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 SweeTLemonS[TPR] United States. April 13 2009 14:14. Posts 9037 | Profile Blog |
Okay, so I was just talking to my friend about this, and I think it's really interesting, maybe no one else will. Should I ask my ex-gf if she cheated on me? As of now, there is little reason to ask her. She broke up with me a few days after Valentine's day (after dating for seven months, or so), and I think this weekend I'm going to get my stuff back from her (fucking finally).
It was a semi-long distance relationship (40 miles, approx). And she had a lot of male friends. Now, if there's something I know about men, it's that we hang out with women to have sex, not because they're fun to be with (because they generally aren't, imo). And there was some other things I found suspicious a few times. I mean, she claimed she loved me, etc, etc (why'd she break up with me then, right?)
Whatever. Long story short, I think I'm getting my shit back next weekend, and I'm considering asking her if she ever cheated on me (because I had a slight suspicion that she did). I really want to know, just for the sake of the knowledge, but--and this is why I'm asking here, because this is what makes this interesting to me--she's never said no in my head. I've played out the scenario, and asked in about a hundred different ways, and she always says no, and gets kind of mad at me for even suggesting it. BUT, what if she said yes? Would that knowledge be worth the potential pain it would cause (i.e. the relationship never meant anything to her, and I really wasted my time)? Would it hurt at all to know this?
Maybe this is a lame blog, but if you could answer the poll, and if anyone has experience with this, chime in, that'd be fantastic.
![[image loading]](/userpoll/draw.php?poll_id=5489)
Poll: Should I ask her?
(Vote): Yes
(Vote): No
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| | In the end what separates a man from a slave? Money? Power? No, a man chooses, and a slave obeys! |
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 yubee United States. April 13 2009 14:17. Posts 3761 | Profile Blog | |
| | i hit my face on the wall, and since then, everything has been very strange |
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 TommyG United States. April 13 2009 14:18. Posts 102 | Profile Blog |
On April 13 2009 14:14 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote:
Now, if there's something I know about men, it's that we hang out with women to have sex, not because they're fun to be with (because they generally aren't, imo).
hahaha love it. qft
i would say ignorance is bliss for this situation. unless you think you can handle the possibility of her saying yesLast edit: 2009-04-13 14:18:19 |
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| SweeTLemonS[TPR] United States. April 13 2009 14:19. Posts 9037 | Profile Blog |
On April 13 2009 14:18 TommyG wrote:
Show nested quote +On April 13 2009 14:14 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote:
Now, if there's something I know about men, it's that we hang out with women to have sex, not because they're fun to be with (because they generally aren't, imo).
hahaha love it. qft i would say ignorance is bliss for this situation. unless you think you can handle the possibility of her saying yes
I think I can. But even if I can't. I'm really interested in what knowing that way after the relationship has ended might do to the psychology of a person. Idk if this has been studied already or not, but I'm really just interested in this in a somewhat scientific way. |
| | In the end what separates a man from a slave? Money? Power? No, a man chooses, and a slave obeys! |
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 IntoTheWow Argentina. April 13 2009 14:22. Posts 25193 | Profile Blog |
| If you want to forget her and move on, asking her this is a step in the wrong direction. By the looks of it, it would only make you angry. |
| | TeamLiquid CJ Entusman #1 (PM to become an Entusman) • Newest member: asl-ninja |
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 fight_or_flight United States. April 13 2009 14:22. Posts 3534 | Profile Blog |
On April 13 2009 14:19 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote:
Show nested quote +On April 13 2009 14:18 TommyG wrote:
On April 13 2009 14:14 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote:
Now, if there's something I know about men, it's that we hang out with women to have sex, not because they're fun to be with (because they generally aren't, imo).
hahaha love it. qft i would say ignorance is bliss for this situation. unless you think you can handle the possibility of her saying yes
I think I can. But even if I can't. I'm really interested in what knowing that way after the relationship has ended might do to the psychology of a person. Idk if this has been studied already or not, but I'm really just interested in this in a somewhat scientific way.
I wouldn't try to stay objective or pretend to be objective. |
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| SweeTLemonS[TPR] United States. April 13 2009 14:24. Posts 9037 | Profile Blog |
On April 13 2009 14:22 fight_or_flight wrote:
Show nested quote +On April 13 2009 14:19 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote:
On April 13 2009 14:18 TommyG wrote:
On April 13 2009 14:14 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote:
Now, if there's something I know about men, it's that we hang out with women to have sex, not because they're fun to be with (because they generally aren't, imo).
hahaha love it. qft i would say ignorance is bliss for this situation. unless you think you can handle the possibility of her saying yes
I think I can. But even if I can't. I'm really interested in what knowing that way after the relationship has ended might do to the psychology of a person. Idk if this has been studied already or not, but I'm really just interested in this in a somewhat scientific way.
I wouldn't try to stay objective or pretend to be objective.
Look, honestly, I'm really just interested in getting my book/clothes back at this point.
Idk, from the looks of it, it was stupid to consider this at all, but I never even considered that she may say yes before my friend brought that possibility up. |
| | In the end what separates a man from a slave? Money? Power? No, a man chooses, and a slave obeys! |
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| TommyG United States. April 13 2009 14:25. Posts 102 | Profile Blog |
| well just make sure you have your stuff in your possession before you ask her anything |
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| KOFgokuon United States. April 13 2009 14:29. Posts 8011 | Profile Blog | |
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 conCentrate9 United States. April 13 2009 14:34. Posts 413 | Profile Blog | |
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 paper April 13 2009 14:39. Posts 7281 | Profile Blog |
you'll find your answer in a few weeks anyway when you find out she's in a new relationship
just wait it out ;s |
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 CatioN United States. April 13 2009 15:01. Posts 98 | Profile |
| I went thrrough this a after my birthday ( two days after v-day lol). I would not ask, because my ex hooked up with her best friend, a guy. But what i dont get is that she dated him before and he basically used her, then she goes around and gets with after me :O. ok ok all in all i would nto ask her, because you want to know right now but if she does say yes then it will tear you apart formthe inside..... NO! |
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| PriitM Algeria. April 13 2009 15:25. Posts 181 | Profile Blog |
| --- Nuked --- Last edit: 2009-04-13 15:26:02 |
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 Energies Australia. April 13 2009 15:29. Posts 2593 | Profile Blog |
On April 13 2009 14:14 SweeTLemonS[TPR] wrote:
(i.e. the relationship never meant anything to her, and I really wasted my time)?
Man.. if girls are driven by anything, it's their emotions, a girl will never give you the time of day or go out with you unless she's attracted to you. But that does't mean she won't lose attraction and start liking someone else if you don't put in the effort. Even if she didn't cheat on you she probably had someone else in mind. I'd say it was the long distance thing.
Anyway think about this if you're going to ask, maybe you turned her into a lesbian and she now prefers to munch rug, that is something you self esteem will be able to take? lol.Last edit: 2009-04-13 15:30:44 |
| | "Everybody wanna be a bodybuilder but dont nobody wanna lift no heavy ass weight" - Ronnie Coleman. |
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| MiniRoman Canada. April 13 2009 15:35. Posts 3261 | Profile Blog |
It'll probably start a fight and you will most likely end up pissed off somehow. Girls will say something to piss you off if you ask them a thing like that. Either they did and they say ya or they didn't and get bitchy cause you asked.
I didn't vote but I guess you could. I wouldn't unless you really needed to know. |
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 HnR)Insane United States. April 13 2009 15:37. Posts 3197 | Profile Blog |
| I guess I'll be in the minority here, but I'll say do ask her. I've been in a similar situation and lost the opportunity to ask, and now I always wonder. Just satiate your curiosity. |
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 nttea Sweden. April 13 2009 15:46. Posts 892 | Profile |
| Don't ask her, If you love her and she loves you then you don't want to know if she cheated on you. |
| | Perfectman for OZ ACE DAMNIT! still nr,1-100 LJD fan (: |
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| Mastermind Canada. April 13 2009 15:47. Posts 2954 | Profile Blog |
| At first I was going to say yes, but I decided to vote no because if she says yes then you might lose your trust in woman. If she fucked another man, why wont your next gf?? |
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| omfghi2u2 United States. April 13 2009 15:49. Posts 542 | Profile Blog |
| dont be obsessive. just move on with your life. |
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| HnR)Insane United States. April 13 2009 15:49. Posts 3197 | Profile Blog |
On April 13 2009 15:46 nttea wrote:
Don't ask her, If you love her and she loves you then you don't want to know if she cheated on you.
??? They broke up, lol. |
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