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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On November 30 2017 21:40 SCC-Faust wrote: I'm getting a hair cut and new threads today. I also shaved my neckbeard. Still have tons of acne and am unfortunately an ugly spot on mankind's gene pool, but I did push myself up from a 1.5/10 to maybe a 3/10. This is boosting my self confidence. I've noticed that someone with my looks doesn't fair well on dating sites or apps. I swiped right on tinder for a solid 30 and only got guys matching me. Is there an "ugly" dating app? Or should I attend furcons and anime conventions to meet ladies? Buy some tea tree oil, that stuff is magic against acne.
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Ok this sounds like cliché advice but its just true. Fortunately for most guys with average or sub-average looks women that hit their mid to late twenties start maturing to the point where they realise they don't need a fuckboy dramaqueen that only has looks and charm going for him in their lives. Suddenly, they start appreciating different qualities in a man. Confidence, stability, and having a goal in your life you're working towards suddenly become much more appealing. But how will you meet them in the first place you ask. Well my friend, by making an effort. Spam like on Tinder, scrounge OKCupid, talk to girls when doing whatever it is you do and spend like at least an hour or so doing that every damn day. Go on dates as much as reasonably possible. I have mediocre looks and can be a bit of a jerk so I don't exactly have women lining up for me if I don't make an effort. At some point though (out of boredom, as an experiment, and probably due to some subconcious low self esteem) I wondered how well I could do if I really made an effort like I mentioned. The result was going on dates 1 to 3 times a week and over the course of several months I met some really amazing and lovely women. Occasionally I surprised myself with girls I considered being way out of my league actually being into me. People will say you'll only find hook ups this way but in my experience if you're open to something more serious you will find that others are as well.
Conclusion: try to be the best version of you you can be and make an effort and you'll surprise yourself. If you want more specific tips on stuff like tinder I'm happy to help.
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On November 30 2017 22:14 Shiragaku wrote: Buy some tea tree oil, that stuff is magic against acne.
I have heard this before, and gave it a small attempt. I think I should commit myself to trying it again for a longer period of time. I think my blemish problem is very odd in nature as I've had it for over 10 years now and I know which foods aggravate it (and it is not foods you'd think). I am not kidding at all, but nuts, fish, coffee and oils make me break out. Chocolate and soda? Nope. Also as weird as this sounds, if I eat oranges, I'll wake up with a ton of white heads the next day. I've documented this over many years, so yeah. I know this is straying from the topic, but it is just so weird to me that this happens and I can't find anyone with similar experiences and my dermatologist basically said "there isn't really enough evidence to link diet and acne" and just piles me on new topicals to try.
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On November 30 2017 21:40 SCC-Faust wrote: I'm getting a hair cut and new threads today. I also shaved my neckbeard. Still have tons of acne and am unfortunately an ugly spot on mankind's gene pool, but I did push myself up from a 1.5/10 to maybe a 3/10. This is boosting my self confidence. I've noticed that someone with my looks doesn't fair well on dating sites or apps. I swiped right on tinder for a solid 30 and only got guys matching me. Is there an "ugly" dating app? Or should I attend furcons and anime conventions to meet ladies?
Do an activity where you can meet girls but demonstrate your fitness... Eg if you're good at skiing organize a ski trip, if you're good at singing do a karaoke night...
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On December 02 2017 08:08 Shady Sands wrote:Show nested quote +On November 30 2017 21:40 SCC-Faust wrote: I'm getting a hair cut and new threads today. I also shaved my neckbeard. Still have tons of acne and am unfortunately an ugly spot on mankind's gene pool, but I did push myself up from a 1.5/10 to maybe a 3/10. This is boosting my self confidence. I've noticed that someone with my looks doesn't fair well on dating sites or apps. I swiped right on tinder for a solid 30 and only got guys matching me. Is there an "ugly" dating app? Or should I attend furcons and anime conventions to meet ladies? Do an activity where you can meet girls but demonstrate your fitness... Eg if you're good at skiing organize a ski trip, if you're good at singing do a karaoke night... ... If you're good at starcraft organise a lan party
...right?
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I don't understand why everyone here has such a dislike for bars. Casual social setting + a drink that helps people relax = easy way to meet people. Why does everyone insist so strongly they don't want that and always seem to go for (of all things) rock climbing? You understand going for a drink doesn't necessarily mean getting shitfaced until the early morning right? Casual Friday after work drink anyone?
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Pubs are much better than bars because you can actually talk. Maybe that's a Canadian cultural difference, though.
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Pubs/bars/lounge whatever you call it. A place with drinks where the music isn't so loud you need to scream to be heard.
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Oh man, I used to use balms and gels but I stopped because it is a hassle everyday. I only use that product when I am wearing makeup, but ever since coming to Hong Kong, I stopped wearing makeup lol But I still do my skincare routine but I keep it a secret and pretend I just have naturally flawless skin.
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On December 02 2017 09:35 B.I.G. wrote: I don't understand why everyone here has such a dislike for bars. Casual social setting + a drink that helps people relax = easy way to meet people. Why does everyone insist so strongly they don't want that and always seem to go for (of all things) rock climbing? You understand going for a drink doesn't necessarily mean getting shitfaced until the early morning right? Casual Friday after work drink anyone? The problem I see with bars is that nobody goes there to meet people. At least not here in Sweden. People go there with people they know, have a few beers, talk shit. Then go home. It's not like in the movies where some random hot girl is ordering by the counter all by herself - waiting for someone to make a move.
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A pretty average story that I don't feel has much of substance? Not really sure what to make of it other than being quite cliché. I think I am not really the right person for such write ups so feel free to ignore this.
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On December 10 2017 09:00 waffelz wrote:A pretty average story that I don't feel has much of substance? Not really sure what to make of it other than being quite cliché. I think I am not really the right person for such write ups so feel free to ignore this. I liked it because I pictured Robert joining MRA movements afterwards, and wildly distorting the events to his new friends, just like how Margot was probably being slightly unfair to her friends about just how creepy and repulsive Robert actually was.
But the moral of the story for me is that any man who is that anti-social and inappropriate at age 34 is probably not salvageable. I was very insecure and easily wounded when I was like 22, but I hope I am not like that when I am 34...
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On December 10 2017 09:20 Grumbels wrote: I liked it because I pictured Robert joining MRA movements afterwards, and wildly distorting the events to his new friends, just like how Margot was probably being slightly unfair to her friends about just how creepy and repulsive Robert actually was.
Everything that isn't MGTOW is a (partial) win
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On December 10 2017 09:43 waffelz wrote:Show nested quote +On December 10 2017 09:20 Grumbels wrote: I liked it because I pictured Robert joining MRA movements afterwards, and wildly distorting the events to his new friends, just like how Margot was probably being slightly unfair to her friends about just how creepy and repulsive Robert actually was. Everything that isn't MGTOW is a (partial) win https://elladawson.com/2017/12/09/bad-sex-or-the-sex-we-dont-want-but-have-anyway/
Someone else had a different moral than mine, if you’re interested.
(to add, this article was written in response to the story I linked earlier)
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Predict? Every other sentence was hinting towards him being a complete asshole. I was just expecting her to stop being so absurdly naive and take a hike. The manipulation by him in the story was straight up "pick up artist negging".
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Funny to read an encounter like this from a woman's perspective. Just out of curiosity who do you guys side with? Who is the "wrong do-er" here?
And regarding the second article: happy to hear there are still people with common sense out there. I think it's insane how we are comfortable with watching over the top violence on TV while we cringe at a bit of tit. What would you rather have, a teen that shoots up his school or a teen that's pregnant?
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On December 10 2017 19:55 B.I.G. wrote: Funny to read an encounter like this from a woman's perspective. Just out of curiosity who do you guys side with? Who is the "wrong do-er" here?
And regarding the second article: happy to hear there are still people with common sense out there. I think it's insane how we are comfortable with watching over the top violence on TV while we cringe at a bit of tit. What would you rather have, a teen that shoots up his school or a teen that's pregnant? Well in this fictional story the guy is on the wrong side. However, the girl has to take some kind of responsibility. There were sooo many places where she should have thought "Fuck this, I'm out".
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