerD wrote: it was a little too hollywood speech for me tbh, but I sympathize with the sentiment...the next step is to outgrow the pangs and pains. Longing for a partner back is just like wishing you still had a toy. Humans are the most developed toys we have in the world, and part of what makes them so interesting and amusing is that they don't have to give us their attention. If you can view humans as toys, you tend to realise, almost comically, that you are actually whining like a baby who wants his rattle back; and I find it tends to become easier to deal with heartache that way- you can get over not having a toy, right?!
Agree with this completely. Especially the first part. o.o