Beijing Blues, Part 5

Beijing in the summer is hot, muggy, and generally disgusting. I once made the mistake of riding the un-air-conditioned No.1 line from the office on Financial Street to Tiananmen West to visit a music conservatory/theater for a semi-professional production of Le Figaro. I showed up soaked with sweat, and had to run into the public bath across the street and pay forty RMB for a quick shower... which was all for naught because Sylvia came from Wudaokou, even further out, and the first thing she did was run up and hug me, smearing accumulated makeup and perspiration all over my chest.

Later that evening, I took her back to her house in Muxidi, where Sylvia's mom showed me photos from their family album, including a picture, prominently framed and blown up to the size of an entire page, of Sylvia's dad shaking hands with Gordon Brown as two sets of awkward-looking wives and children looked on from the sidelines.

The next photo was of Sylvia being hung in front of The Old Lady of Threadneedle Street. Below it, Sylvia's dad was holding her up high, so that it almost looked like her toddler's legs were dangling from the building itself.

Her mom spoke up. "We wanted her to go back to England for school, but..."

Sylvia answered forcefully from the other side of the house. "Mom! Why are you bringing that stuff up again?!" I noted that teenage girl angrish sounds the same, no matter what language it comes in.

Sylvia's parents desperately wanted her to become a banker. Apparently they had her whole life mapped out: she would go to a British boarding school, then get an Ivy League education, and grow up to be a banker-bureaucrat. Fate, it seemed, had cruelly decided to endow her with talents that would make her an excellent writer or literary critic rather than banker, a fact which caused no end of friction with her parents as they watched her miss academic cutoffs and flounder through quantitative classes.

Oh, and she was supposed to be a son. Apparently Sylvia's love of makeup and dressing up was borne out of being dressed in boy's clothes for the first eight years of her life.

I was woken up at 4AM the next day. It was Helen. Helen was drunk. The conversation went like this:

"I'm on the balcony."

"What?"

"Cooome overr...."

"Why?"

"I need someone to move my boss out of my apartment...."

"No."

"I'm on the balcony... the reception is so good here.... If he doesn't leave my apartment, I'm going to jump."

"Why me?"

"Because you're the only guy who I know will care... and who I can also tell about this...."

And that's how I ended up at her place at 5:30 in the morning. After moving him onto a taxi, I tried to head back up to her apartment. She didn't let me through the front door. I called her. No answer.

I felt like an idiot. She didn't show up at the English lessons that Sunday either. I asked Lee if he'd seen her. He shrugged, said no.

I got a text message from her the Tuesday after. "My 30th birthday is coming up. You're cordially invited." I wanted to tell her to go fuck herself, but I just told her that I was busy, and that was that.

I hoped.

Coming soon, Part 6: Never Wait Until the Airport to Say Goodbye

Check out my buddy's startup: http://techcrunch.com/2013/02/13/strikingly/

BLinD-RawR India. September 23 2012 12:59. Posts 24597

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Finally, what took you so long!

Ultimate KT Rolster Fanboy!| Afrotoss Fan #3|Neo.G_Soulkey – I was a better child than ZerO| Woo Jung Ho, never forget.| I want to make a game that will surpass Brood War!!! That is my dream.

ShadeR Australia. September 23 2012 13:13. Posts 6603

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brb while i read parts 1 thru 4.

Thaniri Canada. September 23 2012 14:14. Posts 557

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This is incredibly fluidly written, I read all 5 blogs in about 10 minutes. The story is very engaging, and because of the slick writing style the words flowed through my brain very easily.

Thaniri.336 NA, Thaniri.207 TW, SteamID boblepoh.

Aerisky United States. September 23 2012 14:44. Posts 9176

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Hm...uh oh, now shit hits the fan I suppose

sigh

Shady Sands United States. September 23 2012 15:00. Posts 3559

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@ Blind-rawr

Was offline a lot recently. Busy with work, also didn't know a good idea for the 2k post

@ Shader + Thaniri

Thanks for the kind words. Since these are mostly just recollections, it's easy to write it in a fluid manner

@ Aerisky

lol yep. Next part will be the finale, probably. Expect it to be long =)

Check out my buddy's startup: http://techcrunch.com/2013/02/13/strikingly/

Aerisky United States. September 23 2012 15:07. Posts 9176

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Ah, didn't realize this was your 2000th! Congratulations and here's to many more years and posts on TL

And cool, cool :D finale here we come~

Last edit: 2012-09-23 15:07:34

sigh

EtherealDeath United States. September 23 2012 15:45. Posts 8152

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She makes no sense. o.O

SC2: Kasu.767 ////////// Dota 2: 1a2a3a

kollin United Kingdom. September 23 2012 16:16. Posts 4125

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God this story is so good :D

@kollinsc2

BigFan September 23 2012 17:06. Posts 2336

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Amazing story, let's hope the finale comes sooner because I'm dying to know what happens! :D

#1 Innovation Fan! :D

B.I.G. September 23 2012 19:38. Posts 2042

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I wonder if mr sands is going to be stupid and cheat on his gf

docvoc United States. September 24 2012 03:14. Posts 3456

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Silly Shady, always tell them to jump

. Very seriously though that was a great thing to do.

User was warned for too many mimes.

digmouse China. September 24 2012 14:48. Posts 1186

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I read through 1 to 5, and OMG this is funny!
For me it's really really interesting (yet hilarious?) to see a foreigner living out of this so different culture and society, from a native Chinese perspective.

lilsusie September 24 2012 15:59. Posts 3715

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MOAR! This is awesome, keep writing!

"Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius - It's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring."

ArhK France. September 24 2012 22:19. Posts 276

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I want part 6 now !

Keep writing, it is very engaging :-).

Liquid`Jinro Sweden. October 17 2012 15:59. Posts 32587

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PART 6.
GIVE ME

tell the guy that interplanatar interaction is pivotal to terrans variety of optionitudals in the pre-midgame preperatories as well as the protosstinal deterriggation of elite zergling strikes - Stimey n Formerly FrozenArbiter

EtherealDeath United States. October 17 2012 16:00. Posts 8152

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On October 17 2012 15:59 Liquid`Jinro wrote:
PART 6.
GIVE ME

I DEMAND AS WELL.

SC2: Kasu.767 ////////// Dota 2: 1a2a3a

IndyO Australia. October 17 2012 18:29. Posts 222

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On October 17 2012 16:00 EtherealDeath wrote:

Show nested quote +

I DEMAND AS WELL.

I FURTHER THIS NOTION

I've been checking everyday the blogs page waiting for part 6 T.T

FractalsOnFire Australia. October 17 2012 20:26. Posts 1294