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who I haven't really spent any time with past the age of 12ish~ today.
My cell started ringing and it said 'private number', so I just answered it. It was really awkward at first, but then it just became a little weird. He basically said "whats up", since we don't know that much about eachother really. Asked how college was going, whether I got a driver's license and/or car yet, work, etc. Overall the call lasted 47 minutes.
My parents split up when I was about 7-8 or so, and finally got a divorce when I was like 12ish~. Up until now I didn't even know where he lived, what he was doing for a living, what he looked like(he emailed me a picture after), etc.
I guess it's a good thing, but I could kind of care less at this point. I don't think of him as my dad when I see or talk to him, more of just a stranger.
I just feel like watching SC now and not thinking about it :0
Also, got C- again on iCCup today. Getting closer to C
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You are having a way more interesting life than I have.
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Shows that he still cares, you should go meet him.
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On September 26 2009 14:16 dinmsab wrote:Shows that he still cares, you should go meet him. That's true. I'm thinking of it when winter comes around and I have some time off work/school
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On September 26 2009 14:16 dinmsab wrote:Shows that he still cares, you should go meet him.
Not being in contact with your son for pretty much all of his teenage years isn't what I'd call caring. =/
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There are some days where I feel really... nostalgic, i guess is the correct word. I feel worried about the future of, and i choose this topic because it's popular here, the future of starcraft when sc2 comes out. What will happen to TL? Will huge projects like tlpd be all just a waste? etc etc
Other days I really don't give a shit. There's no such thing as fate. Someone started TLPD, and if it ends up nobody caring about starcraft in the future, than that's life.
I'm sort of feeling the first vibe from your father, and the second from you. I, of course, can't know, and I mean absolutely zero disrespect or insult.
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Woah this reminds me of an episode from the Fresh Prince.
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On September 26 2009 14:29 Orome wrote:Show nested quote +On September 26 2009 14:16 dinmsab wrote:Shows that he still cares, you should go meet him. Not being in contact with your son for pretty much all of his teenage years isn't what I'd call caring. =/
I bet the dad paid for most of his living expenses during his teenage years.. correct me if im wrong, but i think that's how it's suppose to work. Sure he's been missing for a few years, on the bright side though, you still have plenty of time to make things better again.. Divorce or not, he's still the op's dad.
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On September 26 2009 14:29 Orome wrote:Show nested quote +On September 26 2009 14:16 dinmsab wrote:Shows that he still cares, you should go meet him. Not being in contact with your son for pretty much all of his teenage years isn't what I'd call caring. =/
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On September 26 2009 14:29 Orome wrote:Show nested quote +On September 26 2009 14:16 dinmsab wrote:Shows that he still cares, you should go meet him. Not being in contact with your son for pretty much all of his teenage years isn't what I'd call caring. =/
True, but you dont know everything about the divorce and the circumstance. Something bad could've happened and his dad couldnt contact or whatever.. buttttt yeahhh your dad is kinda mean for not caring about you all your teenage life
Good luck with it anyways
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On September 26 2009 15:06 dinmsab wrote:Show nested quote +On September 26 2009 14:29 Orome wrote:On September 26 2009 14:16 dinmsab wrote:Shows that he still cares, you should go meet him. Not being in contact with your son for pretty much all of his teenage years isn't what I'd call caring. =/ I bet the dad paid for most of his living expenses during his teenage years.. correct me if im wrong, but i think that's how it's suppose to work. Sure he's been missing for a few years, on the bright side though, you still have plenty of time to make things better again.. Divorce or not, he's still the op's dad. Actually, all my mom got was approx. 65$ a month from him for me, nothing more. And between age 7-12 I would only see him every couple months or so. My mom still rages about that stuff till this day ~_~
On September 26 2009 14:38 RoieTRS wrote: There are some days where I feel really... nostalgic, i guess is the correct word. I feel worried about the future of, and i choose this topic because it's popular here, the future of starcraft when sc2 comes out. What will happen to TL? Will huge projects like tlpd be all just a waste? etc etc
Other days I really don't give a shit. There's no such thing as fate. Someone started TLPD, and if it ends up nobody caring about starcraft in the future, than that's life.
I'm sort of feeling the first vibe from your father, and the second from you. I, of course, can't know, and I mean absolutely zero disrespect or insult. ^(response to dinmsab)Which is where I probably get that attitude from. Kind of like a 'boy who cried wolf' thing, with him promising all this stuff to us time after time when me and my brothers were younger, but he just ended up moving away.
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i'm in a similar situation and i really think you should simply force yourself to talk to him more. it's just as much your fault for not taking initiative as it is his for not keeping in touch for you. very difficult (gets annoying, especially when its easy to just erase that part of your life) but its either that or lose a member of your family. i do it because i'm holding out for a day in the future when i can sit back and drink a beer with a dad who left me years ago as a son who forgave him years ago.
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On September 26 2009 15:34 redtooth wrote: it's just as much your fault for not taking initiative as it is his for not keeping in touch for you.
bullshit
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On September 26 2009 14:29 Orome wrote:Show nested quote +On September 26 2009 14:16 dinmsab wrote:Shows that he still cares, you should go meet him. Not being in contact with your son for pretty much all of his teenage years is called being smart.
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wow, lots of foolish comments being tossed around, but hey it's the internet.
your dad i'm sure cares a lot about you, and if you want to continue or develop that relationship, you're going to have to accept whatever mistakes were made because its too late to change them. you have to make the best of it going forward.
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pretty cool that the call lasted so long - that in itself is a victory
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and it's "couldn't care" less, not "could care less" DUCY?
the more you know!
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It's all good man, just even so that he wasn't there all of your teenage life, his now trying to make amends. Go and have a good time with your father, I mean we all have issues and it's great that your father is there to see you. Better to have someone caring for you than no one at all.
Besides, lets just say.. better late than never
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On September 26 2009 15:54 niteReloaded wrote:Show nested quote +On September 26 2009 14:29 Orome wrote:On September 26 2009 14:16 dinmsab wrote:Shows that he still cares, you should go meet him. Not being in contact with your son for pretty much all of his teenage years is called being smart.
Win.
But really, this is pretty serious, and when it comes to family you really shouldn't joke about shit like that.
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We've all heard stories of adoptive/separated kids who really want to get to know their biological parents to the point where they seek them out. But there are also kids who are cool with their situation and really don't care either way.
You seem more like the latter but it's up to you. Meet him if you want or don't lol.
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I am going to go meet him, I'm just saying I'm not the type who would feel like I'm missing something in my life if he didn't call.
I didn't even have his number to call him myself up until now.
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Let me preface my post by saying that redtooth is full of shit and doesn't know what he's talking about, so ignore him. It's not the child's responsibility to keep in touch with a parent who has been missing for a great part of his life.
My advice, or what I think, is that perhaps something happened in your dad's life that made him reflect back on you and that he actually is trying to make a difference. What his motives are, I don't know. Maybe he's afraid he doesn't have much of an RRSP to retire comfortably, and he wants a free ride from his grown son, or maybe he watched Oprah recently and realized that he needs you just as much as you need him, in your life.
All in all, I would say it's better to know that there is 1+ person out there who cares about you, than nothing. Your dad, based on what you've told us, seems to want to get back into your life. He may have realized he missed out on enough of your life, and that he doesn't want to miss out on anymore. Or maybe he planned this out methodically, and now that you're over 18, he can get to know you better without having to take responsibility and pay full child support. Whatever the case, at least get to know him better because this is all just speculation, and maybe his intentions really are good. Maybe he's sorry for his mistakes. But don't make the mistake of just dropping him from your life, because it can really benefit you too. Definitely check out his motives though, because if he's only using you (like some deadbeat dads), than you can just forget about him. But as it stands, you have nothing to lose.
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Thanks for the comments/feedback.
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My parents divorced when I was like 8. My dad left me, my mom and my little sis for another woman. It's one thing that you love someone else, but neglecting your kids is just bad. He's that type. He didn't give half a rat ass about me and my sis for like 10 years, no call, no mail, no financial aid, whatsoever. He only gave my mum a call when my granddad passed away, and asked me and my sis to attend his funeral. I was like "go fuck yourself" and left. My mum was mad at me because I was being rude but I didn't care. My grandparents (my dad's parents) were assholes as well. They asked my dad to quickly leave my mom so that they could get more money from him (my dad's income was initially divided into two, for his parents and for our family).
My mum had to single-handedly bring us up till I was 14, then she met my step-dad who turned out to be a pretty cool guy. I used to hate my dad for leaving us, but now to think about it, it might be a fortunate thing. My step-dad is English-educated (well, in Vietnam, not many people are), so he takes education very seriously. He did his best to provide me and my sis with a better education environment, and it worked out pretty well. Not sure if my dad could have done the same thing to us, probably not since he's a dick anyway.
It's 4:30 AM, and i can't sleep.
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good luck. hopefully he doesnt have suspicious motives for trying to meet up. but for the fool saying that it is the childs responsiblity to contact their parents to keep in touch? bullshit. personally i would have nothing to do with the fucker but yeah. good luck.
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51136 Posts
the question i'm wondering is how the hell did he get your number
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Don't let him take your kidney!
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I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU TOLD A FAKE STORY JUST TO SAY YOU GOT TO C- ON ICCUP ANOTHER FUCKING C- ICCUP BLOG
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On September 26 2009 15:54 niteReloaded wrote:Show nested quote +On September 26 2009 14:29 Orome wrote:On September 26 2009 14:16 dinmsab wrote:Shows that he still cares, you should go meet him. Not being in contact with your son for pretty much all of his teenage years is called being smart. agreed
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On September 27 2009 10:20 YPang wrote:Show nested quote +On September 26 2009 15:54 niteReloaded wrote:On September 26 2009 14:29 Orome wrote:On September 26 2009 14:16 dinmsab wrote:Shows that he still cares, you should go meet him. Not being in contact with your son for pretty much all of his teenage years is called being smart. agreed +7
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Damn at least you got to talk with your father. mine not even one phone call from where is he every since I moved to America.
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United States4796 Posts
On September 27 2009 10:17 MYM.Testie wrote: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU TOLD A FAKE STORY JUST TO SAY YOU GOT TO C- ON ICCUP ANOTHER FUCKING C- ICCUP BLOG
Lol Testie.
Anyway, good luck with meeting your dad, Grob. Keep us updated.
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On September 27 2009 09:08 GTR wrote: the question i'm wondering is how the hell did he get your number Probably from my half sister (my dad was had 1 daughter before he met my mom) who was keeping in touch with him apparently.
On September 27 2009 10:17 MYM.Testie wrote: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU TOLD A FAKE STORY JUST TO SAY YOU GOT TO C- ON ICCUP ANOTHER FUCKING C- ICCUP BLOG D:
I'm so emotionally crushed now T_T
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