Well, this may not be very welcome here but i really need to talk about it, and get some kind of feedback of people who can understand me (or at least try)...
Let me begin with a question: When does gaming become an addiction? I may look like a retorical question but it's not, i would really like to know the answer because... i feel like i may in fact be an addict, ive been playing video games all my life but as a hobby, i played mario, zelda, and almost every game you could mention, i did play it and beat it, the problem arised when i started to watch/play SC2 -Yes i said problem-, it was (is) so good, so competitive, so complicated so fun that it catch me badly, i watch almost every free tournament there is (i cant affor to pay any money to watch it, but if i could i would), my dad bough me a high end pc at the begining of 2011 and since then ive been playing SC2, i started bronze silver gold plat and now diamond, i though i was working hard on it (like athletes do for their sports), didnt see a problem on it, but now looking back i can see my mistake, im 25 years old and my parents pay for EVERYTHING i do, college, food, drinks, shelter etc... Im almost a mechanical engineer (1 year left, but im very very delayed), but you want to know why im not engineer already?... Yes you guessed right, playing!, and its not just playing, its studying builds, readings about strategy, watching tournaments, day9tv in fact the least thing i do is play sc2 (ladder anxiety is too strong)... And i feel my life is passing by and i do nothing to catch it, at my age i should have a girlfriend, more friends and even most important of all i should be able to earn my own money, it feels bad bad to have to ask my dad "hey dad, can i have money, i want to go to the movies, or have a night out"... And know i think, "yes i just have to get my Engineer degree so i can be able to earn money to buy a better pc, move from this shitty country (venezuela) and start to be a pro gamer" but may be its not like that, maybe i just have to... internalize im just not good enuf, even if i live in a pro house team, or i move to korea... i may fail, and then what? be poor the rest of my life? No i dont want that, and being poor (poberty is extreme here) will be almost for sure my future if i dont do something useful with my life... But then i watch day9 (who i really respect a lot) and he says: "Do something you love and you will be succesful", and i love SC2, i love to be competitive, i love gaming, and i in fact love eSports... And i just dont know what to do... After writing all these shit you may or may not have read, i feel lot better but i dont see a clear answer yet, i just know i would love to be a pro gamer, live in a pro house, play in tournaments, travel and be on the top of the world and maybe... just maybe in the future feel proud of myself because i holded to what i really love, eSports, or maybe not and ill end up being poor and with no talent at all to earn my sustain... It's hard
Well this shit is too long, thanks just for reading and excuse me for my horrible english
Passions become addictions when you neglect other aspects of your life to continue doing your hobby/activity/whatever. If your life is becoming unmanageable as a result of what you're doing, then you might just be addicted. Try other things; usually if you are addicted to something, other hobbies and interests will fall out the window to make room for your obsession.
Denial is strong with addiction. No one wants to admit they have a problem, so people will go to extremes to try to make it work when all they get is the same results. It's like a love affair with destruction. Really try to analyze your thoughts...how often you think about sc, how much of a priority it is for you (your priorities should be school right now), what you would do without out it. You can honestly address the problem now or wait until it gets really bad. Addiction isn't specific to games either. It's a coping mechanism to look for things outside of yourself to give yourself validation and comfort.
I don't want to scare you, but it's very important to know if you are actually addicted, and at this point in your life (without significant problems resulting from sc) only you can tell yourself if you have a problem.
And i feel my life is passing by and i do nothing to catch it, at my age i should have a girlfriend, more friends and even most important of all i should be able to earn my own money
Don't hold yourself to standards. There is no 'should have a girlfriend or more friends'. Some people go through their entire lives without significant relationships with the opposite sex and some people are of the introverted kind or might just not be interested in having many friends. Social acceptability does not equal success.
However, on the other hand, it is important that you do one day become self-sustaining and independent. You're going to school right now so your parents will be inclined to support you. It's okay to take your time, but do not neglect your responsiblites which it seems you are aware of. We all miss those times where we were blind to the pile of shit we were in. You have to smell the shit now (sorry that was a terrible analogy lol)
And i just dont know what to do... After writing all these shit you may or may not have read, i feel lot better but i dont see a clear answer yet, i just know i would love to be a pro gamer, live in a pro house, play in tournaments, travel and be on the top of the world and maybe... just maybe in the future feel proud of myself because i holded to what i really love, eSports, or maybe not and ill end up being poor and with no talent at all to earn my sustain... It's hard
“Life is a journey, not a destination.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson
Try your best to do your best in every single moment. Live in the present and not the wreckage (in your own mind) of the future. We all have our aspirations and values but we don't always live up to them. Take action and have a positive attitude, It makes all the difference.
At some point you have to realize, that you can't be 30, dependant on your parents, and playing video games all day I think you are slowly coming to the realization that you have to grow up. And the things that you want when you are done with school cannot be acquired through your current life style.
So you have to make a choice. Are you going to grow up and be a person that has real career goals, lives an adult life, faces real world problems, deals with finances, jobs, women, and the like? Or do you want to never grow up like peter pan and fly around in a magical land?
I hope you choose the former. But at the same time understand that this doesn't mean you have to give up playing games for the rest of your life. You can still find maybe an hour or two a week for your hobby. It is hard to face. That will be all the time I get? Yes, think of all the work your parents have to do to take care of themselves and you. There is of course their career, but there is also, cleaning and maintaining a house, grocery shopping, yard work, cooking, dry cleaning, pets, children, paying bills, planning for the future etc. etc.
While you are in school, you truely have but one responsibility. That is to do your school work. The people around you take care of most other things. This is why you have so much time for games.
You don't have to stop anything if you are paying for it.
If you are paying for your own life, you can do whatever you want within the boundaries of the law.
If you are holding up your hand and letting your parents pay for you, you have at least a minimal obligation to living up to their demands and expectations.
If you are willing to pay for your own housing/food/etc, feel free to do whatever. If you are living off your parents dime, I don't think it is too much effort to at least put a little bit into progressing towards independence.
Having a passion for Starcraft, or gaming in general, does not exclude you doing well in "real life", you just have to realise and accept your own limitations.
However, personally I feel like getting a high paying job and all that is way overrated. Do what you love and follow your realistic dreams. Lets look at the facts: You are 25, and you're in diamond league. There is, no way you will ever become a pro Starcraft 2 player. But if you in fact have a huge passion for gaming, maybe another role is more suited for you? Something that maybe will demand less of your time, but still keep you "in the game".
Do what you truly think is right, but don't spend your time chasing unrealistic dreams.
On August 15 2012 22:42 TheKwas wrote: Just go pro.
No. This is the worst advice.
I am sorry but I am going to have to give you a wake up call.
You think you can go pro? How many tornaments have you won? How many viewers does your stream have? How high are you in grandmasters? How many pros do you know?
Think of all the thousands and thousands of other people who watch Day 9, study builds, practice like you do. Don't you think, that there are a lot of other people in a way better position to go pro than you? In terms of talent, in terms of fan base, in terms of connections to people they know who are already pro? In terms of sponsership. And you, at 25 think that you can get to that point? Not a lot of people going pro in this scene that are 20+...
Look, when I was a kid I wanted to be an astronaut. But by the time I was in ready to go to college I just wasn't in the position. By then, I didn't have a pilots license, I didn't have the grades to get into a top aeronautical program, I didn't have connections to people in NASA.
It was a childish dream not connected to the real fucking world.
However I was in the position to get into a good school for mathematics. And I took advantage of that. I have a good job, and a stable career.
You have the opportunity to make real fucking money with your degree. You have to want it. You have to go out and get it. You have to start focusing on the work you need to do to get a good entry level job, and make a real good impression in the first couple years. Then work on completing projects that impress your bosses. Then work on being a top employee. Then you are in a position for a better salary. A better life.
Rinse, and repeat.
That is what you need to do. You think pro gammers make great money? Honestly? The best in the world make maybe 100k a year. Remember that is the fucking best in the world.
You could have that within in 5 years if you focused on you degree, and you job. And you know what? You could have the potential to make more for the rest of your life. Not the short lived gaming career of 10 years or so tops.
I agree with other posters, you're not addicted to gaming or anything else per se, but it sounds like you *are* addicted to being babied. Time to grow up.
On August 15 2012 23:13 zalz wrote: It wasn't the OP that said he wanted to go pro.
And a 100k within 5 years of a degree seems just a tad bit optimistic.
Other than that, I agree with what you said.
Very optomistic. But it can be done. I never said he wouldn't have to work hard for it.
Of course there are people that start at over 100k. My ex brother inlaw was top of his class at columbia law. His starting salary was crazy. That does not apply here though.
Specific to the OP, Engineers, Computer scientists, Analysts, can do this in the right markets, NYC, San Fran, Chicago, Boston. But they have to earn it. Not easy. But I know it can be done.
Get an impressive list of accomplishments from your entry level job. Market yourself appropriately. Now you have 5 years of experience, and an great resume. Is 100k still a pipe dream? Maybe in Bumfuck Kentucky. But not in the right market.
On August 15 2012 22:42 TheKwas wrote: Just go pro.
That is what you need to do. You think pro gammers make great money? Honestly? The best in the world make maybe 100k a year. Remember that is the fucking best in the world.
Sorry to nitpick, but flash was making ~350k in 2010 and 2011.
On August 15 2012 22:42 TheKwas wrote: Just go pro.
No. This is the worst advice.
I am sorry but I am going to have to give you a wake up call.
You think you can go pro? How many tornaments have you won? How many viewers does your stream have? How high are you in grandmasters? How many pros do you know?
Think of all the thousands and thousands of other people who watch Day 9, study builds, practice like you do. Don't you think, that there are a lot of other people in a way better position to go pro than you? In terms of talent, in terms of fan base, in terms of connections to people they know who are already pro? In terms of sponsership. And you, at 25 think that you can get to that point? Not a lot of people going pro in this scene that are 20+...
Look, when I was a kid I wanted to be an astronaut. But by the time I was in ready to go to college I just wasn't in the position. By then, I didn't have a pilots license, I didn't have the grades to get into a top aeronautical program, I didn't have connections to people in NASA.
It was a childish dream not connected to the real fucking world.
However I was in the position to get into a good school for mathematics. And I took advantage of that. I have a good job, and a stable career.
You have the opportunity to make real fucking money with your degree. You have to want it. You have to go out and get it. You have to start focusing on the work you need to do to get a good entry level job, and make a real good impression in the first couple years. Then work on completing projects that impress your bosses. Then work on being a top employee. Then you are in a position for a better salary. A better life.
Rinse, and repeat.
That is what you need to do. You think pro gammers make great money? Honestly? The best in the world make maybe 100k a year. Remember that is the fucking best in the world.
You could have that within in 5 years if you focused on you degree, and you job. And you know what? You could have the potential to make more for the rest of your life. Not the short lived gaming career of 10 years or so tops.
Wake. The. Fuck. Up.
This guy sounds really happy. Follow his advice and you can be too!
Thanks everyone who read it, lot of advices here lol, and the video was hilarious xD but i think his intention was to bother me, and instead it was really funny
And thanks Smancer, love your real talk, cuz keeping it real... 100k/year its not that much, ill just get my degree and drop competitive gaming, ill play just for fun
On August 15 2012 22:42 TheKwas wrote: Just go pro.
No. This is the worst advice.
I am sorry but I am going to have to give you a wake up call.
You think you can go pro? How many tornaments have you won? How many viewers does your stream have? How high are you in grandmasters? How many pros do you know?
Think of all the thousands and thousands of other people who watch Day 9, study builds, practice like you do. Don't you think, that there are a lot of other people in a way better position to go pro than you? In terms of talent, in terms of fan base, in terms of connections to people they know who are already pro? In terms of sponsership. And you, at 25 think that you can get to that point? Not a lot of people going pro in this scene that are 20+...
Look, when I was a kid I wanted to be an astronaut. But by the time I was in ready to go to college I just wasn't in the position. By then, I didn't have a pilots license, I didn't have the grades to get into a top aeronautical program, I didn't have connections to people in NASA.
It was a childish dream not connected to the real fucking world.
However I was in the position to get into a good school for mathematics. And I took advantage of that. I have a good job, and a stable career.
You have the opportunity to make real fucking money with your degree. You have to want it. You have to go out and get it. You have to start focusing on the work you need to do to get a good entry level job, and make a real good impression in the first couple years. Then work on completing projects that impress your bosses. Then work on being a top employee. Then you are in a position for a better salary. A better life.
Rinse, and repeat.
That is what you need to do. You think pro gammers make great money? Honestly? The best in the world make maybe 100k a year. Remember that is the fucking best in the world.
You could have that within in 5 years if you focused on you degree, and you job. And you know what? You could have the potential to make more for the rest of your life. Not the short lived gaming career of 10 years or so tops.
Wake. The. Fuck. Up.
This guy sounds really happy. Follow his advice and you can be too!
Listen cupcake, real life isn't all butterflies and rainbows.
I'm telling him what I think is best, and trying to give him a wakeup call. Doing that is kind of hard to do if you are talking like princess sunshine. It had nothing to do with my life.
But if you are currious. Read my first blog. Then you will know a little something about my life.
Happyness is being able to afford a lake front property and jet skies at 40; it is not living in a shitty appartment with second hand furnature with your main income being welfare because you thought that if you just got into masters league you'd be fucking Huk.