Now imagine that responsibility is not making yourself look like a needy fool. She denied you, yet you still keep idolizing her in your head. Completely understandable. I've been there as well. It was good of you pro actively ask her out and be denied. Sucks but now you know. Now it's time to move on.
Dating: How's your luck? - Page 956
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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
B.I.G.
3251 Posts
Now imagine that responsibility is not making yourself look like a needy fool. She denied you, yet you still keep idolizing her in your head. Completely understandable. I've been there as well. It was good of you pro actively ask her out and be denied. Sucks but now you know. Now it's time to move on. | ||
Tictock
United States6051 Posts
On November 27 2017 11:14 B.I.G. wrote: "I can take that responsibility" your quote says. Now imagine that responsibility is not making yourself look like a needy fool. She denied you, yet you still keep idolizing her in your head. Completely understandable. I've been there as well. It was good of you pro actively ask her out and be denied. Sucks but now you know. Now it's time to move on. Your right I'm probably still just keeping an unrealistic image of her in my head. Otherwise, fuck that, I'll take responsibility for being the weird, probably needy, fool that I am. I'm not interested in pretending to be something I'm not, I'd rather own who I am and work to improve that person. On November 27 2017 11:13 WarSame wrote: You could ask her if that would be weird. Yea, that's a good thought. I might go ahead and buy the thing and then ask. I can always return it. Asking coworkers to pitch in doesn't work. Possible some people would be willing, but I doubt it. Also I won't have a chance. Thanks for the feedback! | ||
GoTuNk!
Chile4591 Posts
If u want to give a birthday gift just do it, if not, don't. Just don't fool yourself that you get into womans pants with birthday gifts. | ||
evilfatsh1t
Australia8531 Posts
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SCC-Faust
United States3736 Posts
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Titusmaster6
United States5932 Posts
On November 27 2017 10:22 Tictock wrote: I'm finding myself in an odd position here guys. There is this girl who I work with who I like a fair bit, already asked her out and got rejected. I'm pretty sure things won't change there either as while we are friendly there really is nothing going on past good natured work relations. The thing that is bothering me now is that it is her birthday soon and I feel like getting her a gift. Knowing that she wants to start training for a marathon and is generally an outdoorsy person, I am finding myself tempted to by her a Fitbit. I keep telling myself this is a bad idea as it will only make her feel awkward and not want to accept it. Yet I still find myself just wanting to do it as I think it would be nice and she would definitely get use out of it. Am I just crazy for wanting to do this? I want to be clear that I am not at all trying to impress her, win her over, whatever. I just think she is a cool person and want to do something nice for her birthday. Just despite feeling like it will put pressure on her given she knows I like her I can't seem to convince myself not to do this ATM. Talk me down guys. Bad idea, too soon, absolutely do not do it. | ||
derAbsoluteMettmann
1 Post
On November 27 2017 14:02 SCC-Faust wrote: Think I might go gay. Ah yes, the siren song of the wang. Many have headed its call, few came back to tell the tale. | ||
LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On November 27 2017 10:22 Tictock wrote: I'm finding myself in an odd position here guys. There is this girl who I work with who I like a fair bit, already asked her out and got rejected. I'm pretty sure things won't change there either as while we are friendly there really is nothing going on past good natured work relations. The thing that is bothering me now is that it is her birthday soon and I feel like getting her a gift. Knowing that she wants to start training for a marathon and is generally an outdoorsy person, I am finding myself tempted to by her a Fitbit. I keep telling myself this is a bad idea as it will only make her feel awkward and not want to accept it. Yet I still find myself just wanting to do it as I think it would be nice and she would definitely get use out of it. Am I just crazy for wanting to do this? I want to be clear that I am not at all trying to impress her, win her over, whatever. I just think she is a cool person and want to do something nice for her birthday. Just despite feeling like it will put pressure on her given she knows I like her I can't seem to convince myself not to do this ATM. Talk me down guys. Are you buying your male colleagues expensive gifts ? No? Dont do it give her a card or sign an office one like normal ppl do :D | ||
sc-darkness
856 Posts
On November 27 2017 11:11 evilfatsh1t wrote: this ones easy. get coworkers to chip in for the gift. I'm not an expert but I think this has a realistic chance to succeed if you *really* want to give that gift. Obviously, it won't be a personal one but she gets the gift. | ||
urmomdresslikafloozy
191 Posts
I've been dating a girl for a couple weeks that is a veterinarian at the emergency clinic by my house that i took my dog to in the middle of the night. It is going all well until she confided in me that she is has 250k in student loans and 6k in credit card debt and I was like O_o'. Should I take that as a sign to run as fast as I can or should i stick with it? She said she makes 10k a month but pays 8k a month for her time at USC and Amherst medical school. That's like making minimum wage while being a doctor. | ||
LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
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urmomdresslikafloozy
191 Posts
On November 28 2017 10:55 LemOn wrote: Isn't that normal for a young doc? I'd like her honeaty, but make sure she tries to stand on her feet, pay for herself some etc. I believe so, at least in America. She just turned 29, graduated med school 8 months ago, and works 12 hour shifts 10pm to 10am | ||
Shady Sands
United States4021 Posts
On November 28 2017 11:18 urmomdresslikafloozy wrote: I believe so, at least in America. She just turned 29, graduated med school 8 months ago, and works 12 hour shifts 10pm to 10am Yeah that's very normal. How long have you known her? | ||
urmomdresslikafloozy
191 Posts
On November 28 2017 11:36 Shady Sands wrote: Yeah that's very normal. How long have you known her? Going on a month now. She is Hawaiian and Korean, definitely smarter than me, but I own a house that has a lot of equity and she lives in studio apartment so it evens itself out haha. | ||
Titusmaster6
United States5932 Posts
On November 28 2017 10:38 urmomdresslikafloozy wrote: Quick question here: I've been dating a girl for a couple weeks that is a veterinarian at the emergency clinic by my house that i took my dog to in the middle of the night. It is going all well until she confided in me that she is has 250k in student loans and 6k in credit card debt and I was like O_o'. Should I take that as a sign to run as fast as I can or should i stick with it? She said she makes 10k a month but pays 8k a month for her time at USC and Amherst medical school. That's like making minimum wage while being a doctor. Sadly thats perfectly normal in the US. I will be joining that life next year. If you like her go for it! | ||
Ektor Baboden
68 Posts
On November 28 2017 11:18 urmomdresslikafloozy wrote: I believe so, at least in America. She just turned 29, graduated med school 8 months ago, and works 12 hour shifts 10pm to 10am It's kinda normal. For me personally, the fact that she manages to handle that type of situation (if she manages to ) would actually be a plus. Anyway, if you like each other, I don't think the debt should be a dealbreaker at all, unless she's trying to take advantage of you - but it doesn't sound like that's the case at all. | ||
DarkPlasmaBall
United States42257 Posts
On November 28 2017 10:38 urmomdresslikafloozy wrote: Quick question here: I've been dating a girl for a couple weeks that is a veterinarian at the emergency clinic by my house that i took my dog to in the middle of the night. It is going all well until she confided in me that she is has 250k in student loans and 6k in credit card debt and I was like O_o'. Should I take that as a sign to run as fast as I can or should i stick with it? She said she makes 10k a month but pays 8k a month for her time at USC and Amherst medical school. That's like making minimum wage while being a doctor. That's totally normal for a veterinarian; they also make far less money than human doctors, so it takes longer to pay off a comparable amount of student debt. I'm married to a veterinarian and she's the best thing that ever happened to me, so I wouldn't take the necessary financial debt as a sign that your girl is having unique or odd problems. | ||
B.I.G.
3251 Posts
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SCC-Faust
United States3736 Posts
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farvacola
United States18768 Posts
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