G-1 Champions League LAN F…
Bruno Community Q&A
Beyond the Summit and TL S…
AMD Premier League S1 Gran…
TI3 East Qualifier Preview
TL Site Changes
Pizza: All Tiers Reached
Vici and RisingStars Advan…
LGD.cn and RaTtLeSnAkE Adv…
DES Sonic Interview 5/18/2…
Papa John's explores EG, L…
Liquid wins the Curse Invi…
Get 50% off Papa John's pi…
TL Advertising Features
McDonald's 'supporting' …
Dating, how's your luck?
UK Soldier beheaded in L…
Ice Fingers while gaming
The XBox One
TL Site Changes
The Automated Ban List
Seoul LoL allstars Meetup …
Presenting Store 2.0
BarCraft #8 in Tokyo Japan!!
IMMvp Fan Club
The Liquid`TLO Fanclub
stream of Flixse
[Stream] Saiton
Building a midrange gaming…
Simple Questions Simple An…
What mouse/pad does your f…
Any fix for Twitch tv lag?
Computer Build Resource Th…
General Discussion
Dota 2 QQ thread
Beyond the Summit and TL…
Invites and Qualifiers f…
Bruno Community Q&A
All Pick - Wong Hock Chuan
[G-1] LAN Finals
Merita $250+ Australian Do…
Starladder Season 6
Liquid Pasture Community L…
[The International] Easter…
Simple Questions, Simple A…
Question: Luna Item Build
[G]uide to Lifestealer
Newly ported Hero discussi…
[G] In-Game Dota Guide for…
[Update] itemBay SSL Gra…
TeamLiquid Legacy Starle…
Terror[fou] stream on tw…
[D] New BW Server
My Review of the Starcra…
DES Sonic Interview 5/18…
[GC S3] Gambit's Cup Semif…
Gambit's Cup Season 3 Roun…
D Ranks Teamleague Season 4
C Ranks Teamleague Season 1
Gem League II
Simple Questions, Simple A…
Increasing APM/EAPM
Practice Partner Thread
Challenger map on Starcraf…
2012 - 2013 Football Thr…
World of Tanks
Steam Trading Cards
Formula 1 - 2013
Champions League/Europa …
[T] Bastard "Mini" Mafia!
Doctor Who Mafia
Bastard "Mini" Mafia Vote …
General nutrition recommen…
Running Thread
The Injuries Thread
Leta - Movie
Michael - skyline
Anytime - Beast
By.Hero - Shuttle
Anytime - Pusan
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads


IRC Web Chat

TeamSpeak 3 (63 users)


Active: 8845 users

Human contender in mortal-kombat-like tournament

Forum Index > Blogs 1 2 3 All
 
 reapsen   Germany. April 30 2012 21:30. Posts 421
Profile Blog # 
Hi TL,

i just saw this movie review and it got me thinking.

Who would earth send to a interplanetary fighting tournament right now?

To clarify this, let me lay down the rules:

- The tournament happens in 6 month from this day. That would be the time the fighter has to prepare.

- The tournament is weapon-free body combat. It is fought with minimal to no protection. Small fingerless fighting-gloves or feet protectors are allowed though, if the fighter wants to wear them.

- The aliens that will fight in the tournament can be assumed to be in a basic human-shaped form, i.e. have a torso, a head and 4 limbs. Proportions of these may vary though.

- The maximum weight of a fighter must not exceed 200 kg / 441 lbs. Below that no weight classes exist.

- Fights happens in boxing-ring type of arena. In rounds of 5minutes with a 1minute break in between. They can end in surrender (tapping out), knockout or even death. No point-system bullshit.

- "Dirty fighting" is allowed. As it is unkown where the weakspots of each alien race are, there are no forbidden hitzones. Whatever you think are weakspots (eyes, crotch, small limbs, etc.) you are good to go for these. The only thing the referee looks for is one of the losing conditions mentioned above.

- At stake is humanities freedom. All losing species must serve the winner as slaves for a decade until the next tournament.


So now the main question: WHO WOULD WE SEND?
You may name one fighter and one stand-in, if one gets injured during training or so...

Okay, to make it more fun, you can name two pairs of fighters:

Pair 1: Must be alive and non-fictional, i.e. actual real fighters of now. One Fighter, one Stand-in.
Pair 2: Must only be non-ficitional. No "Son-Goku" or "Dr.Manhattan" bs please
Last edit: 2012-04-30 21:41:10


**
Old Post

 
 Grovbolle   Denmark. April 30 2012 21:38. Posts 2607
Profile Blog # 
Can we only consider people who are alive?
GIVE ME COMMAND - Lies, damned lies and statistics: http://aligulac.com - @Sc2Aligulac - "I don't want Losira to go through because he is Zerg, but because he is Losira, he transcends all race" - TheBB
Old Post

 
 reapsen   Germany. April 30 2012 21:41. Posts 421
Profile Blog # 
Look at my edit @Grovbolle
Old Post

  dragonsuper   Liechtenstein. April 30 2012 21:41. Posts 222Profile # 
Jean Claude Van Damme
lol
Old Post

 
 HwangjaeTerran   Finland. April 30 2012 21:44. Posts 4968
Profile Blog # 
Would something change if we lost?

I'd send some psycho killer. OD him with all the drugs before the match.
Last edit: 2012-04-30 21:44:46
“Work is against human nature. The proof is that it makes us tired.” Michel Tournier
Old Post

 
 Grovbolle   Denmark. April 30 2012 21:46. Posts 2607
Profile Blog # 
Does it have to be in their current form?
I mean Chuck Norris was pretty badass back in the days.
GIVE ME COMMAND - Lies, damned lies and statistics: http://aligulac.com - @Sc2Aligulac - "I don't want Losira to go through because he is Zerg, but because he is Losira, he transcends all race" - TheBB
Old Post

 
 Spicy_Curry   United States. April 30 2012 21:46. Posts 2340
Profile Blog # 
obligatory chuck norris
jean claude van damme as stand in
High risk no reward - #RoadToTI3
Old Post

 
 Reuental   United States. April 30 2012 22:03. Posts 367
Profile # 
Bruce Lee, only viable choice.
I'm a Crab made of men.
Old Post

  GTR   April 30 2012 22:17. Posts 39111Profile Blog # 
GSP.
Twitter: @TL_GTR | Stream: http://www.twitch.tv/notyuna
Old Post

 
 sc4k   United Kingdom. April 30 2012 22:19. Posts 4417
Profile Blog # 
It's tough. What you would want to do is take a bunch of top athletes including the UFC heavyweights and give them the best performance enhancing drugs combination known to man. It would probably end up being Alistair Overeem who would have the best chance of winning but then again, if someone like Lebron James has any natural fighting skills, he has the athletic qualities necessary, he could get to about 260-70 of lean muscle, and hurt some aliens.

Basically no UFC fighters or boxers under heavyweight would be able to cut it, they would be destroyed by a 300lb+ alien like Goro. Although I do think a fighter like anderson silva or floyd mayweather might be good enough and accurate enough to strike any weakpoints and fast enough to escape.

But to be honest, to design a fighting creature, humans are in the bottom 1 percentile for earth. An angry 140 lb chimp could destroy any human on the planet and rip them limb from limb.
Last edit: 2012-04-30 22:21:51
Old Post

 
 Artifice   United States. April 30 2012 22:19. Posts 512
Profile # 
I'd send myself and just bank on the fact that all aliens will melt when I pee on them. A stand in wouldn't be necessary because pee training isn't very dangerous.
Old Post

 
 Mr. Wiggles   Canada. April 30 2012 22:29. Posts 4685
Profile Blog # 

On April 30 2012 22:19 sc4k wrote:
It's tough. What you would want to do is take a bunch of top athletes including the UFC heavyweights and give them the best performance enhancing drugs combination known to man. It would probably end up being Alistair Overeem who would have the best chance of winning but then again, if someone like Lebron James has any natural fighting skills, he has the athletic qualities necessary, he could get to about 260-70 of lean muscle, and hurt some aliens.

Basically no UFC fighters or boxers under heavyweight would be able to cut it, they would be destroyed by a 300lb+ alien like Goro. Although I do think a fighter like anderson silva or floyd mayweather might be good enough and accurate enough to strike any weakpoints and fast enough to escape.

But to be honest, to design a fighting creature, humans are in the bottom 1 percentile for earth. An angry 140 lb chimp could destroy any human on the planet and rip them limb from limb.

Hey, that's actually a good idea, let's just send in a Gorilla or Orangutan and claim it's a person. The aliens will never know the difference.

Also, how would we train these people? This is a deathmatch, right? So that implies that fighting styles would have to be adapted to be able to make best use of there actually being no rules. I don't know much about fighting styles though, so maybe someone else should make suggestions.
"Dulce et decorum est pro Aiur mori" -Zealot | TL Mafia is the best sub-forum around, no lie!
Old Post

 
 VirgilSC2   United States. April 30 2012 22:45. Posts 5743
Profile Blog # 
[image loading]

Seriously, how can you NOT send Tom Cruise?

It's a win-win situation really, plus I'm sure he knows more about the aliens than anyone else.

You can send this guy as his stand-in.
[image loading]
Clarity Gaming General Manager | ClarityGaming.com | @VirgilSC2
Old Post

 
 Slayer91   Ireland. April 30 2012 22:56. Posts 8841
Profile # 

On April 30 2012 22:19 sc4k wrote:

But to be honest, to design a fighting creature, humans are in the bottom 1 percentile for earth. An angry 140 lb chimp could destroy any human on the planet and rip them limb from limb.


You sure about this? I mean, your average office worker who does no exercise sure, but any trained extremely strong anf fit human? More intelligent and more experienced and trained in fighting I can't see why the chimp would be stronger, or at least strong enough to beat a trained fighter in combat.
Last edit: 2012-04-30 23:00:20
Cognito ergo diablo.
Old Post

 
 Grovbolle   Denmark. April 30 2012 23:41. Posts 2607
Profile Blog # 

On April 30 2012 22:56 Slayer91 wrote:

Show nested quote +



You sure about this? I mean, your average office worker who does no exercise sure, but any trained extremely strong anf fit human? More intelligent and more experienced and trained in fighting I can't see why the chimp would be stronger, or at least strong enough to beat a trained fighter in combat.


I think he is talking muscle capacity and fighting skills assuming that the chimp is of equal intelligence.

GIVE ME COMMAND - Lies, damned lies and statistics: http://aligulac.com - @Sc2Aligulac - "I don't want Losira to go through because he is Zerg, but because he is Losira, he transcends all race" - TheBB
Old Post

 
 Najda   United States. April 30 2012 23:44. Posts 1772
Profile Blog # 

On April 30 2012 22:56 Slayer91 wrote:

Show nested quote +



You sure about this? I mean, your average office worker who does no exercise sure, but any trained extremely strong anf fit human? More intelligent and more experienced and trained in fighting I can't see why the chimp would be stronger, or at least strong enough to beat a trained fighter in combat.


We aren't a natural built predator. We have to use tools to hunt, unlike animals such as a lion. We didn't evolve to be the fastest and strongest animals alive, we evolved to be the most adaptable. I'd send a gorilla to go fight, the average gorilla has 6-10 times more upper body strength than a human and I'd imagine is much more resilient as well.
"Admit your flaws, admire your weakness, hone your imperfections – then may you address your desires." — Paul Crik
Old Post

 
 Lyter   United Kingdom. April 30 2012 23:48. Posts 1930
Profile Blog # 
I'd send jaedong to stare some fuckers down
Old Post

 
 Moliere   April 30 2012 23:53. Posts 51
Profile # 
An intergalactic fight for the future of humanity? Oh, wait... humans potentially can't cut it?

Send the gorillas.

Rise of the Planet of the Apes II.
Old Post

 
 Shock710   Australia. April 30 2012 23:58. Posts 2930
Profile Blog # 
is it fair that its un-armred combat i mean humans main weapon are tools like making stuff, imagine a lion-alien in a gun fight 0_o damn that would be awesome, but yeah probaby bruce lee if it was alive the man practically does nothing but train (well obvsiouly not anymore) this reminds me of AvP where we basically suck....
The day before christmas my true love gave to me: Teamliquid | [23:55] <Shock710> that was out of context -_-
Old Post

 
 AKomrade   United States. May 01 2012 00:07. Posts 558
Profile Blog # 
All I see is another reason to learn necromancy to revive Bruce Lee.
ALL HAIL THE KING IN THE NORTH! HAIL! HAIL!
Old Post

1 2 3 All
Please log in or register to reply.
 
Refresh
StarCraft: Brood War
StarCraft 2
Dota 2
Other Notable Streams
[ Show 54 non-featured ]

» Recent SC2 Results
» Premier SC2 Tournaments

The Little App Factory