On July 08 2012 16:58 FabledIntegral wrote: I should have peer pressured you to drink when we were in vegas.
...
Maybe you need a make-over or to work out? It's not all about what's inside, despite how certain males think when it comes to girls being interested in guys?
Dont look at the finger or you will miss all that heavenly glory.
bloopie United States. July 08 2012 19:43. Posts 119
You need both inner and outer game. outer game is relatively easily solved - workout, get bigger/toned, dress nicely + shoes, do your hair properly, drop your glasses if possible (I know, cuz i was a nerdy asian kid with glasses)
inner game means confidence, voice control, being a good conversationalist, knowing how to match the girl's energy. To get a girlfriend, you need a girl. (duh). Therefore, you need to be in places with girls. (duh). if you are at home all the time, there is no girl, therefore you have no girlfriend.
Places with girls: Nightlife. (the best person to go with is a wing woman, but since that looks like an unlikely option, go with a dude or 2. make sure they know what they are doing, and are at least comfortable around with women.) Go to house parties. Know people who know people. Next: social clubs. Greek life, if not social organizations. Go to language/acting/music/psych classes, events (I am not a fan of meeting girls in classes because its such a bad frame to start from! you are simply another dude who is doing homework with her) Last way, social circles. Know people who know girls, hang out with them, and slowly work your way.
metbull United States. July 08 2012 22:28. Posts 404
I personally know so many attractive girls that swoon over unattractive male med school students.
Don't worry, finish med school then start random relationships (Fx buddy) with the nurses you work with. That's what the unmarried doctors my wife works with do.
Polar_Nada United States. July 09 2012 14:14. Posts 1545
You need both inner and outer game. outer game is relatively easily solved - workout, get bigger/toned, dress nicely + shoes, do your hair properly, drop your glasses if possible (I know, cuz i was a nerdy asian kid with glasses)
inner game means confidence, voice control, being a good conversationalist, knowing how to match the girl's energy. To get a girlfriend, you need a girl. (duh). Therefore, you need to be in places with girls. (duh). if you are at home all the time, there is no girl, therefore you have no girlfriend.
Places with girls: Nightlife. (the best person to go with is a wing woman, but since that looks like an unlikely option, go with a dude or 2. make sure they know what they are doing, and are at least comfortable around with women.) Go to house parties. Know people who know people. Next: social clubs. Greek life, if not social organizations. Go to language/acting/music/psych classes, events (I am not a fan of meeting girls in classes because its such a bad frame to start from! you are simply another dude who is doing homework with her) Last way, social circles. Know people who know girls, hang out with them, and slowly work your way.
Yes. Thank you for this. My goodness I don't know how on earth I am going to do all of this. Everything you have mentioned is way out of my comfort zone. But I will try my best, hopefully starting with building up myself first.
[ReD]NaDa and fnaticMSI.SEn fighting~! ::POlar @ UC Irvine::
eSgTheBear United States. July 09 2012 23:48. Posts 47
I think saying that a girl will get in the way of school is just another excuse out of the many you have for why you've never had a girlfriend. Do you really believe there is no girl out there that will understand your situation? You are not doing much to make yourself noticeable for girls either. Try figuring out why girls don't find you attractive and fix that. Compensate for your bad attributes by enhancing others. Goodluck have fun.
Poopendale
Facultyadjutant Sweden. July 10 2012 05:55. Posts 1173
On July 05 2012 08:31 blabber wrote: so do you want a girlfriend or do you not
i dont know! I have mixed feelings, so im asking for advice here. lollollololol
I can see you are terrible at this by the lollollololol... *shivers*
I have very socially inept friends who lean on these things: ''internet sayings'', memes and other internet quirky culture. They don´t use it to create original thoughts, but just as exclamations to fill the void when you have nothing and is expected to say something. Edit: Don´t get me wrong, I have nothing against them, they are actually my friends, and I like them. But they can only really hang with established peers, they are very incapable of getting into new groups.
Look over what you say to your friends and see after if you found yourself relying on these crutches.
If so: Stop doing them, and feel relaxation in silence.
Unable to handle silence is most awkward people´s problem, because the reaction to silence is the easiest way to see if someone is insecure or not.
Last edit: 2012-07-10 07:51:50
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Cheshyr United States. July 10 2012 06:01. Posts 75
I think the best thing you can do is start being more social. It will be uncomfortable at first, but that's normal for everyone. It is much harder to find a social life after you finish school, so start now. Consider it practice... you're just learning how to have comversations and feel comfortable in social settings. It will be very very weird at first. You'll make mistakes. Just keep going out. Parties, school events, join a club or two... something to get you around people. You don't need to go crazy, but you need to go out, even when you don't feel like it. It'll become easy soon enough.
Polar_Nada United States. July 11 2012 13:05. Posts 1545
man. this week there were so many girls that were like sitting alone, but i had NO CONFIDENCE at all to talk to them. I have no idea how to open!!!
For example, today there was this hot ass asian girl in the bus, and there were very few people also in the bus. She was even wearing a see-through shirt (kinda) so i saw her underwear. I got an instant boner and it was awkward as fuck. ~_~
[ReD]NaDa and fnaticMSI.SEn fighting~! ::POlar @ UC Irvine::
Whether or not you want a girlfriend, you should be seeking every opportunity possible to engage in polite/well-intentioned conversation with as many girls as possible. I believe you have issues with confidence, but you have to understand when you're talking to girls that they're more concerned with how THEY sound/look than they are with how YOU sound/look. Don't ever be afraid to talk to a girl about damn near anything, and if you're having trouble taking that first step, plan a story or a conversation topic that you know a lot about before you confront her. You'd be shocked how many wonderful conversations I've started with "Hey, I'm Tim (Extend hand and shake gently). How are you today?"
When in doubt, stay POSITIVE, be FRIENDLY, and SMILE. Even if a girl isn't interested in dating you, and you become disinterested in dating her, it doesn't mean you can't like each other and enjoy the conversation. You need to approach talking to a girl not as "trying to hook up" but as "trying to meet a new friend and learn as much as you can about them."
Coaching TangStarcraft.com | Team All-Inspiration.com | Stream Twitch.TV/TangSC
bloopie United States. July 13 2012 12:22. Posts 119
since you are starting out, don't think of getting a gf. Truthfully, since u are new to all this, chances are you are gonna mess up the first one. just talk and meet girls, leave the hook up chat to better areas like parties.
In fact, imho the best option for you right now is to find epic dudes who can pull girls, so you know what to do. Know that when you are beside them, girls would not see you as you pale so much in comparison. But learn all their tricks, what they do, and what makes them tick. bide your time, and continue your self improvement. I would advise reading all the PUA stuff, notwithstanding the ethical issues, but because they provide some concrete steps that would be useful to a totally new dude.
i should know all this, because I used to be in your exact shoes. Now, after much hard work, I know what to do, and how to pull relatively consistently. Girls call me from Beijing, New York, and different countries lol.
NoctemSC United States. July 13 2012 14:18. Posts 757
So I have a small problem I have with obtaining a girlfriend. I have never had a girlfriend, and I don't know how much I want to keep it that way anymore. I was always a very quiet guy, so I have very few girls that are friends.
In college, there are so many girls that I find very attractive, but the main problem is getting to even just talk to one. Also, I keep giving myself so many excuses. I feel like getting a girlfriend will hinder many many things. I will become distracted from starcraft 2, and my school work. Also, I am applying for med school this year, so if I were to acquire a relationship, it wont last that long.
But, I am also scared for marriage in the future when i still have so much difficulty with girls??
Pardon the terrible writing...
The part I put in bold text is true, having a Girlfriend WILL hinder your schoolwork and sc2 time. Frankly put, relationships require you to invest a copious amount of time to make them work. If you plan on having a Girlfriend then you need to plan on sacrificing some of your time, you're trading one thing for another. Honestly though, it sounds like you don't know what you want, friend. Perhaps you just need to get laid and not worry about a relationship until you're a bit more stable.
On July 13 2012 12:22 bloopie wrote:
i should know all this, because I used to be in your exact shoes. Now, after much hard work, I know what to do, and how to pull relatively consistently. Girls call me from Beijing, New York, and different countries lol.
Girls from different countries talk to you? That's called chatting, pal. It doesn't matter if you have a shit ton of girls talking to you if you're not actually going to meet them. Also, way to shamelessly talk up yourself in an advice blog.
Last edit: 2012-07-13 14:20:48
http://www.twitch.tv/noctemsc <--Most epic fun times
bloopie United States. July 13 2012 17:32. Posts 119
So I have a small problem I have with obtaining a girlfriend. I have never had a girlfriend, and I don't know how much I want to keep it that way anymore. I was always a very quiet guy, so I have very few girls that are friends.
In college, there are so many girls that I find very attractive, but the main problem is getting to even just talk to one. Also, I keep giving myself so many excuses. I feel like getting a girlfriend will hinder many many things. I will become distracted from starcraft 2, and my school work. Also, I am applying for med school this year, so if I were to acquire a relationship, it wont last that long.
But, I am also scared for marriage in the future when i still have so much difficulty with girls??
Pardon the terrible writing...
The part I put in bold text is true, having a Girlfriend WILL hinder your schoolwork and sc2 time. Frankly put, relationships require you to invest a copious amount of time to make them work. If you plan on having a Girlfriend then you need to plan on sacrificing some of your time, you're trading one thing for another. Honestly though, it sounds like you don't know what you want, friend. Perhaps you just need to get laid and not worry about a relationship until you're a bit more stable.
i should know all this, because I used to be in your exact shoes. Now, after much hard work, I know what to do, and how to pull relatively consistently. Girls call me from Beijing, New York, and different countries lol.
Girls from different countries talk to you? That's called chatting, pal. It doesn't matter if you have a shit ton of girls talking to you if you're not actually going to meet them. Also, way to shamelessly talk up yourself in an advice blog.
Oh sorry, forgot to mention that I have banged them all before. But you are right, i should stop derailing, just wanted to show a positive example to OP. Just PM me if anything.
Recognizable Netherlands. July 13 2012 19:07. Posts 1359
On July 11 2012 13:05 Polar_Nada wrote: man. this week there were so many girls that were like sitting alone, but i had NO CONFIDENCE at all to talk to them. I have no idea how to open!!!
For example, today there was this hot ass asian girl in the bus, and there were very few people also in the bus. She was even wearing a see-through shirt (kinda) so i saw her underwear. I got an instant boner and it was awkward as fuck. ~_~
It's not awkward unless she knows you have a boner.
And I don't think randomly going up and talking to girls that you have no idea who they are is the best way to meet girls anyways.
P.S. Don't go for girls out of your league anyways. Assuming this hot ass Asian girl is. Those aren't the best ones to go after if you don't have much experience ... save them for later. Many girls like confident/cocky douchebags too, so dont' show that you're nervous. Putting on a fake can help sometimes if you're nervous, just don't overdo it.
Last edit: 2012-07-15 18:12:40
Liquid`Jinro Sweden. July 15 2012 19:26. Posts 32587
I would argue that unless you are a professional SC2 player, this is a positive thing.
tell the guy that interplanatar interaction is pivotal to terrans variety of optionitudals in the pre-midgame preperatories as well as the protosstinal deterriggation of elite zergling strikes - Stimey n Formerly FrozenArbiter
