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| Newbistic China. April 01 2012 17:13. Posts 2911 | Profile Blog # |
The Ghetto Cook Episode XXV:
Cheesecake II
Cross posted from http://foodinmind.wordpress.com
Introduction
Hello gentle readers, it's been a while. This hiatus wasn't intentional. Blogs and dishes were planned... beautiful plans. But the stars of the universe fell out of alignment and re-arranged themselves into the "FUCK YOU" constellation. I got sick. I injured my wrists. Life sucked.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/B5WQH.jpg)
Twinkle, twinkle, little star.
The only hope laid in a single block of cream cheese left in the refrigerator. It was time for the return of the cheese cake. This time I know how to make it right. And as always, there is a twist to the theme: a fusion dessert between a cheese cake and an apple crisp. Cinnamon crust, creamy vanilla cheese cake filling, spiced apple topping. It's time to kick ass and chew bubble gum, and I'm health conscious so I chose to chew sugar-free Trident gum instead.
Ingredients
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/cv8PJ.jpg)
No spread this time, so you're just going to have to reverse engineer the ingredients from this photo instead. Good luck.
Total Time: 3-8 hours (depending on how you're counting)
Crust:
20 squares of graham crackers, crushed
6 tbsp rolled oats*
2 tbsp sugar
4 tbsp butter/margarine, melted
3/4 tsp salt
1 1/2 tbsp flour
1 tsp cinnamon
 o not used instant oats. Rolled oats may also be known as old-fashioned oats.
Filling:
One 8 oz block cream cheese, room temperature*
8 tbsp sour cream, room temperature
6 tbsp white granulated sugar
1/2 tsp salt
1 egg + 1 egg yolk, with yolks and whites separated, room temperature**
2 tbsp cream or half-and-half***
1 tsp vanilla extract
*Allow 3-4 hours at least to bring these ingredients to room temperature.
**This isn't essential, but I'm told by TL poster fire_brand that it results in a lighter filling.
***This also isn't essential, but makes beating eggs easier.
Topping:
2 medium crisp apples, such as Fuji or Granny Smith
Juice of 1/2 lemon or 1/2 orange
3 tbsp brown sugar*
1/2 tsp salt
1 1/4 tbsp flour
6 tbsp of water, as needed**
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp nutmeg
*This is for Fuji apples. You may need 4-5 tablespoons of sugar for a tart apple such as Granny Smith.
**More or less, depending on desired thickness of sauce.
You will also need: A (preferably two) muffin tin mold, at least two somewhat large bowls, a small pot, among other things.
Cooking
We begin with the filling. Take your pieces of graham crackers and stick them into a sturdy bag, such as that of the Zip-loc variety. Then either using your fingers or some other implement, crush the graham crackers into tiny bits. You can also beat them into submission with a rolling pin if you are feeling particularly violent.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/PZZSb.jpg)
If you have a bomb shelter, simply place the crackers in a small pile in the center of the bomb shelter, toss a grenade into the bomb shelter, and close the door. Let the grenade do the work.
In a separate container, melt the butter. You can do this in a microwave by microwaving at 5 second intervals and swishing the melted butter around until everything is melted. Add your tiny graham cracker bits and all the other ingredients.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/7eZhf.jpg)
This flour looks like cocaine cut with feta cheese. But it's flour. Really.
Mix thoroughly. Preheat your oven to 300F (150C). Butter your muffin tin and spoon about 3 tablespoons of this mixture into each mold. Using a spoon or a small butter bowl (what I used), press the mixture into a hollow bowl shape against the sides of the mold.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/aq3EH.jpg)
Possibly the most annoying step in making mini-cheesecakes. A lot less annoying with practice, but still annoying.
Bake these crusts by themselves for 7 minutes. Meanwhile, onto the filling! You can use a mixer or do the filling by hand. Making the filling by hand is obviously more difficult but not impossible, especially if the ingredients are softened at room temperature. Measure out 8 tablespoons or 1/2 cup of sour cream into a bowl. Mix this by itself for a bit so that you coat your bowl with sour cream, which will prevent cream cheese from sticking to the sides of your bowl. Dump your block of sour cream into the midst of sour cream, and mash everything together.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/o3cjD.jpg)
White-on-white dairy product action. What luck, to not be born lactose intolerant!
Somewhere along the line, when sour cream and cream cheese have intertwined themselves into a near congruous mass, add sugar. The sugar will lighten and somewhat fluff up this mixture. While you are doing the mixing, especially by hand, your blind-baked crusts may be ready. Remove them from the oven. If at this time your filling mixture is already done, do not pour it into the molds right away! Let the molds sit for at least 5 minutes to cool down, or it will instantly cook the part of the filling that touches it, and you will receive the game-over screen have a disaster-flavored cheese cake, which doesn't taste very good.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/J2NNQ.jpg)
I know I listed "cream" on the ingredient list, but your mother just happened by, and I noticed she was lactating... two for two, yeah?
Now prepare (or add to your cream cheese/sour cream mixture) your beaten, separated egg yolks and egg white. You can add a bit of half-and-half or cream to the egg parts at this time to make it easier to beat. Add the eggs, salt, and vanilla extract to your filling. Mix everything until smooth.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/aCwMx.jpg)
I was kidding about the above image caption. The flavor of this cheesecake would be totally ruined if I added sour milk. MUHAHAHA
While you are doing all this, you will want to reduce the oven temperature to 250F (120C) and prepare a pan filled partially with water as a water bath. Filling your muffin molds to the brim with cheese cake filling. Bake for about 25 minutes.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/lUnHC.jpg)
Okay, I was kidding about the above comment also. I'm sure your mother is a very nice woman. And if she smacked you while you were young, well, you deserved it.
After 25 minutes, check your cheese cake. It should still appear soft, but solid. At this time turn off your oven heat and leave the door open for about a minute. Then, close the door and leave the cheesecakes in the oven for another hour. This will let the cheesecakes finish cooking to perfection.
Meanwhile, you can start on your spiced apple topping! First juice your lemon/orange into a container. This is so you can dunk your apple pieces into the juice as soon as they are chopped to prevent oxidation (browning). Peel and core your apples.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/arZxc.jpg)
Have you seen how Sakai peels his apples on Iron Chef? He uses his chef knife, does it 3x faster than I do it with the small knife which is what most people use, it's fucking ridiculous.
Chop them into bite-sized pieces (preferably 1/2 inch, or even smaller than what I have chopped here). Dump them into the citrus juice and toss them around. Add all the spices, flour, salt, and sugar. Mix together. Chill for at least half an hour to marinate.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/CsmkV.jpg)
When people call other people the apple of their eye, I wonder if they think of all the terrible things we do to apples that involve sharp objects or intolerable heat levels.
Take your apples out of the refrigerator. Cook your apples over medium heat until the sauce starts to thicken, then add as much water as needed to thin out the sauce and partially cover most of the apple pieces. Once the liquid comes to a boil, bring the heat down to low. Put a lid over your apples and simmer them for 8 minutes or so. The steam will cook through your apples. Add water as necessary.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/ii4eU.jpg)
Let me just say here that apple sauce tastes like shit. Apples have nice texture as well as nice flavor. It's like bacon in that way. Would you puree bacon into bacon sauce? Of course not, you lose the crispy texture. Don't fucking puree your apples and make it into mush.
Once the apples are cooked to your desired texture remove them from the heat and set aside. At this point in time your cheesecakes may have finished cooking. Deposit them into the refrigerator to chill for at least an hour. If, like me, you have only a single muffin tin, you may move onto making your second batch of cheese cakes. Otherwise, top your chilled cheesecakes with your spice apples and enjoy.
The Result
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/pwPpG.jpg)
Cheese, or cake? Cheese, or cake? Millenia have men struggled to answer this question. But now, you can have both at the same time.
4.9 / 5 Cheesecakes are one of those things that take a long time to make, but the procedure is rather easy and fool-proof to producing a great tasting product. It is also flexible enough to allow for easy experimentation. In this case, apple crisp cheese cake. Apples are one of the cheapest fruits in the United States, next to bananas, navel oranges, and occasionally grapefruit. To work them into a cheesecake is a natural step in the logic of a budget cook. If you have most of these ingredients in your house, consider investing in a bit of cream cheese and sour cream to make this dessert. You won't regret it.
Conclusion
...Thus man and cake were united, first at the lips, then through the esophagus, and then into a bath of hydrochloric acid, then.... the tale doesn't end happily every after and becomes a bit disgusting. Well, at least the beginning of the tale is deliciously sweet. And what more can you ask for? We're born with taste buds on the tongue and not around the rectum for a reason. The end.
If you enjoy my series of blogs, or cooking in general, please consider browsing through the previous entries of my blog, all conveniently centralized at my main blog Food in Mind.
As always, questions and comments are welcome. Until next time, bon appetit, except if you are on a diet, in which case you probably wished your appetite wasn't as good!Last edit: 2012-04-01 17:44:53
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| willus Australia. April 01 2012 17:28. Posts 35 | Profile # |
| Making this tonight, looks really delicious! |
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| Azera Singapore. April 01 2012 17:29. Posts 3367 | Profile Blog # |
Holy shit looks amazing!
Cinnamon crust, creamy vanilla cheese cake filling, spiced apple topping.
Mouth started watering as soon as I read that.
Thanks for the sick recipe :DLast edit: 2012-04-01 17:30:13 |
| | Trudge comfortably | Check out some glorious music made by TLers - http://bit.ly/QXYhdb , by intrigue. http://bit.ly/RTjpOR , by ohsea.toc. | |
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| Disregard China. April 01 2012 17:37. Posts 8061 | Profile Blog # |
If I remember from watching Alton Brown shows 
Room temperature cream cheese will result in less lumps and excessive beating of the filling in your finished product. |
| | "Architects know nothing about everything" |
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| sharky246 April 01 2012 19:11. Posts 1010 | Profile Blog # |
| I missed those days when you used to show tasty food recipes with cheap ingredients, hence the name ghetto cook. Now they are just tasty, not cheap. |
| | On January 03 2011 13:14 IdrA wrote: being high on the ladder doesnt get you any closer to your goal. Avoiding practice to protect your rating is absurd. If you want to be good go play 40 games a day and stop thinking about becoming a pro. |
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| Newbistic China. April 01 2012 19:30. Posts 2911 | Profile Blog # |
On April 01 2012 19:11 sharky246 wrote:
I missed those days when you used to show tasty food recipes with cheap ingredients, hence the name ghetto cook. Now they are just tasty, not cheap.
Hey that hurts man.
But you're right. I've considered scrapping the "Ghetto Cook" moniker, but 1) I'm not quite ready to branch out into truly costly ingredients such as meat and fish and 2) I can't think of another catchy name for a middle-of-the-road budget food blog.
Most meals I cook for myself are extremely cheap, but not blog-worthy unfortunately. I distinctly remember eating instant noodle for dinner on the evening I made the previous cheesecake blog. Half a packet of ramen flavoring, 2 packs of ramen, frozen peas, an egg, sriracha sauce to round it out. Pretty simple and boring.
I'll take your words into considerations for future entries.
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| Type|NarutO Germany. April 01 2012 19:50. Posts 14937 | Profile Blog # |
You are not ghetto enough, you use a real knife.
![[image loading]](http://ak.buy.com/PI/0/500/205669795.jpg)
Go for it. Awesome recipe, I love cheesecake :-)! Thanks for the good read. 5/5 |
| | Polt | MMA | Jjakji | BoxeR | NaDa | MVP | MKP ... truly inspiring. |
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| EdSlyB Portugal. April 01 2012 20:18. Posts 1620 | Profile Blog # |
That seems rather delicious. But I'm not very good at desserts so it might take a while to experiment this.
Hmmm now that I think about it, I could turn this recipe into a full size cheesecake, right? Instead of making the all the little muffins. What do you think, MasterGhetto Chef? |
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| htn2481 Vietnam. April 01 2012 23:09. Posts 105 | Profile Blog # |
| I suggest that your XXX episode be dedicated to Vin Diesel. |
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| Dacendoran United States. April 02 2012 01:00. Posts 764 | Profile Blog # |
| I'm not a big fan of apples except fresh could you reccomend me a nice recipe for strawberry topping instead =3. |
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| htn2481 Vietnam. April 02 2012 01:03. Posts 105 | Profile Blog # |
On April 02 2012 01:00 Dacendoran wrote:
I'm not a big fan of apples except fresh could you reccomend me a nice recipe for strawberry topping instead =3.
You might want to look at his previous entry: cheesecake 1, entry xxiii
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| Angel_ United States. April 02 2012 02:49. Posts 1615 | Profile Blog # |
On April 01 2012 19:50 Type|NarutO wrote:You are not ghetto enough, you use a real knife. Go for it. Awesome recipe, I love cheesecake :-)! Thanks for the good read. 5/5
box cutter. =D |
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| Newbistic China. April 02 2012 04:51. Posts 2911 | Profile Blog # |
On April 01 2012 20:18 EdSlyB wrote:
That seems rather delicious. But I'm not very good at desserts so it might take a while to experiment this.
Hmmm now that I think about it, I could turn this recipe into a full size cheesecake, right? Instead of making the all the little muffins. What do you think, MasterGhetto Chef?
You can definitely make a full sized cheesecake. Here are the (approximate) changes you need to make if you use a cheesecake/springform pan:
1) double the portions for the filling (use 3 whole eggs)
2) increase crust portions by about 25%
3) blind bake crust for 10 minutes
4) bake the cheesecake for about 45 minutes to 1 hour (start checking at 45 minutes)
5) refrigerate for 4-5 hours before serving
6) If you are using a springform pan, you will want to cover the bottom with aluminum foil before submerging the pan into a water bath.
Most cheesecake recipes out there are for full-sized cheesecakes, so you can do recipe amount comparisons with those if you really wish to be precise.
Hope that helps.
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| MeShiet Canada. April 02 2012 08:36. Posts 254 | Profile # |
| These look absolutely amazing and as a fan of cheesecake, I will make it my duty to learn how to make them at least once in my life. However, is it possible to not use the rolled oats in the crust? I don't like the texture of oats or cereals of any sort to be honest. Thanks for sharing! |
| | If you die this way, you won't live to tell anyone how you died |
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| Newbistic China. April 02 2012 17:40. Posts 2911 | Profile Blog # |
On April 02 2012 08:36 MeShiet wrote:
These look absolutely amazing and as a fan of cheesecake, I will make it my duty to learn how to make them at least once in my life. However, is it possible to not use the rolled oats in the crust? I don't like the texture of oats or cereals of any sort to be honest. Thanks for sharing!
It's perfectly possible to omit the oats. Simply replace them with about 6-8 more graham cracker squares and omit the flour in the crust altogether.
The only real anchor in this recipe is the filling for the cheesecake (and even that can be changed if you know what you are doing). Everything else can be changed at will, including what you wish for the topping to be and how you want the crust to taste like (for example, a chocolate or caramel topping instead of spiced apples and removing the cinnamon from the crust, among other things). |
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