On December 28 2011 19:42 Silentness wrote: I do admit back in the past years I felt like I was involved in a stereotypical PUA situation. For any of you guys that went to Korea... there's a club in Hongdae (Seoul) called NB2 that big ass club that's like always packed. Well anyways one night I went in there and this hot Korean chick was watching me. She was slim and had a nice rack and ass (which I honestly think is rare on a slim not FAT Korean chick). I've been here for over 4 years so that's my only judgement call so there may be a ton more, but I've only seen two. Anyways like I said she was watching me so I watched her back and then I proceeded to sit right next to her. She said some weird pick up line like "Destiny must of brought us here together tonight". I thought that shit was pretty funny, but it was like she was "Picking" me up.
Anyways to continue with the PUA situation, something bad happen her two friends came out of nowhere. Her friends were pretty damn ugly to be honest, but I tried to entertain all of them, but I could see that her friends were getting jealous (COCKBLOCKING) Thank God two army dudes came out of nowhere (wingmen) and said "What's up you need help with these girls?" If it wasn't for those army guys the girl that was talking to me would of left the club with her two friends because they were being lame cockblockers. So the conclusion of the PUA situation was the two army guys started making out with the two ugly Korean chicks and dragged them off God knows where, and left me alone with the hot Korean chick. SCORE!
She insisted on going to a hotel room... and yeah game set closed.
Was a good night, but "sets" can be random.
Also sometimes you don't even have to have any game. I've seen a ton of guys swarming a chick and she looked annoyed, but I just grin at her and she smiles back and then comes toward me trying to grab my hand. What's up with that? I think some of these people out there in the clubs are putting in WAY too much work when I didn't do shit, just gave a small grin/smile and she takes the bait.
PS: If you do insist on being a "PUA" it never hurts to bring a good wingman. Someone that not only has good game + confidence, but is also very alert of his surroundings. I had a buddy of mine tell me that a girl was looking at me hardcore in another Noise Basement club in Gangnam Seoul. My dumbass wasn't paying attention so my friend had my back and told me that I was golden. So I went in for the kill and she wanted to make out with me the whole night until her damn friend and her friend's boyfriend told her it was time to leave *ugh*. Man I'm a miss Korea... I think it's actually pretty easy out here if you do just want random "sets"
I agree with what you are saying Silentness. If you are just a chill guy, somewhat socially savvy, decently attractive, and you go out a lot... you will get laid based on certain circumstances and if the girl in into you and the logistics are favorable.
Reading your semi field report. You had a lot of fucking luck going for you. The girl fucking opened YOU! And then when the obstacle came, the other dudes handled the obstacles for you!
I was talking to Adam Lyons and he told me the difference between a Natural and a master PUA. A natural puts himself in a situation where it favors him getting laid. A master PUA can get laid when the situation is against him. A natural can only continue a set when the girl is into him. Watch a natural fail when the girl is not into him. A good PUA can handle obstacles logistics and makes things happen like the fucking Matrix.
This is ultimately what your goals are. If you want to just go out a lot and get lucky once in a while, then sure, just be a normal chill cool guy and that will work. Like if that girl didn't open you and those guys didn't handle the obstacles for you, would you have gotten the lay? Maybe, maybe not. But probably not.
On December 28 2011 20:31 Sotamursu wrote: If you have a friend who's acting as a wingman, how is the ideal situation supposed to go? What should I focus on when I act as someone elses wingman?
As a wing, your only job is to occupy the other girl and to help your friend get isolation with his girl. If its a 2 set, when you first go in, its a 4 way conversation. But you quickly transition to two 1on1 conversations. Basically you slowly move away from each other, and pull the girls further away from each other so their heads are facing opposite directions. Then you basically spike her buying temperature to a high point, or in general when you think her compliance level is high enough that you can grab her away and get complete isolation.
Usually when the other guy is winging me, I say to the girl, "I'm going to grab a drink, come with me" or "come over here I have something to show you" or "come sit over here".
As a wing, I am slightly lower energy than my friend. I'm not there to lay the girl (however if shes cute and you hit it off well, even better). All I am doing is to stall her and keep her occupied. You basically don't want to creep out the girl. Hell even a platonic conversation works. You can ask more AFC rapport building questions if you want as a wing.
Basically dont cock block each other. Don't try to out shine your friend. Don't steal the show from your friend, and try to get out of group conversation and into smaller converations as soon as you can.
Here is an example of me opening a 2set
And here is my wing, Jonny coming into the set. Notice how fast the other girl voice and Jonny's voice disappears giving me and my girl complete isolation. Less than 10 seconds for isolation haha. I love Jonny.
Kinda had a feeling it was supposed to be more about isolating. We were at a club a few months ago and my friend told me he's gonna be my wingman and help me pick up a chick. I had a feeling that you don't approach a lone girl with a wingman, but he insisted on it anyway.
It was more like 2 guys trying to pick up a girl at the same time. I'm sure I fucked up things too, eg. when it looked like she wasn't going to go to the dance floor with me, my friend grabs my arms and says "let's go this chick isn't coming", then after 2 steps, he turns back and we start talking to her again. He did this twice. I should've probably just stayed there with the girl.
In the end I gave her a hug and we moved on. The "reason" for the rejection was that she was waiting for her friends, which probably was true since she was standing near the entrance doing nothing. I guess I could've stayed even longer there, but the whole conversation was starting to become a loop where I try to get her and she says no.
Normally I wouldn't give a fuck, but the whole situation just seemed so confusing and afterwards my friend told me that I failed really hard and he had to keep saving me. At first I just took his word for it, since I'm pretty sure he's better at this than I am. After thinking about it for a while I would've probably been better off alone.
Also another situation in short: - meet girl who at workplace party (only started there a few weeks ago) - shes like 26 or something and I'm 21 - she seems nerdy and not really social - really into me like 2 minutes after talking - get cockblocked big time by co-worker who's probably friendzoned by her - can't isolate her no matter what - rarely even says hi at work anymore, when every single other co-worker greets me every day
It almost seems like she's just too shy or embarassed about what happened and almost tries to avoid me.
My advice? Either say hey to her and say you had a good time talking to her at the party and ask her out sometime, or just move on. I wouldn't waste time trying to win some chick over that isn't in to you. This way you can find out quickly and easily if she is.
On December 29 2011 04:15 Catch wrote: My advice? Either say hey to her and say you had a good time talking to her at the party and ask her out sometime, or just move on. I wouldn't waste time trying to win some chick over that isn't in to you. This way you can find out quickly and easily if she is.
I told her that before I lost her that night and I'm not really trying to get her anymore. I was planning to ask her out at work after the party, but she became so distant that I pretty much moved on. I was mainly wondering about the sudden change. If I have a moment with her in the future, I'll definitely ask her out. Otherwise I feel like it'll create a very awkward situation at work, that I'd rather avoid.
On December 29 2011 02:27 Sotamursu wrote: Kinda had a feeling it was supposed to be more about isolating. We were at a club a few months ago and my friend told me he's gonna be my wingman and help me pick up a chick. I had a feeling that you don't approach a lone girl with a wingman, but he insisted on it anyway.
It was more like 2 guys trying to pick up a girl at the same time. I'm sure I fucked up things too, eg. when it looked like she wasn't going to go to the dance floor with me, my friend grabs my arms and says "let's go this chick isn't coming", then after 2 steps, he turns back and we start talking to her again. He did this twice. I should've probably just stayed there with the girl.
In the end I gave her a hug and we moved on. The "reason" for the rejection was that she was waiting for her friends, which probably was true since she was standing near the entrance doing nothing. I guess I could've stayed even longer there, but the whole conversation was starting to become a loop where I try to get her and she says no.
Normally I wouldn't give a fuck, but the whole situation just seemed so confusing and afterwards my friend told me that I failed really hard and he had to keep saving me. At first I just took his word for it, since I'm pretty sure he's better at this than I am. After thinking about it for a while I would've probably been better off alone.
Also another situation in short: - meet girl who at workplace party (only started there a few weeks ago) - shes like 26 or something and I'm 21 - she seems nerdy and not really social - really into me like 2 minutes after talking - get cockblocked big time by co-worker who's probably friendzoned by her - can't isolate her no matter what - rarely even says hi at work anymore, when every single other co-worker greets me every day
It almost seems like she's just too shy or embarassed about what happened and almost tries to avoid me.
Any advice and thoughts would be appreciated.
Yeah, never 2v1 a solo set. That's just fucking weird. Plus, when you are with another guy, the pressure is probably less on you to talk where as in a 1v1, its all you and you don't get to slack off.
Many times, there are external factors that you just don't know. For example, she is into you, but her dad died the next day and never picked up your call. If you are really dying to find out... just approach her and be like "hey last time we had a good conversation... but not sure what happened later".
Went out tonight and had a pretty awesome time. I feel like what they say is true, even though it seems kind of lame and corny. It's not the moves or what you say, these things are small contributing factors. For me the difference between success and failure is just the vibe. Relationships and sex, these aren't intellectual things. It's a union of hearts, not heads. You can analyze situations a posteriori, but this stuff has to be internalized, it can't be done on the go. Love's a feeling, and women are highly talented at empathy, sensing what you're feeling. Can't fake that with words, with intellect.
I honestly think the best advice anyone could have ever given me is that you have to validate yourself instead of letting others validate you. Women want you to invest your attention into them, but they don't want you to be too invested. The moment you're more invested into her than she is into you, and she realizes it, you're in trouble. Easiest way to fix this? Get something going on in your life.
I notice that a lot of pua "techniques" are really things that I've sort of internalized. Being funny, teasing, then a compliment, "push pull" flirting etc. "Punishing" bad behavior "oh I don't think we can be best friends any more" followed by "how can i make it up to you". Most importantly not taking the situation or yourself too seriously (unless it calls for seriousness). How people fuck it up: They just agree with everything a girl says, or say something neutral that can't be interpreted positively or negatively. If you play it too safe, you'll never polarize anyone to like you or hate you. You'll always be friends. But the point is this, by playing it safe, you're taking the situation too seriously. If she says something you don't agree with, tease her for it. But then when she does something awesome, you let her know.
PUA is honestly pretty brilliant. It analyzes certain effective behaviors of social dynamics. But for most of us, I think we already know these behaviors. We see them on television with movie stars, in successful males, etc. But we stop ourselves from doing them b/c we're too concerned with logically analyzing stuff. What should I say to her, does she like me, will she be receptive to me... who cares. Will this joke be funny, etc? Here's a truth about humor: Once people start laughing, almost anything with a shred of humor in it becomes funny. You can take the energy of the group and roll with it, without having to do much yourself. Humor is as much about the punchline as it is about the energy. This is why you can tell the same jokes some comedian tells and no one will laugh.
I hear the same thing over and over from a lot of people. Just be yourself. But the real problem is, does anyone really know what that is? Being yourself is a struggle. You have to strip away all the cultural conditioning, all the reactions to others, all the external validation. I don't think most people really know who they are, they're always reacting to stimuli, always conditioned by some event. Confidence is finding yourself and being okay with it.
I'm by no means an expert pua or even a pua at all. But I think pua has something very valuable to teach everyone. It provides deep insight into human psychology. It can teach you to discover yourself, to care about who you are, and develop yourself as a human being. I disagree completely with those that say that it's just a way to get laid or to trick a girl into sleeping with you.
On December 28 2011 19:42 Silentness wrote: I do admit back in the past years I felt like I was involved in a stereotypical PUA situation. For any of you guys that went to Korea... there's a club in Hongdae (Seoul) called NB2 that big ass club that's like always packed. Well anyways one night I went in there and this hot Korean chick was watching me. She was slim and had a nice rack and ass (which I honestly think is rare on a slim not FAT Korean chick). I've been here for over 4 years so that's my only judgement call so there may be a ton more, but I've only seen two. Anyways like I said she was watching me so I watched her back and then I proceeded to sit right next to her. She said some weird pick up line like "Destiny must of brought us here together tonight". I thought that shit was pretty funny, but it was like she was "Picking" me up.
Anyways to continue with the PUA situation, something bad happen her two friends came out of nowhere. Her friends were pretty damn ugly to be honest, but I tried to entertain all of them, but I could see that her friends were getting jealous (COCKBLOCKING) Thank God two army dudes came out of nowhere (wingmen) and said "What's up you need help with these girls?" If it wasn't for those army guys the girl that was talking to me would of left the club with her two friends because they were being lame cockblockers. So the conclusion of the PUA situation was the two army guys started making out with the two ugly Korean chicks and dragged them off God knows where, and left me alone with the hot Korean chick. SCORE!
She insisted on going to a hotel room... and yeah game set closed.
Was a good night, but "sets" can be random.
Also sometimes you don't even have to have any game. I've seen a ton of guys swarming a chick and she looked annoyed, but I just grin at her and she smiles back and then comes toward me trying to grab my hand. What's up with that? I think some of these people out there in the clubs are putting in WAY too much work when I didn't do shit, just gave a small grin/smile and she takes the bait.
PS: If you do insist on being a "PUA" it never hurts to bring a good wingman. Someone that not only has good game + confidence, but is also very alert of his surroundings. I had a buddy of mine tell me that a girl was looking at me hardcore in another Noise Basement club in Gangnam Seoul. My dumbass wasn't paying attention so my friend had my back and told me that I was golden. So I went in for the kill and she wanted to make out with me the whole night until her damn friend and her friend's boyfriend told her it was time to leave *ugh*. Man I'm a miss Korea... I think it's actually pretty easy out here if you do just want random "sets"
This NB2 place sounds so disgustingly gross to me if that's the kind of stuff that happens regularly. I'm totally feeling the Korean national hate for the American army base . . . and most foreigners who live there for that matter.
On December 29 2011 16:43 shinosai wrote: Went out tonight and had a pretty awesome time. I feel like what they say is true, even though it seems kind of lame and corny. It's not the moves or what you say, these things are small contributing factors. For me the difference between success and failure is just the vibe. Relationships and sex, these aren't intellectual things. It's a union of hearts, not heads. You can analyze situations a posteriori, but this stuff has to be internalized, it can't be done on the go. Love's a feeling, and women are highly talented at empathy, sensing what you're feeling. Can't fake that with words, with intellect.
I honestly think the best advice anyone could have ever given me is that you have to validate yourself instead of letting others validate you. Women want you to invest your attention into them, but they don't want you to be too invested. The moment you're more invested into her than she is into you, and she realizes it, you're in trouble. Easiest way to fix this? Get something going on in your life.
I notice that a lot of pua "techniques" are really things that I've sort of internalized. Being funny, teasing, then a compliment, "push pull" flirting etc. "Punishing" bad behavior "oh I don't think we can be best friends any more" followed by "how can i make it up to you". Most importantly not taking the situation or yourself too seriously (unless it calls for seriousness). How people fuck it up: They just agree with everything a girl says, or say something neutral that can't be interpreted positively or negatively. If you play it too safe, you'll never polarize anyone to like you or hate you. You'll always be friends. But the point is this, by playing it safe, you're taking the situation too seriously. If she says something you don't agree with, tease her for it. But then when she does something awesome, you let her know.
PUA is honestly pretty brilliant. It analyzes certain effective behaviors of social dynamics. But for most of us, I think we already know these behaviors. We see them on television with movie stars, in successful males, etc. But we stop ourselves from doing them b/c we're too concerned with logically analyzing stuff. What should I say to her, does she like me, will she be receptive to me... who cares. Will this joke be funny, etc? Here's a truth about humor: Once people start laughing, almost anything with a shred of humor in it becomes funny. You can take the energy of the group and roll with it, without having to do much yourself. Humor is as much about the punchline as it is about the energy. This is why you can tell the same jokes some comedian tells and no one will laugh.
I hear the same thing over and over from a lot of people. Just be yourself. But the real problem is, does anyone really know what that is? Being yourself is a struggle. You have to strip away all the cultural conditioning, all the reactions to others, all the external validation. I don't think most people really know who they are, they're always reacting to stimuli, always conditioned by some event. Confidence is finding yourself and being okay with it.
I'm by no means an expert pua or even a pua at all. But I think pua has something very valuable to teach everyone. It provides deep insight into human psychology. It can teach you to discover yourself, to care about who you are, and develop yourself as a human being. I disagree completely with those that say that it's just a way to get laid or to trick a girl into sleeping with you.
I think you really hit the nail on the head man.
Especially concerning the "vibe." The reason I look at Mark over at postmasculine as my number one "role model" (If you want to call it that), is because he basically says the same thing, but obviously on a deeper and more understanding level. After all, he has been there. Want to figure out a woman? Figure out emotions and play on an emotional level. The problem I have with most PUA stuff that I seen is way too intellectualized. This sounds bad, but it is actually true. They approach it as "If she does X at Y time, do Z." You cannot do this and be successful past a certain point in my opinion. Women are emotional creatures, not logic/fact based like we are.
For example, ever had a girl get mad at you because you went and hung out with your friends, or maybe had an exam so you didn't get to see her? Then next week, same circumstances, but she is totally fine? She isn't playing games. It's all about the emotional context that many dudes do not pick up on in my opinion. Want a quality woman? Not only should be able to identify their emotions, but you must have your own emotions down pact; you need to be able to lay everything out like that. You should be able to understand your emotions, what drives you, and truths about yourself. The better you do this, the higher quality relationships (and probably girl) you will have. At least, this is what I'm told Some of it I've started to figure out, not at all of it.
All in all, I really agreed with your post. It's pretty much how I approach things. Polarizing people is huge; you can play it safe all your life if you'd like, having everybody like you, nobody hate you, and nobody love you. Or you can just say I'm a man. This is me. Accept it or reject it. The quicker you polarize people this way, the quicker you find somebody that is really attracted to you.
Women are emotional creatures, not logic/fact based like we are.
Wow. just wow.
You're a fool if you don't think men are emotional creatures too. We just like to pretend we're not and will more aggressively rationalize our actions.
On December 29 2011 16:43 shinosai wrote: Went out tonight and had a pretty awesome time. I feel like what they say is true, even though it seems kind of lame and corny. It's not the moves or what you say, these things are small contributing factors. For me the difference between success and failure is just the vibe. Relationships and sex, these aren't intellectual things. It's a union of hearts, not heads. You can analyze situations a posteriori, but this stuff has to be internalized, it can't be done on the go. Love's a feeling, and women are highly talented at empathy, sensing what you're feeling. Can't fake that with words, with intellect.
I honestly think the best advice anyone could have ever given me is that you have to validate yourself instead of letting others validate you. Women want you to invest your attention into them, but they don't want you to be too invested. The moment you're more invested into her than she is into you, and she realizes it, you're in trouble. Easiest way to fix this? Get something going on in your life.
I notice that a lot of pua "techniques" are really things that I've sort of internalized. Being funny, teasing, then a compliment, "push pull" flirting etc. "Punishing" bad behavior "oh I don't think we can be best friends any more" followed by "how can i make it up to you". Most importantly not taking the situation or yourself too seriously (unless it calls for seriousness). How people fuck it up: They just agree with everything a girl says, or say something neutral that can't be interpreted positively or negatively. If you play it too safe, you'll never polarize anyone to like you or hate you. You'll always be friends. But the point is this, by playing it safe, you're taking the situation too seriously. If she says something you don't agree with, tease her for it. But then when she does something awesome, you let her know.
PUA is honestly pretty brilliant. It analyzes certain effective behaviors of social dynamics. But for most of us, I think we already know these behaviors. We see them on television with movie stars, in successful males, etc. But we stop ourselves from doing them b/c we're too concerned with logically analyzing stuff. What should I say to her, does she like me, will she be receptive to me... who cares. Will this joke be funny, etc? Here's a truth about humor: Once people start laughing, almost anything with a shred of humor in it becomes funny. You can take the energy of the group and roll with it, without having to do much yourself. Humor is as much about the punchline as it is about the energy. This is why you can tell the same jokes some comedian tells and no one will laugh.
I hear the same thing over and over from a lot of people. Just be yourself. But the real problem is, does anyone really know what that is? Being yourself is a struggle. You have to strip away all the cultural conditioning, all the reactions to others, all the external validation. I don't think most people really know who they are, they're always reacting to stimuli, always conditioned by some event. Confidence is finding yourself and being okay with it.
I'm by no means an expert pua or even a pua at all. But I think pua has something very valuable to teach everyone. It provides deep insight into human psychology. It can teach you to discover yourself, to care about who you are, and develop yourself as a human being. I disagree completely with those that say that it's just a way to get laid or to trick a girl into sleeping with you.
I think you really hit the nail on the head man.
Especially concerning the "vibe." The reason I look at Mark over at postmasculine as my number one "role model" (If you want to call it that), is because he basically says the same thing, but obviously on a deeper and more understanding level. After all, he has been there. Want to figure out a woman? Figure out emotions and play on an emotional level. The problem I have with most PUA stuff that I seen is way too intellectualized. This sounds bad, but it is actually true. They approach it as "If she does X at Y time, do Z." You cannot do this and be successful past a certain point in my opinion. Women are emotional creatures, not logic/fact based like we are.
For example, ever had a girl get mad at you because you went and hung out with your friends, or maybe had an exam so you didn't get to see her? Then next week, same circumstances, but she is totally fine? She isn't playing games. It's all about the emotional context that many dudes do not pick up on in my opinion. Want a quality woman? Not only should be able to identify their emotions, but you must have your own emotions down pact; you need to be able to lay everything out like that. You should be able to understand your emotions, what drives you, and truths about yourself. The better you do this, the higher quality relationships (and probably girl) you will have. At least, this is what I'm told Some of it I've started to figure out, not at all of it.
All in all, I really agreed with your post. It's pretty much how I approach things. Polarizing people is huge; you can play it safe all your life if you'd like, having everybody like you, nobody hate you, and nobody love you. Or you can just say I'm a man. This is me. Accept it or reject it. The quicker you polarize people this way, the quicker you find somebody that is really attracted to you.
Nice catch man (lol) But I very much concur on what you've wrote about the "emotional" nature of women. This is what I feel too. Prior to picking up 'game', I saw two circumstances where this girl who have dated two difference guys one after another. Now this is the time where everyone is reaching the legal age to drive, so people were taking up driver's school. First guy who she went out had to execuse himself for a lesson same day it was her birthday while he is suppose to have lunch with her. She was totally fine with it. Second guy who she went out with had the exact same problem and had a lesson. To my big surprise she went berserk when he announced his near distant absence.
Flashforward couple of month later. I've recalled on the posture and tone that the first guy took when approaching such problem. He did in a such suave way like he was really straightforward about it but also have this unfortunate vibe thing going on. It felt like he was the guy that we are suppose to feel sorry for and not vice versa. That is what I call 'gg'.
Second guy was really uncomfortable when delivering the message, he was stuttering, he was leaning very forward when they first engaged. He was displaying all signs of 'betatude'. So I concluded that she felt that weak presence of his and wanted to increase his manliness. That method turns out to be yelling at him in front of public, hoping that he would listen to her and stand up to his teacher when he tried to reschedule.
It was so surreal to witness both scenerios unfold. If the second guy would follow the ex's footstep, she could have been way less dominant.
Women are emotional creatures, not logic/fact based like we are.
Wow. just wow.
You're a fool if you don't think men are emotional creatures too. We just like to pretend we're not and will more aggressively rationalize our actions.
Yes men are emotional too. But women are as much as ten-fold more than we are. During high school, not one dude cried the morning after intercourse. And just by looking at the women around after an one night stand, they all had red eyes (signs of lamentation). Women are way more emotional invested than men. They feel that the one night stand must have more meaning than just a simple fling.
On June 03 2011 00:09 bonifaceviii wrote: There are better ways to improve self-confidence than by objectifying women.
Saw this in the side bar and felt the need to quote one of the first comments in response to this post... Well said.
If you have the need to objectify women, you're being a jerk that wants to get laid.
If you're good, you'll raise her confidence and her self-esteem by picking her up. Without her crying after you but with a smile and a "Yeah, that guy... he's cool. Just sadly not the type for a relationship, I guess."
A wannabe PUA (or natural) without manners nor morale is someone who I enjoy blowing up a lot. Fuck those wankers, they're making it harder for me to get the same girl because they're all about fucking her up. No, thx.
Can't remember where exactly it was on the previous page but @"JUST BE YOURSELF DUDE NO NEED FOR FAKE SHIT LOL":
"Be yourself" is the typical advice you'd get from your mom or a girl friend when going out on a date. Guess why it doesn't work.
The "yourself" in most cases is scared and afraid. Afraid of rejection. Scared of touching a girl. Afraid of being humiliated. Why? Because it happened in your past. And again. And again.
The goal should never be to "just be yourself", no matter the situation. Ever. Now, trying to be your best possible self, that's a whole different story.
Yes, people might start with pickup cause they want to become better at women, cause they want to get laid more, blablabla. Past a certain level, all that initial reasoning is bullshit. You won't get past a certain level unless you work on yourself. How you perceive, how you frame the world itself. The people who are like LOLFUCKTHATSHITIMAGOAPPROACHMORE are the same people who end up depressed, as borderliners and feeling "cold" and "distant". That's your typical "social robot".
tl;dr: Whoever says "Just be yourself" has: a) no clue about what they just said. b) is so far down the road of personal growths that they don't even see how they started anymore. c) had perfect life with perfect parents and a perfect youth.
@the "lol i hate going out with noobs"-discussion: If you ever go out with so called "PUAs" (which is most likely ten people hiding in a corner talking about which openers they should use on which chick to avoid approaching and like one dude who pisses off sooner or later to do something), don't be that guy that drags down other people. If there's a person that does stuff, ask him how you can wing him. Don't be the awkward guy that stands next to him saying nothing. Don't be the guy ruining other peoples sets.
I remember stuff like people walking past me giving me thumbs ups in a way the fucking girl could see it. I remember guys standing there until the girl asks "and who are you?", just to say nothing or stutter their name. Congrats, you're giving the guy you're rolling with the chance to lose the set or blow you off. "Oh, that's the best friend of my sister who drove us here. He's kinda shy but totally cute once you get to know him."
On the other hand, if you're more experienced use any chance you can get to loosen those newbs up, it helps a lot. I've taken my gf out "with those PUA guys" a few times. Shit gets funny if she's standing in the middle of them while you grab a drink and you approach a random 4+ set being like "Hey, hey girls. Hold on. See that girl there? Yeah, the one surrounded by those weirdos. I'm totally into her, but I can't get those guys off her. Can you like, distract them for a while?"
Or my all time fav (guess it only works for euros): Approach a random girl asking if she speaks english and tell her that you've got this exchange student who's totally embarassed about speaking (insert native language here) over and you just HAVE to go deal with your drunk gf for like ten minutes and you need someone to show him this club real quick. INSIST on her only speaking english with him. So much fun to be had.
Oh, or go ahead and do retarded stuff. I've made sets hook (streetgame) by standing awkwardly next to a waiting girl and looking over to her and down on the floor. And again. And using that shy smile. And once you get her attention you can be like "Hi. I'm kinda shy." ... "?!?!" ... "But I think you're really cute." and see her brain explode.
Use stupid openers that no girl will get and tease her for not getting it. "HEY, YOU, LISTEN WE NEED SOME HELP HERE. THIS GUY IS CLAIMING THAT ZERGLINGS CAN BEAT FIREBEATS IF YOU MICRO THEM PROPERLY AND I NEED SOMEONE ELSE TO TELL HIM THATS RETARDED, COME ON HELP ME OUT HERE. WTF YOU DONT KNOW WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT?!?! WHAT KINDA NERD ARE YOU WTF."
I once had some goth girl bugging me all night about what I meant by saying "I think if you'd be an Arbiter I'd make sure to always EMP you so you could never stasis me away." and walking away.
As long as people perceive you as someone who's talking to a lot of people at a certain setting you can create attraction with the most stupid stuff ever. Approach girl group A. Tell them some short crazy story, WALK AWAY and they'll have that mix of "WTF?!" and giggling behind you. Go to group B ask them how they're doing, walk away. Get a drink. Approach random girl that saw positive responses from both groups with something that makes NO SENSE AT ALL and ask her an hour later if she has it figured out already, cause the other gals already got it.
Stop pretending that interacting with girls is hard. It's not. It's the most natural thing to do for a human being. More natural than brushing your teeth or using toiletpaper to wipe your ass. You've just never tried it. Or you forgot about it.
The difference between men and women is often poorly stated and misunderstood. Men are not more logical than women; women are equally logical, but they use a different type of logic. In terms of psychology, women have certain problems that men don't. A woman has a biological desire for sex, but she can only bring one baby into the world, and she will be stuck with it for a long time. This is why women tend towards constancy, men towards inconstancy. Consequently, men who sleep around are studs, women who do so are judged harshly, as their nature is toward constancy.
So, then, what's the problem? Well, if a woman were to use male logic, she would easily and often be taken advantage of. If a woman simply paid attention to a man's actions and what he says, it would be completely easy for every nerd on this forum to fuck as many women as he wants, and then screw them over afterward. Obviously, this isn't the case, though. A woman isn't easily fooled by sleazy pick up lines or pua "techniques" by themselves. She sees right through the fake personalities of bad pick up artists. Do men have this problem? Obviously not. We aren't burdened by children, so if we happen to pick up a girl that's absolutely crazy, we just move on to the next one. Can the woman move on? No. She needs to be more selective, which means that she needs to develop survival strategies to understand a man's true intentions. As a man, we don't care what a woman's real intentions are for the most part.
Females use logic not based on actions and words but on emotions. Their decisions often seem irrational to us, because we don't see what they see, but if we did, their actions would be quite logical. It's not that women are more emotional than men, then, or that men are more logical..... rather, it's that women understand emotions in a logical way. You'll never really "get" it, though, because it'd be like trying to see a color that's not in the spectrum. It's a different way of thinking.
If anyone should be a PUA coach, it's Cella. That guy is a pimp. Megumi wasn't reciprocating when Cella asked for a kiss over her stream so he left, only to have Megumi constantly ask where Cella went. Where did he go? Moved on to Cheeky Duck. Lol @ these nerds calling Cella a creep over his pimp game. That man knows whatsup.
On January 01 2012 03:26 matiK23 wrote: Too many keyboard jockeys in here and too much theory crafting, rather than actual pussy grabbing. This thread fails.
Agreed somewhat. Gotta have somewhere to talk about it though.
I failed last night with a girl I was attracted to. It just was a downward spiral, even though I think she was trying to make herself available.