Imagine if people suddenly had no legs anymore. We would be practically nailed to the ground. We couldn't go to the pub and we couldn't meet new people. If we couldn't meet new people, we couldn't fall in love. If we couldn't fall in love, there would be no babies. No babies equals no human race anymore, and no human race means no pastry chefs, and that means no chocolate cakes. And I absolutely adore chocolate cakes!
Leaving the silly notion of our legs simply vanishing aside, they are one of many means of transportation, which is a major motive of our modern world. We provide it in various ways, not only by walking. Our legs will most probably stay with us for quite some time – but they did get some competition. First came the horses and carriages, providing people with a swift means of transportation across the country. Next were the trains, allowing transportation for masses at the expense of privacy and the freedom of taking one's own path. The 20th century saw the arrival of motorised vehicles: cars, motorcycles, scooters, buses and so on; they provided us with independence and incomparable speed of travel. The question is, do our trusty legs have any advantages over the seemingly superior motorised vehicles?
The advancement of automotive technology in the past decades was astonishing. A simple set of four wheels, a couple of iron bars and a simple contraption evolved into one of the most popular and trendsetting devices on Earth, scoring especially with its unparalleled ease, speed and comfort of travelling. Cars even became objects of desire, status symbols – far more than what they were originally designed as.
What could our pedes possibly have to offer to compete with something like a Ferrari? First off, they are fully under our control. I cannot think of any news about a pedestrian suddenly losing control over his feet and crashing into a display window, leaving one dead, several injured and.the store owner in tears. Furthermore, walking is cheap. We are born with legs free of charge, we don't have to refuel every few hundred kilometres, there is no insurance cost, and a small bump will quickly repair itself. In addition, walking is extremely healthy and helps prevent the diseases – for example thrombosis – that may ultimately render our legs useless.
They both come with drawbacks, though. The car is at times horribly expensive and prone to defects, while Mr. Murphy makes sure that the parking lot is full at the most inappropriate times. We don't have to park our feet, so this means one point for them. However, on certain occasions we have to arrive at our destination as quickly as possible, and this is where cars clearly beat walking. I am somewhat of an environmentalist, so I award my legs an additional point for not fuming up our atmosphere with dangerous gases. They don't require roads, either.
I have to admit that I might be a little biased towards cars, since I don't yet have a drivers license, but walking clearly takes this win home, scoring especially with the low upkeep cost and the health benefit. When clean cars will roll on our streets – and when I will finally have a license – I will consider giving them a chance. Until then, though, I will make best use of my legs, and at times granting them some rest by taking the bus. That way I can at least sit back, look out of the window and enjoy my piece of chocolate cake.
OMG... I can't stop laughing. The seriozity of this adds to it's comical appeal no offence, real nice^^ =)) It is really impossible to decide, and there is only a middle way - WALKING combined with CARS. At least for the century in which we live. EoS;)
Oh but you do have to refuel your legs. Its called eating. We do have to pay medical insurance and drunk people lose control of their legs all the time and fall and break things or hurt people. You know what the drawback of walking is? It takes forever. I'm not gonna get up at 5 in the morning to get ready and then sweat it out walking all the way to work, when I can get up at 7 and drive there. By the time I would get to work I would be dead tired and not want to work, not to mention after the slave hours I put in I have to walk back home.
Did you actually submit this for university credit? What course would it be on? What is the topic of this essay? Is this even an essay? It seems more like a story than an essay.
On January 25 2007 11:54 alpskomleko wrote: Imagine if people suddenly had no legs anymore. We would be practically nailed to the ground.
I stopped reading after that. There are people in this world that do not have legs. ROFL TOO BAD THEY CAN'T POST TO DEFEND THEMSELVES BECAUSE THEY'RE NAILED TO THE GROUND.
......
No, no, I've seen people without legs move. They use their ass as a sled and pull themselves along using their hands. At least that's them in China when they can't afford wheel chairs LOL
As an argument or a paper, its poor. So you use your choclate cake to open and close, but even how you worked that was weak. And then youre comparing the practical uses of our legs to machines. Your supports:
Legs: No extra costs, because yknow, people are born with them. Car: Can hurt people. Much more than just kicking them would. Car: Costs money, parking can be a hassle. Car: Gets you somewhere fast. Legs: They do not pollute, nor do they need roads.
All appealing to logic, but theyre barely held together at all. Youre permanently expelled!
Sure you're useless, but even you should have noticed the underlying sarcasm in this "essay". It's no more than comparative essay structuring practice, and the cake thing is in there because I woke up with "oh what the heck, let's use cakez in an essay bout cars and feetz" in my head. It was never meant as a definite essay on the topic, and don't value it as one.
@chinese guy: It's part of a portfolio, yes. The portfolio includes other gems, such as "2 introductory paragraphs on Christmas shopping" and "Recipe essay". If you fancy corn mush with sour cabbage, I would be delighted to post it.
On January 25 2007 17:51 alpskomleko wrote: Sure you're useless, but even you should have noticed the underlying sarcasm in this "essay". It's no more than comparative essay structuring practice, and the cake thing is in there because I woke up with "oh what the heck, let's use cakez in an essay bout cars and feetz" in my head. It was never meant as a definite essay on the topic, and don't value it as one.
Oh, I guess Ive mistaken your blatant sarcasm for poor writing. + Show Spoiler +
Imagine if people suddenly had no legs anymore. We would be practically nailed to the ground. We couldn't go to the pub and we couldn't meet new people. If we couldn't meet new people, we couldn't fall in love. If we couldn't fall in love, there would be no babies. No babies equals no human race anymore, and no human race means no pastry chefs, and that means no chocolate cakes. And I absolutely adore chocolate cakes!
You could still play StarCraft, so it wouldn't be a detrimental liability.
Too bad people will never stop driving cars, too convenient. Also, the tone of the essay dosent even sound very serious...I really don't think this is of college calibur, like most people have said, its like for grade-school.
Oh, and I love how you mentioned that you don't have a drivers license yet, so how can you make a comparison between walking and driving but ok :p
On January 25 2007 17:51 alpskomleko wrote: It's no more than comparative essay structuring practice. (...) It was never meant as a definite essay on the topic, and don't value it as one.
Hmmm, what topics do you choose from? This seems like a man vs. machine argument, so if you can, you should argue about Boxer vs. Perfect AI that can micro/macro perfectly
On January 25 2007 11:54 alpskomleko wrote: Imagine if people suddenly had no legs anymore. We would be practically nailed to the ground.
I stopped reading after that. There are people in this world that do not have legs. ROFL TOO BAD THEY CAN'T POST TO DEFEND THEMSELVES BECAUSE THEY'RE NAILED TO THE GROUND.
......
No, no, I've seen people without legs move. They use their ass as a sled and pull themselves along using their hands. At least that's them in China when they can't afford wheel chairs LOL
Am i evil for laughing at this? For some reason this thread has me in giggles. "Shitty essay, quit university and join manule labor" had me cracking up.
It's interesting how many people have nukes as an icon if you look at these old threads though. If i were to take a rough statistic guess, i would say that about a third of the people from ten years ago left the forum by getting banned.
Though i guess we have a lot of bias due to the fact that the threads which reappear are probably the more "interesting" ones (weird threads which contain more shitposts than usual)
I would actually be interested in real stats about this. What percentage of the ten-year old accounts is not banned? What if we are only talking about accounts with 100+ posts to weed out spambots?
I laughed at some of the things written in the OP, but cringed at how awful the writing is. Is it supposed to be satire or something, perhaps on how mundane or absurd comparative essay topics could be? If so, well done.