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I don't feel like I have friends

Forum Index > Blogs 1 2 3 All
 
 imjorman   United States. December 22 2011 15:23. Posts 580
Profile Blog # 
I don't really know what to write.

I don't feel like I have friends.

My girlfriend claims that I'm well liked and people enjoy my company, but I don't know. I feel like I'm more in people's "way" than anything.

Yeah this is a QQ blog but more so it's me just writing out my thoughts as I think of them so I can think a little about this.

I'm wildly successful by societies standards for being a 20 year old, but I still just wish I had like true friends.

Friends that were there for me no matter who I am and no matter what I do.

My girlfriend (hopefully future wife) is always supportive and never bails on me - even in the worst of times.

I have friends, though, that are only there when things look up or when I'm in a fantastic mood. I'm that guy, it seems, that is enjoyed only when it's "convenient." I don't have that one buddy that I can just ask to help share my burdens in life and talk things out with.

I do most of that through journaling (i.e. this blog).

I love places like Teamliquid because it gives me a since of belong. My "friends" in RL don't share my interests: they like skateboarding, football, and laying on the couch. I like games.

I just value you guys a lot on this site. I just wanted to let you all know that.

I don't know why I posted this blog, maybe to just get my thoughts out? Sorry for the bad grammar and perhaps spelling errors, I'm really just freewriting.

I don't need psychiatric help because I am entirely mentally stable, but I do need something. I do not know what it is.

I'm bad at meeting new people although I'm outgoing (I'm not, how would you say...a "looker").

Yeah I'm totally just like whining here....sorry. But hey, it's my blog right?

I just...how do you guys get over emotional humps like this? Like when your feeling down. Any tips on branching out into new friendships?

p.s. I have a great girlfriend who i can talk to, but when some things go wrong with her or we fight I wish I had someone else to bitch about it to lolol

***
You may say I'm a dreamer, but I am not the only one. - John Lennon
Old Post

 
 Erik.TheRed   United States. December 22 2011 15:30. Posts 1181
Profile Blog # 
try to meet up with local starcraft/esports fans! organize a barcraft, attend nearby tournaments, cheer for a CSL team, etc.

Unless you live out in the middle of nowhere, it shouldn't be hard to connect with other TL/esports fans in real life. And it will be easier not to be shy, because you will already have something in common with the guys you meet!
Last edit: 2011-12-22 15:30:30
|| Twitter @ErikTheRed19 || "See you Space Cowboy"
Old Post

 
 imjorman   United States. December 22 2011 15:32. Posts 580
Profile Blog # 

On December 22 2011 15:30 Erik.TheRed wrote:
try to meet up with local starcraft/esports fans! organize a barcraft, attend nearby tournaments, cheer for a CSL team, etc.

Unless you live out in the middle of nowhere, it shouldn't be hard to connect with other TL/esports fans in real life. And it will be easier not to be shy, because you will already have something in common with the guys you meet!


Thanks man

I appreciate your input and your right! I should look into doing something for the GSL in January near my hometown.
You may say I'm a dreamer, but I am not the only one. - John Lennon
Old Post

 
 Whole   United States. December 22 2011 15:38. Posts 4946
Profile Blog # 
I used to kind of be in a similar situation, but one day I just ranted a little to my best friend and it worked. Unless you don't have one/a few easily identifiable "best friends", just try doing a small scale rant (something that doesn't really matter) and see if he is interested. If he is, you can gradually build it up I suppose.
Manager of IdrA Fanclub and @GrackenNews (https://twitter.com/#!/GrackenNews)
Old Post

 
 imjorman   United States. December 22 2011 15:41. Posts 580
Profile Blog # 

On December 22 2011 15:38 Whole wrote:
I used to kind of be in a similar situation, but one day I just ranted a little to my best friend and it worked. Unless you don't have one/a few easily identifiable "best friends", just try doing a small scale rant (something that doesn't really matter) and see if he is interested. If he is, you can gradually build it up I suppose.


I'll try this. I mean I have people I hang with more than others, but like it's not I know i can go to him to confide or whatever. But your right, trying something on a small scale would be a good idea. Thanks
You may say I'm a dreamer, but I am not the only one. - John Lennon
Old Post

 
 Roe   Canada. December 22 2011 15:44. Posts 5136
Profile Blog # 
you've got a friend in TL

Old Post

 
 brachester   Australia. December 22 2011 15:45. Posts 1751
Profile Blog # 
sometimes i like to keep things to myself and think it through, i mean if you're really mentally stable then you don't need your friend's advice anyway, chances are they're only try to cheer you up instead of giving something really useful. About the "best friend" thing, don't try to force it, you can only naturally find one.
I hate all this singing
Old Post

  liberal   December 22 2011 15:51. Posts 1116Profile # 
Friends are overrated. I gave them up a long time ago.

I tried having a couple gamer friends. They would just sit at home all day and play their games. Sometimes we would play each other, but after I would win a couple times they would quit and go back to "playing with themselves."

Meh, I'm just over people, I don't like the vast majority of them. My wife is probably the only person in the world I enjoy being around. Content to be a hermit, so long as I have the internet.
Old Post

 
 imjorman   United States. December 22 2011 15:56. Posts 580
Profile Blog # 

On December 22 2011 15:44 Roe wrote:
you've got a friend in TL




ha made me smile. Thanks man :D
You may say I'm a dreamer, but I am not the only one. - John Lennon
Old Post

 
 imjorman   United States. December 22 2011 15:57. Posts 580
Profile Blog # 

On December 22 2011 15:45 brachester wrote:
sometimes i like to keep things to myself and think it through, i mean if you're really mentally stable then you don't need your friend's advice anyway, chances are they're only try to cheer you up instead of giving something really useful. About the "best friend" thing, don't try to force it, you can only naturally find one.


Man I wish TL had multiquote support ; /

But yeah this is the way I'm leaning. Like I don't need people; good logical thought and my future wife should do me fine.
You may say I'm a dreamer, but I am not the only one. - John Lennon
Old Post

 
 imjorman   United States. December 22 2011 15:59. Posts 580
Profile Blog # 

On December 22 2011 15:51 liberal wrote:
Friends are overrated. I gave them up a long time ago.

I tried having a couple gamer friends. They would just sit at home all day and play their games. Sometimes we would play each other, but after I would win a couple times they would quit and go back to "playing with themselves."

Meh, I'm just over people, I don't like the vast majority of them. My wife is probably the only person in the world I enjoy being around. Content to be a hermit, so long as I have the internet.


This is the way I'm leaning. I really think I'm getting ready to forsake people in the since of wanting meaningful long-lasting relationships. I would never forsake them in terms of letting humanity go die without me caring (not saying you siad that, I'm just elaborating) but I am ready to just say "I don't need people to make me happy". I just wanna focus on my future wife, my research (theology), and game (SC2).
You may say I'm a dreamer, but I am not the only one. - John Lennon
Old Post

 
 sc2effort   United States. December 22 2011 16:04. Posts 245
Profile Blog # 
great post, I feel a lot of people on here have similar problems.
the greatest stride for victory, the weakest stride for greatness
Old Post

 
 Brutaxilos   United States. December 22 2011 16:05. Posts 864
Profile Blog # 
eh im in a similar situation. my best friend (who was approaching becoming my girlfriend) and i got into an argument a few months back. we havent resolved it yet. even worse, it seems like all my other friends are either getting retarded or are so closed off with their other friends. lunchtime at school is so depressing now because i dont know where to sit. no matter where no body talks to me i dont even know what im doing wrong. if you wanna talk shoot me a PM. itl probably make me feel better as well.
Old Post

 
 imjorman   United States. December 22 2011 16:08. Posts 580
Profile Blog # 

On December 22 2011 16:04 sc2effort wrote:
great post, I feel a lot of people on here have similar problems.


Thank you. It's nice to have the support of people who share an interest in the same things I do. ya know?
You may say I'm a dreamer, but I am not the only one. - John Lennon
Old Post

 
 imjorman   United States. December 22 2011 16:08. Posts 580
Profile Blog # 

On December 22 2011 16:05 Brutaxilos wrote:
eh im in a similar situation. my best friend (who was approaching becoming my girlfriend) and i got into an argument a few months back. we havent resolved it yet. even worse, it seems like all my other friends are either getting retarded or are so closed off with their other friends. lunchtime at school is so depressing now because i dont know where to sit. no matter where no body talks to me i dont even know what im doing wrong. if you wanna talk shoot me a PM. itl probably make me feel better as well.


PM sent my man!
You may say I'm a dreamer, but I am not the only one. - John Lennon
Old Post

 
 Whole   United States. December 22 2011 16:09. Posts 4946
Profile Blog # 
Well I wouldn't go as far as forsaking people and friendships...it is just that friendships are something that you need to put a lot of time and effort into to get a long lasting sanctification and to get loyalty.
Last edit: 2011-12-22 16:10:12
Manager of IdrA Fanclub and @GrackenNews (https://twitter.com/#!/GrackenNews)
Old Post

 
 LuckyFool   United States. December 22 2011 16:11. Posts 8288
Profile Blog # 
I'll be your friend imjorman!
@LuckyFool88
Old Post

 
 imjorman   United States. December 22 2011 16:14. Posts 580
Profile Blog # 

On December 22 2011 16:09 Whole wrote:
Well I wouldn't go as far as forsaking people and friendships...it is just that friendships are something that you need to put a lot of time and effort into to get a long lasting sanctification.


See that's just it though.

After graduating high school I was, by and large, prepared for not seeing my friends again. It just happens - people go separate ways at that stage in life. After three years of school, I have better friends than I did in those years of elementary school all the way through high school.

But these college friends, I'm kinda not sure how to handle. Most likely we'll be splitting ways in a year as we all have different plans for life. But like how am I supposed to invest in that if I have a YEAR to make friends that will go away.

The buddies I've been super close with during my university years are starting to act as if I'm some burden. I'm either always around or never around. And when I'm there I'm not wanted and when i'm not there they say that "I don't want to spend time with them."

I don't know.

I'm down for making new friends, I just don't know how. Maybe at this point in life I should take a break from friends?

It's just weird because I've never been someone that cared about the social aspect of life before it's just that now, as it's starting to go away that I realize that I enjoy.

idfk.
You may say I'm a dreamer, but I am not the only one. - John Lennon
Old Post

 
 Zorkmid   Canada. December 22 2011 16:19. Posts 3858
Profile Blog # 

I'm wildly successful by societies standards for being a 20 year old


Is this the kinda thing you say out in public? If so I might have a theory as to why you feel the way you do....
Old Post

 
 FinestHour   United States. December 22 2011 16:19. Posts 6702
Profile # 
Make sure to not take it out on her. Do not let your feelings influence the way you treat her. Just a tip
thug life.
Old Post

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