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i never thought that i would ask any community on an internet forum for an opinion which involves me and my dilemma. but it happened (or actually is happenening now) so somewhat help me out people. off to the problem.
Poll: should i stay or should i go now? (Vote): go? (Vote): stay?
so there is a girl that i, lets say "love" although this word is more than inadequate but there is no other which could be used instead.she's right now on vacation about 650km away from me but she's there only for about 2 weeks.in couple of hours my parents are leaving me WITH THEIR CAR and heading to croatia for vacation. on monday and tuesday i don't have to work and on wendesday my work starts about 19:00 CET. i am thinking about going to her to spend some time (~30h) with her and get back. the cost of this voyage would be sth about 150 euro (which is a big sum of money - at least for me and at this moment).
so im having a hard time deciding what to do and here is when you guys come into play. give your opinion on this please.
and as for why am i doing it: there are some bright stars here and i think that i might have not taken something into my calculations and i hope that You'll give me some more insight.monday morning (6-7 CET is t0 to decide)
if you'll help me out ill give you an update of what has been decided and its outcome.
additional info:
-there is also a 99.99999999% chance of me getting laid but plz dont use it as an argument and it wont change anything -the car isn't in bad technical shape but there have been some problems recently and i dont know if it won't break in the middle of the trip (and i cant afford that - not that much money on the account) -my parents cant know about anuthing (so until the car wont break everything is fine)
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well ya...but two things - imagine the look at her face when i would arrive - no risk no fun...
i just dont want to regret my decision.
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United States22883 Posts
Don't go, but plan something special for when she gets back.
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he goes there and finds her hooked up with another guy your car gets stolen you interrupt her plans and she gets fairly mad :O
but in all seriousness just stay , lol i mean some time apart is good ~ a couple calls here and there would suffice, a letter if you really want to (girls love letters) and just do something special to say "omg i missed you" when she gets back
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don't go wait 2 damn weeks
not worth it, esp about the $300 you'd be dropping, might turn out worse then you expect etc
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you you should just wait, it would be rude to just stop by. she might be with another man :O
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That's a lot of money. Doesn't look like you car can handle 1300 km from "the small problems".
Besides, your parents can just check how many miles you drove. I'm pretty sure 1300 km is a fairly large sum.
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Don't be a clingy jughead. Stay home and enjoy your video games.
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Stay home and jack off over her picture,then when she gets back tell her how much fun you had doing so!
But really don't go thats like "WTF????????"
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well the option with an another man - not gonna happen.for sure.(almost ^^)
the letter sound nice - but it wouldn't be enough (for me that is)
car stolen and the money - ya i know... ;/
and the problem is that after she comes back we just might have not enough time for each other.
i wouldn't be considered as stopping by...so no offending her here lol.
checking the miles possible but not convincing
and if you say to prepare sth special - what would you do?or think of?
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Vote for stay, just use your logics man. Compare the netgain and risks of both option.
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On July 20 2008 11:49 arb wrote: Stay home and jack off over her picture,then when she gets back tell her how much fun you had doing so!
But really don't go thats like "WTF????????" you sir are a dumbass..or have no life.
edit:who said "go" and why?
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imo it's kinda weird to just "drop by" 1300 km away without telling her anything...
you two are together or what? talk to her... call her frist.
and the problem is that after she comes back we just might have not enough time for each other.
aha, so the one day you spend with here there is "much"? I bet you'll have more than a day to spend together when she gets back... anyway, who is she on vacation with?
basically, I'd say don't go.
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I say stay. I wouldn't take the risk. The guys/girls are right, a couple calls, saying I missed u should suffice.
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On July 20 2008 12:06 quirinus wrote:imo it's kinda weird to just "drop by" 1300 km away without telling her anything... you two are together or what? talk to her... call her frist. Show nested quote +and the problem is that after she comes back we just might have not enough time for each other. aha, so the one day you spend with here there is "much"? I bet you'll have more than a day to spend together when she gets back... anyway, who is she on vacation with? basically, I'd say don't go.
as far as i know her (and i know her quite good) she would really happy about it so thats not a problem. yes, we are together.calling her/talking about with her is optional but i know her answer already.
basicly yes, sure we will have more time but with things like that it'll never be enough - you know what i mean.
shes with her sister and the sisters husband, the mother couldn't come due to some family issues.
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yeah I know. xD
ah, well I don't know the details so it's kinda hard to help you well. I'd have some more detailed questiones, but there's no point asking.
soooo... reason vs emotions? head vs heart? which one will prevail? choose!
well imo, money <<<< time (with gf and people, new experiences, adventures, etc) so don't worry on that part. trust me on the $$$ issue, I had a lot of insight on that one. the money (&car) dosen't matter compared to that, it's a little bump on the road that many people take too seriously or don't understand how to handle it, but that's another topic.
so it comes down to your and her feelings/reactions, and everyones else reaction (the other people posts pretty much sum up a part of the reactions). if you're so sure her sister and her husband wouldn't mind, and that she'd be very happy (and you ofc), then go for it.
btw, where in croatia did they go? :D (i'm from croatia)
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you're not going to regret this if you don't go. you put forth a pretty logical judgement if you stay , imo but just do what you want to do .. <_< i don't think following a website (arguably knows barely anything on this.. topic , no offense <<; ) is a wise decision, plus we don't even know the entire circumstance
make sure u think it out though ... <.<
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On July 20 2008 13:00 quirinus wrote: yeah I know. xD
ah, well I don't know the details so it's kinda hard to help you well. I'd have some more detailed questiones, but there's no point asking.
soooo... reason vs emotions? head vs heart? which one will prevail? choose!
well imo, money <<<< time (with gf and people, new experiences, adventures, etc) so don't worry on that part. trust me on the $$$ issue, I had a lot of insight on that one. the money (&car) dosen't matter compared to that, it's a little bump on the road that many people take too seriously or don't understand how to handle it, but that's another topic.
so it comes down to your and her feelings/reactions, and everyones else reaction (the other people posts pretty much sum up a part of the reactions). if you're so sure her sister and her husband wouldn't mind, and that she'd be very happy (and you ofc), then go for it.
btw, where in croatia did they go? :D (i'm from croatia) yeah it comes down to the head vs heart battle and i wanted to know if i thought about everything.
sure that the money aren't really an issue but still that's a pretty nice amount and it could be used for some other purpouse as rewarding as the trip itself so it was more that kind of a dilemma. ^^
im still worried about the car but we will see. if i decide to go i'll prolly write about that (just found out that tl blogs are fun lol).
im not quite sure what's the name of the place they're heading to but its the dalmatia region close to sibenik - zadar - pakostane and stuff.
if you really want any answers just ask the questions.i'll try to answer all of them.
thx for your response.cheers :d
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On July 20 2008 13:10 HeavOnEarth wrote: you're not going to regret this if you don't go. you put forth a pretty logical judgement if you stay , imo but just do what you want to do .. <_< i don't think following a website (arguably knows barely anything on this.. topic , no offense <<; ) is a wise decision, plus we don't even know the entire circumstance
make sure u think it out though ... <.< well the point of this blog was to check out if i though about everything, not to let it decide for me.
what would you want to know?or what else do you think i should take under consideration?
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Canada7170 Posts
If you go there will be trouble. If you stay, there will be double.
+ Show Spoiler +Not actually advice if you didn't catch it, it's from a song
EDIT: Stay, btw. For reasons everyone else said. Is there no other way for you to get there? Seems like the issue is more about your parents than money is. I could be wrong though. If your only viable means of getting there is your car, don't go. If you're willing to spend money on getting there some other way, ...go for it.
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On July 20 2008 13:15 drug_vict1m wrote:Show nested quote +On July 20 2008 13:00 quirinus wrote: yeah I know. xD
ah, well I don't know the details so it's kinda hard to help you well. I'd have some more detailed questiones, but there's no point asking.
soooo... reason vs emotions? head vs heart? which one will prevail? choose!
well imo, money <<<< time (with gf and people, new experiences, adventures, etc) so don't worry on that part. trust me on the $$$ issue, I had a lot of insight on that one. the money (&car) dosen't matter compared to that, it's a little bump on the road that many people take too seriously or don't understand how to handle it, but that's another topic.
so it comes down to your and her feelings/reactions, and everyones else reaction (the other people posts pretty much sum up a part of the reactions). if you're so sure her sister and her husband wouldn't mind, and that she'd be very happy (and you ofc), then go for it.
btw, where in croatia did they go? :D (i'm from croatia) yeah it comes down to the head vs heart battle and i wanted to know if i thought about everything. sure that the money aren't really an issue but still that's a pretty nice amount and it could be used for some other purpouse as rewarding as the trip itself so it was more that kind of a dilemma. ^^ im still worried about the car but we will see. if i decide to go i'll prolly write about that (just found out that tl blogs are fun lol). im not quite sure what's the name of the place they're heading to but its the dalmatia region close to sibenik - zadar - pakostane and stuff. if you really want any answers just ask the questions.i'll try to answer all of them. thx for your response.cheers :d
ahh zadar, its nice there, though I'm from the north west coast.
can't think of any more pro's or con's atm...
well, if you decide to go, get good info on the trip before and don't rush while driving - 1 hour less from the time with her becouse of responsible (slow) driving <<< your life. might buy her something (teddybear? XD) and maybe her sister/husband for barging in anannounced. (they're all staying together?)
if you don't go, you can always call her, girls like to talk a lot (ah the phone bills xD) and she'll feel nice that you think about her. and as someone else mentioned, you can do something nice when she comes back, but that's another topic. or send her a letter with a funny pic of yours and some nice stuff written on it in the tone that you miss her or something. might be a bit too cheesy. dunno, I'm not thinking straight, I'm too sleepy now, got to go to bed.
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ugh , if it wasn't painfully obvious already , OP obviously is going to go ; he's just using us by fabricating a fallacy that appears to be logical
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On July 20 2008 13:36 mikeymoo wrote:If you go there will be trouble. If you stay, there will be double. + Show Spoiler +Not actually advice if you didn't catch it, it's from a song EDIT: Stay, btw. For reasons everyone else said. Is there no other way for you to get there? Seems like the issue is more about your parents than money is. I could be wrong though. If your only viable means of getting there is your car, don't go. If you're willing to spend money on getting there some other way, ...go for it. ya i got that.
i was looking for a train connection but it's uselss...the trip would've take me sth about 13-18h depending on which train i would pick.
On July 20 2008 13:37 quirinus wrote:Show nested quote +On July 20 2008 13:15 drug_vict1m wrote:On July 20 2008 13:00 quirinus wrote: yeah I know. xD
ah, well I don't know the details so it's kinda hard to help you well. I'd have some more detailed questiones, but there's no point asking.
soooo... reason vs emotions? head vs heart? which one will prevail? choose!
well imo, money <<<< time (with gf and people, new experiences, adventures, etc) so don't worry on that part. trust me on the $$$ issue, I had a lot of insight on that one. the money (&car) dosen't matter compared to that, it's a little bump on the road that many people take too seriously or don't understand how to handle it, but that's another topic.
so it comes down to your and her feelings/reactions, and everyones else reaction (the other people posts pretty much sum up a part of the reactions). if you're so sure her sister and her husband wouldn't mind, and that she'd be very happy (and you ofc), then go for it.
btw, where in croatia did they go? :D (i'm from croatia) yeah it comes down to the head vs heart battle and i wanted to know if i thought about everything. sure that the money aren't really an issue but still that's a pretty nice amount and it could be used for some other purpouse as rewarding as the trip itself so it was more that kind of a dilemma. ^^ im still worried about the car but we will see. if i decide to go i'll prolly write about that (just found out that tl blogs are fun lol). im not quite sure what's the name of the place they're heading to but its the dalmatia region close to sibenik - zadar - pakostane and stuff. if you really want any answers just ask the questions.i'll try to answer all of them. thx for your response.cheers :d ahh zadar, its nice there, though I'm from the north west coast. can't think of any more pro's or con's atm... well, if you decide to go, get good info on the trip before and don't rush while driving - 1 hour less from the time with her becouse of responsible (slow) driving <<< your life. might buy her something (teddybear? XD) and maybe her sister/husband for barging in anannounced. (they're all staying together?) if you don't go, you can always call her, girls like to talk a lot (ah the phone bills xD) and she'll feel nice that you think about her. and as someone else mentioned, you can do something nice when she comes back, but that's another topic. or send her a letter with a funny pic of yours and some nice stuff written on it in the tone that you miss her or something. might be a bit too cheesy. dunno, I'm not thinking straight, I'm too sleepy now, got to go to bed.
i was in porec few times and i liked it there.far more than the south ^^
i know about that..im fucked up maybe but not completly out of reality so no problem, thx for reminding anyway. :p
I'll still think about that.we will see.goodnight, and thx for ideas.
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On July 20 2008 13:50 HeavOnEarth wrote:ugh , if it wasn't painfully obvious already , OP obviously is going to go ; he's just using us by fabricating a fallacy that appears to be logical there is sth in your train of thought, although it's not exactly like that. im still not sure what to do and i hope that you guys will help me decide (well your opinions actually)
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Go
Dont be boing. Do something crazy. You might look back and say, fuck that was dumb, or you might look back and be say, that was a great idea. Either way its an experience and a hell of a lot better than staying at home playing starcraft.
I would let her know however before just rocking up after 650kms.
Btw, who actually knows what their odometer is at down to that accuracy? I know mine is at somewhere between 100,000 and 110,000. If someone drove 1300kms in my car, I probs wouldnt realise.
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Hm. After thinking about this for a while, I'd say stay. My reasoning is that the potential problems it could cause outweigh the gains. It may be stressful for your girlfriend because she may already have particular plans for that day, and she may worry about you driving back all that distance.
I would save that money and do something nice for her when she gets back, like take her to a ballet or something.
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Lol relax dear Romeo. Your hot love can wait 2 weeks, it makes it strong or crumbles should it be weak.
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This is one of those things t hat you do if you think you owe your gf something. just love her when you get back
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I think you will arrive there and find her in bed with another man. So dont go!
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so love is inadequate to describe how you feel about her? why are you even considering of staying? if you love someone then you will do anything to be with them. seems like you arent in love, especially if you are so rational about this decision.
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only gone 2 weeks man. just wait it out
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imagine the look at her face when i would arrive She's there, she has her own plan. If you come, she'll: - have to give up her own plan to spend time with you - feel that you dig into her privacy - feel more important and raise her expectation toward you
This is how girl's mind works: if you stay, she'd wish that you were there. If you come, she'd wish that you weren't there. Pick one.
no risk, no fun She doesn't take any risk and she won't find it fun. If you drag her into risky situation, it will just get worse. It's only fun if BOTH of you agree on taking risk and I doubt that she'd known it in advance.
Surprise can turn right or wrong. In this case it's wrong.
Bottom line: It's not worth it.
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thanks guys for your posts. i've been thinking about this through the past 20 hours or so and still nothing.no decision. but i did talk to her and mentioned about this idea (suprise plan - failed) and she said that it would be wonderful if i managed to pull it of but she wouldn't die because of hanker if i didn't (so pretty much what i expected).
i liked the thoughts of: itzme_petey - maybe your right, and it's just my whining because i find it nice but i just don't wanna (not ready for such risk yada yada...) you get the point.but the idea still is cunning and i would like to do sth for her.not expecting anything from her.
Elvin_vn -
This is how girl's mind works: if you stay, she'd wish that you were there. If you come, she'd wish that you weren't there. Pick one. this line...it owns me quite hard.and i would have to agree, but i just cant..prolly the same reason as with petey.
as for: evan: but it doesn't have to.
hypnosis:i dont feel like i own her sth.and i dont want her to feel like that also.this situation may cause such a reaction, but if i explained it to her it'd be ok.
fight_or_flight pretty much understands my point of view the best.but tell me, wouldn't do it?are you 100% sure?
so guys keep'em commin...i'm havin a really hard time with this one.. ;/
cheerz
edit:dunno why but i get the feeling it starts to look like 4chan
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I don't think I can help you, I'm pretty indecisive myself.
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*slaps drug_vict1m around a bit with a large trout*
STAY BOY~ ]:
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On July 20 2008 18:47 fight_or_flight wrote: I don't think I can help you, I'm pretty indecisive myself. i could've expected this one ^^
On July 21 2008 01:47 HeavOnEarth wrote: *slaps drug_vict1m around a bit with a large trout*
STAY BOY~ ]: still don't know how will this work out.some new problems occured but solving them is within my range.and im going to a car mechanic tomorrow and this prolly will be the main factor in this decision.
thank you all guys
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Where is the "Stay and bang her best friend option"?
Seriously what would Chuck Norris do?
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Just go. It isn't really that much money, you have nothing better to do with your time (other than agonize over it)... and the risk of your car / parents finding out isn't really that bad, I think (even if they do, it probably won't be as big of a deal as it seems).
You want to be there, she wants you there, and there's no real reason to stay. You'll regret it if you don't.
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On July 21 2008 05:18 Polemarch wrote: Just go. It isn't really that much money, you have nothing better to do with your time (other than agonize over it)... and the risk of your car / parents finding out isn't really that bad, I think (even if they do, it probably won't be as big of a deal as it seems).
You want to be there, she wants you there, and there's no real reason to stay. You'll regret it if you don't. i hate you...
thx
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if anyone is still waiting for the outcome.
thanks to the mechanic and cars general technical fuck up im not going.hope you're all glad
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Keep it in your pants; stay at home.
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On July 22 2008 04:46 Salv wrote: Keep it in your pants; stay at home. you just dont understand dont you?
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Well, as someone already said in this topic in some other words: If you don't run after women, they will run after you - more or less. xD
Well, think of it like this, you told her that you might come there, but you didn't, that'll make her think a lot more about you etc, so you'll have a better time once she comes back becouse she'll miss you more.
So, have fun when she comes back.
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On July 22 2008 20:30 quirinus wrote:Well, as someone already said in this topic in some other words: If you don't run after women, they will run after you - more or less. xD Well, think of it like this, you told her that you might come there, but you didn't, that'll make her think a lot more about you etc, so you'll have a better time once she comes back becouse she'll miss you more. So, have fun when she comes back. i wouldn't consider that as running after her - it's not like i have to fight for her or show her that i care/feel/etc. just wanted to do sth suprising and it would benefit both sides so... ^^
yeah, prolly i will, not that witout it i wouldnt have, but still.
now im left with counting days to when she comes back..
oh da horror, da horror
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i said go
i say call her on the phone, talk to her a bit, and just joke around about it. like "hey, watcha doing? wat would you do if i surprised you there?" then she says something, and like a day or two later you show up. you guys would probably have a good time together, make some memories, etc.
i kno there are some things that you would be worried about, but when u r with her, you wont be worrying then :D
i had a gf that i loved, and loved spending time with her. seriously, dont waste the time you have with her, cuz u never kno wat might happen in the future.
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Don't go. Wait for her to come back.
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if you dont tell her ahead of time, how do u kno she will even be there? maybe she goes out for the day, to a movie, or somthing?
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