I apologize for the length but this topic is currently near and dear to me at this current moment in my life. I will appreciate any and all who take the time to read and comment on the following text.
Thank you all very kindly.
I would like to believe that many people who frequent the TL Forum are introverted by nature. I realize that extroverted nerds exist as well but extroverted persons are less likely to suffer from the disorders I am about to described and discuss.
Most of us are familiar with the term "Ladder Anxiety". For those of you who are unfamiliar, Ladder Anxiety is an apprehension that makes pressing that little button down in the bottom left hand corner of your screen either extremely difficult or impossible all together.
For those of you who experience this apprehension, you know what it feels like.
To those who cannot comprehend this ordeal, people like myself spend all waking hours of the day going over strategy in our heads while at work or school and when it comes time to turn the computer on and get down to business... fear and dread consume all hope for putting that strategic theory to physical practice.
I have struggled with social anxiety my entire life. I simply just do not like people. Although I despise the human race as a whole, I realize it is still necessary to maintain deep and meaningful relationships with other individuals.
I have a girlfriend of almost 6 years and I live with two male friends whom I share a mutually beneficial relationship. We pitch in to pay for a home/food together and craft the stars.
That being said, I have never made prolonged eye contact with anyone in my life. I can see in to a persons soul. (I'm not here to argue whether or not a soul exists tangibly)
Typically, with a short glance, I can peer in to the windows of a man and read him. I can see his pain, anger, happiness, sorrow, fear etc. etc. etc. My senses become so overwhelmed around people that I have decided that I will just avoid social situations all together if it can be helped.
Recently I moved in to my current home because my friend's father is super sick (as in awesome) and said we could just take over the mortgage. He forgot to mention that when it rains, it's time for all arachnids to move in-doors. I have always known that I despise spiders more than humans but today I write about the construction of a legitimate full blown phobia.
I never thought it could happen to me but now whenever an eight legged freak begins trotting across my wall to bid me a "SUP BRAH",
My alertness increases ten fold I begin to almost hyperventilate My heart begins to palpitate I feel excessive amounts of adrenaline course through my body and I simply cannot move any part of my body no matter how many signals I send
- This is the most embarrassing thing I have ever admitted - I have not slept in two weeks. I am a 21 year old male and last night after throwing my blankets off of my bed and turning on the light to see what the hell brushed over my foot for the 598th time, I walked in to the living room... sat down on the couch... and cried for a hour and a half straight.
My life is crashing down around me and no one will take me seriously. I would love for this all to go away and be 'normal' but unfortunately I have succumbed to the belief that I am a wet vagina.
TL;DR:
I recently acquired an overwhelming phobia on top of my pre-existing anxiety disorder.
How many of you suffer from similar ailments and what do you do to remedy them?
Please provide information about your specific anxiety problem and how you CURRENTLY suffer from or defeat it.
ZaplinG United States. June 06 2012 16:55. Posts 3804
Yeah, the guy above is right. Anxiety disorders are the most common of psychological issues, but are also fairly easily remedied if you're able to find professional help. Look up a decent psychotherapist and you should be ok soon enough
Good luck!
Aerisky United States. June 06 2012 17:06. Posts 9565
As the first two replies said, go find professional medical help as soon as possible. Living life suffering panic attacks and whatnot will be downright terrible, and if you're somehow able to overcome or learn to cope (though arguably that's not your ultimate goal), it will help you immensely.
"It has always been in my observation of human nature, that a man who has any good reason to believe in himself never flourishes himself before the faces of other people in order that they may believe in him."
As mentioned, you should seek medical attention, and needless to say there is no shame in that. I have also had issues of this nature, and doctors can help in a lot of cases. Also, you must realize that these problems are not manifestations of your character, so it`s unfair to mark it "wet vagina" behavior.
Anyway, good luck and get well soon !
"BO for girls: @8 movie, @10 dinner , around 12 I lean in for the kiss and if that messes up, I try to get back with a little bit of harassment." Day[9]
Overall, it's impossible for people to live without worry. I have similar experiences where I cannot seem to go to sleep at night and randomly start crying for no clear reason. My problem is mostly agoraphobia (fear of crowded places) and I deal with it by listening to white noise on my phone or digital media player. It definitely helps to calm myself.
However, there was a time in university about one year ago where I was extremely stressed out every day which caused me to have constant nausea. The condition worsened so much that I lost about 7 pounds in one week. After seeing doctors who told me varying degrees of useless information, I sought out an acupuncturist at the request of my worried parents. I have no idea how they do it, but it works. After a few sessions, my stress levels were considerately lowered.
Nowadays, whenever I do feel anxiety attacks, I take about 2-3 drops of Bach Flower remedies under the tongue. Specifically, I use the agrimony, aspen, rock rose, and Star of Bethlehem essences. In your case, I might take the Rescue Remedy.
In the end, I just try not to think about things too, too much.
MaZza[KIS] Australia. June 06 2012 17:10. Posts 1666
Your anxiety disorder (social or otherwise, you really need a doctor to correctly diagnose it) is contributing and/or has triggered/is contributing to your phobia.
Possible treatments in order of IMPORTANCE:
1. Psychotherapy - get diagnosed, get the disorder and and phobia appropriately diagnosed and classified 2. Antidepressants (SSRIs) 3. EXERCISE!!!!! Nothing releases serotonin better (naturally)
I suffer panic attacks... when I get busy with work, can't exercise, etc. I develop paranoia and have panic attacks. As soon as I clean up my life, start eating better, get back to exercising and sleeping properly (because I have time) I start feeling 100% better instantly.
I have never taken drugs or seen a psychiatrist/doctor but both have been recommended, as everybody tells me anxiety is very easily treatable.
I really wanted a bigger opponent, like Nate Marquardt, or King Neptune, or Zeus, or Zeus and Fedor, or Fedor on Zeus's shoulders, and they can both punch but only Zeus can kick.
Basically, confront your fears small steps at a time. Gradually, you'll learn to control them. I did, too, have a bit of social anxiety when I was younger, but somehow I managed to apply for a part-time job at the register of my local grocery store. It worked wonders
Also, the looking into eye thing, I know that some people with Asperger's Syndrome have real trouble with eye contact and some say that they simply "do not like people" and that their senses become overwhelmed when they are close to other people, because they try to figure out what they're like. Of course, people without Asperger's have trouble with eye contact too, or doesn't like people for various reasons, but there seems to be quite a few people who have it and don't know it, so I thought I'd mention it. Read up on it and see if you recognize yourself in the description and keep in mind that there are various "degrees" of Asperger's, so you may not recognize all of it. But if you do, it may help you to understand yourself better, which in turn will help you if you have any specific problems you want to overcome. And if you don't recognize yourself in it, then it was a complete miss on my part
krycess United States. June 06 2012 17:16. Posts 36
On June 06 2012 17:09 hiryuukatana wrote: Overall, it's impossible for people to live without worry. I have similar experiences where I cannot seem to go to sleep at night and randomly start crying for no clear reason. My problem is mostly agoraphobia (fear of crowded places) and I deal with it by listening to white noise on my phone or digital media player. It definitely helps to calm myself.
However, there was a time in university about one year ago where I was extremely stressed out every day which caused me to have constant nausea. The condition worsened so much that I lost about 7 pounds in one week. After seeing doctors who told me varying degrees of useless information, I sought out an acupuncturist at the request of my worried parents. I have no idea how they do it, but it works. After a few sessions, my stress levels were considerately lowered.
Nowadays, whenever I do feel anxiety attacks, I take about 2-3 drops of Bach Flower remedies under the tongue. Specifically, I use the agrimony, aspen, rock rose, and Star of Bethlehem essences. In your case, I might take the Rescue Remedy.
In the end, I just try not to think about things too, too much.
I am very malnourished due to neverceasing nausea. I think it is due to stress. Someone once suggested acupuncture for me as well. I'll definitely try the drops though!
First of all, this story is f- hilarious. Second, that f- sucks. I used to have ladder anxiety in 1v1, but then I just stopped playing sc2, then i kept coming back on and I still had it. Eventually after taking multiple breaks from sc2 I got over it, I stopped thinking about it and even then I STILL dont play it. I simply enjoy playing team games such as 4v4 more then playing by myself.
Seeing as you're asking advice on a gaming forum I assume you're willing to find people that are struggling with the same problem you're facing, it's much easier to do something with another person then yourself. I'm not that educated but I can tell you that, YOU DONT HAVE TO STRUGGLE BY YOURSELF, work with other people, try things out, build up your confidence and move on. That's just about as much advice as a forum lurker such as myself that only posts when he feels his opinion REALLY matters can tell you. If you want reliable, professional help, seek medical attention, there's just no way around it unfortunately.
I get the 1v1 jitters but I feel like its mainly because of my attempt to protect my ego that stops me from hitting that 1v1 button, Im perfectly fine with doing team games.
About that spider business, I get that "feeling" too sometimes because for anyone that has found a bug in their bed thats one thing you don't forget. The way I get around it that I sleep with my limbs anchoring down all sides of blankets down in a way that I know a spider can not get into/under my "hermetically sealed" covers aka my limbs never protrude out from under my covers, but of course you need to breathe so I always make a little hole in my covers so I breathe. Sleeping like this makes me feel safe, and I always have done this because I used to be scared of the dark in my childhood, and I always thought a creep was going to bust out of my closet or from under my bed, and I felt that the covers protected me, almost made me invisible from them. Sleeping like this made my parents think I was going to suffocate in my sleep, but I'm still alive today so.... when you finally fall asleep you'll normalize to a non bundled up position. Additionally I too sometimes feel those "brush up against your body" feeling; almost like an insect. I use to freak out and slap the spot where I felt it but now I just ignore it and eventually it stuck and I dont get freaked out my shit randomly brushing me in my sleep.
Now for fear of spiders outside of the bed. I live in Chinatown, and that entails cockroaches in my apartment, they sometimes freak me out at night but I have also gotten use to it. A way my mind coped with the fear of insects is that I would turn my fear into anger. I would channel the anger into pummeling the fuck out of any bug that surprised me. The anger would come from thoughts such as "How dare this little piece of shit make ME scared and how dare it embarrass me by making me scared , How dare it invade my living space." You can guess that any cockroach I find gets half a gallon of raid sprayed on it :D
sluggaslamoo Australia. June 06 2012 17:17. Posts 3603
Yeah I had it. I was pretty screwed for 2 years because I thought I was going to die every day and had pretty bad depression. This was around when I was 13-16 years old.
Then I just somehow said fuck it, I don't care if I die, basically went away after a couple of months.
It obviously still affects my life, but its not even close to how bad it used to affect me. I just learned that its just my brain trying to freak me out over tiny things, so whenever I feel a panic attack coming on, I've learned to not care until it goes away. A part from that I have made an attempt to not get stressed out over stuff and try and live a relaxing life.
Interestingly getting good at this has helped me cope well with stuff the makes other people nervous, like stage fright. To me nothing is close to as frightening as a panic attack. So everything else has become a cakewalk (for the most part anyway).
Psycologists didn't help me, they only confirmed what I already knew, and I didn't wanna take meds. Although meds aren't given out like they are in the US.
Last edit: 2012-06-06 17:21:02
krycess United States. June 06 2012 17:28. Posts 36
I may have it, I just thought I was extremely shy though. I get really nervous and nauseous when I'm in social situations, but it's kinda weird because it's mostly with people who I know (like classmates or family members). Things like graduation (which was recent btw :D), going to different stores or restaurants, basically anywhere local where I might encounter someone I know really scares me for some reason. I think it might be because since I know them I feel like I have to get in a more in-depth conversation or something? Not sure, but I can make small talk with random people reasonably well.
Sorry for (potentially) hijacking this thread, hope you get help soon OP.
About ladder anxiety i have a tip for those who suffer from it.
Just play the game for fun and don't care about if you'll win or lose. Just play relaxed and don't think of it as such an important thing.
It's just a ladder in a videogame. It's not a date with a super hot girl.
You won't find the game fun anyways if you're gonna be nervous all the time. Remove yourself from the seriousness.
Compare the importance of a somewhat meaningless ladder match VS your real life issues and then you will see how silly it is to be nervous about something like that.
So what if you lose some ladder points? So what if you're in bronze league? So what if you're afraid of losing against some noob? It's not about life or death. Just relax!
Be yourself! I love teamliquid :)
sluggaslamoo Australia. June 06 2012 17:57. Posts 3603
Basically, confront your fears small steps at a time. Gradually, you'll learn to control them. I did, too, have a bit of social anxiety when I was younger, but somehow I managed to apply for a part-time job at the register of my local grocery store. It worked wonders
Also, the looking into eye thing, I know that some people with Asperger's Syndrome have real trouble with eye contact and some say that they simply "do not like people" and that their senses become overwhelmed when they are close to other people, because they try to figure out what they're like. Of course, people without Asperger's have trouble with eye contact too, or doesn't like people for various reasons, but there seems to be quite a few people who have it and don't know it, so I thought I'd mention it. Read up on it and see if you recognize yourself in the description and keep in mind that there are various "degrees" of Asperger's, so you may not recognize all of it. But if you do, it may help you to understand yourself better, which in turn will help you if you have any specific problems you want to overcome. And if you don't recognize yourself in it, then it was a complete miss on my part
Problem is that exposure therapy won't treat an anxiety disorder.
Your brain just tries to find things that will scare you, no matter how ridiculous it is. So for example someone with arachnophobia will be fully treated, but someone with anxiety will just find something else that will scare them. You may not be fearful of spiders anymore, but now you will be fearful of ants or rocks.
I was fearful of extra-terrestrial life (its pretty funny looking back at it). Now how will exposure therapy help with that? I'm not scared of images or movies with aliens, or crop circles, I was scared of real aliens haha.
You are on the right track though, the way I got over it, was confronting the actual fear itself. Rather than the manifestations of the fear.
I've been diagnosed with agoraphobia about 10 years ago, which developed itself after an accident I've been in around 15 years ago. The symptoms you describe are pretty much the things that I experience whenever I'm having an episode, except for the freezing up part. I do get an extreme feeling I will faint during an episode, which does cause me to hyperventilate. After very severe episode simply crash of exhaustion for a few hours, after which I sometimes can't sleep anymore for days. I do not consider myself to be having a social problem, so I can't related to that part of your problem, but panic disorders come in a large variaty.
My situation improved pretty much at the point when I realised I couldn't go on like this anymore, and searched for help. There were pretty much only 2 options for me, either get into therapy or start antidepressant. I would really advice against medication, because it will not resolve your problem. The day you stop taking it, you are back at the start again.
Whenever you choose to go down the therapy road, you have to realise that there is a very big chance it will not resolve your disorder. What it CAN do, is make you able to handle attacks whenever you get into them, eventually their frequency will drop, but never will the be totally gone. Exercise helps, not only in general, but also when you are having an attack. In the starting period, whenever I had an attack, I would just go out and run or bike, it forces your breathing pattern to change and can help tremendously to push back an attack.
Try to remove as much stress factors as possible. I hardly ever drink coffee anymore, to much caffeine in my system can induce an attack whenever im put in a high stress situation. I stopped smoking cigarettes and canabis, since both didn't have a positive influence. I severely cut down my alcohol consumption. I've never experienced attacks when I was under the influence of alcohol, however I've had most of my strongest attacks when I was hungover (badly) The hardest part was getting my body into a structured sleeping pattern, but it both helps getting yourself well rested, and it makes it easier getting you metabolism in check.
I've had my disorder under good control for about 5 years now. The only times I've had attacks have been in air planes, but I've had some diazepam pills to calm me down form the doc. I've been cutting them down ever since, and at the moment only use a really low dosage whenever I fly.
I hope you can manage to snap out of it, good luck
It was really hard doing job interviews. Kept thinking they'd hate me, or once hiring me I would be so terrible they'd fire me on the first day. Its hard to 'exude confidence' when you struggle to not think these things.
But ya, best advice I ever got was 'face your fears'. Cliche but 90% of the time what you are afraid of isn't so bad. If you force yourself into certain situations instead of avoiding it you quickly realise its not so bad.
On June 06 2012 18:07 Stimp wrote: It was really hard doing job interviews. Kept thinking they'd hate me, or once hiring me I would be so terrible they'd fire me on the first day. Its hard to 'exude confidence' when you struggle to not think these things.
But ya, best advice I ever got was 'face your fears'. Cliche but 90% of the time what you are afraid of isn't so bad. If you force yourself into certain situations instead of avoiding it you quickly realise its not so bad.
You are very right about that. Can't change if you don't do anything about it.
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Waterflow Sweden. June 06 2012 17:51. Posts 1339
