1) I am 30
2)You are absolutely right about everything you said about selling it yes, and I have used these skill sets to try and start my own online businesses, although none of them took off so far yet, I know that can change though.
3) I have been feeling a lot better with this new medication, but I am not sure this is the end all be all / perfect thing to fix my issues
4)I'm starting to believe that potentially my running from women to women looking for 'love' or that attachment has also caused this potentially, I've had several relationships lasting up to 3 years, but none of them really seemed like real 'relationships', except for the last one which I spoke about in one of my previous blogs, the girl I fell in love with, this is kind of when this all started, I keep getting a little better over the last few weeks and then fall back and had to go back to ER, so I am listening to all of your wise words and heed at your advice.
5)I feel one of the biggest issues is my circadian cycle being way off (sleep cycle), for a long time, but I am also not sure of this.
6)last medications I have been taking all have 'anti-depressant' qualities ( Depakote, BuSpar), and then (Propanolol) Beta blockers previously for my cluster headaches ( ridiculously painful headaches that are nicknamed suicide headaches, because of the amount of people that commit suicide due to the high level of physical pain)
7) I understand what you are saying about being several you's inside of yourself, although being just 1 the entire time.
8)I understand the power of positive thinking, I understand that the human / human brain has the power to rewrite it's own DNA / ' rewire' the brain, through positive thinking over long periods of time, there is a beautiful movie called "What the Bleep do we know", I think I need to watch again, and also I highly recommend you to watch it as well.
9)The link you shared is very interesting, I will continue to read over and post more tomorrow, I just got off work though and as I said previously I need to try to focus on getting my sleep cycle back in check.
Again, thank you very much for all of your insight and wisdom, it was VERY helpful to read all of what you wrote, you are actually quite intelligent and should consider becoming a psychologist / motivational speaker or something, if you aren't already.
God bless ya bro, unless you are an atheist, in that case you are just awesome, and if it's some other religion that doesn't use a god or something, then just bless ya in whatever way possible hah... thank you, would like to talk to you more in private sometime, ever use any discords?